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  • QuickLime

    Guidelines and Etiquette for Chatting and Rping In CanterChat

    By QuickLime

    Hello and Welcome to QL'S Guide! I know I already posted earlier today on how to Register your nickname on Canterchat! Link to it is here! But for now I want to talk to you about how one should act, and roleplay in the new and improved Canterlot IRC Irc is a bit different than the old chat, this guide will be broken up into 3 parts 1: Name Etiquette 2: Chatting Etiquette 3: Roleplaying Etiquette Name Etiquette It should BE obvious but you should NEVER use a username that is not yours, and when you first enter the chat we'd like you to do so with your canterlot username so we know who you are. Never use the name of a Moderator, other user, or a RP Character that doesn't belong to you, this is stealing and also incredibly bad manners. Another thing to keep in mind is to not constantly spam the room with name changes, this is rude, distracting, and makes it incredibly hard to keep track of everyone, One name change per hour is normally acceptable provided you don't break the above rule of using a name that doesn't belong to you Chat Etiquette It is polite to try and enter a conversation, the chat is a space for everyone and nobody should dominate the conversation with their personal topic and excluding others from the conversation. If the conversation is only for you and a select group of friends feel free to make your own room by typing /join whatevernameofroomyouwant Otherwise you should try to include everyone in the conversation as nopony likes to feel left out! Another point I'd like to bring up is link spam, linking to one or two pictures is fine (marking NSFW content as nsfw if you please) but if all you do is spam pictures you'll probably be asked to stop as it clutters up the window and is kinda annoying. Language has changed here, minor swears is fine, like "**** I really hated that episode" or "I really love Cheetos **** it!" Is fine, but you should never aim a swear or curse at other users, it's not nice, flaming and abuse will not be tolerated in the chat, we want to encourage a friendly, positive atmosphere RP Etiquette Joining the Canterchat Rp is easy, you type /list into the window and it should bring up a list of the rooms In Canterchat Rp you need to only play characters you own, don't take on Ocs, or cast characters played by someone else, it's not very nice! This only counts to the public room however Be whoever you want in your own private rooms! However stuff in CanterRp is only canon with a cast character if they decide it is Some users like to do "chat style" rp in the rp room and that's fine, but you should always check with all parties involved as some of us (me in particular) prefer paragraph style similar to the boards Overall you should remember to be polite, courteous, and considerate of your fellow users, and treat them as you would like to be treated ! I hope this guide helped and I look forward to chatting with you all! Sincerely the Queen of Ravens

Our community blogs

  1. I believe I promised an explanation of what I've been up to. Well, here it is! I know; a bad start. But bear with me.~


      Though I've lived in the same city for my whole life, I've moved 3 times. Times are tough. Anyway, the second move by far put me in the worst situation. My grandmother and I moved in with my aunt and one of my cousins. Things were fine at first. We got along, had fun, and were civil to each other. I can't remember the moment everything went wrong; frankly, just mentioning this is making me uncomfortable. But I can definitely recall the 3 worst experiences of living with them. My cousin was the one who did the damage. He has a short temper, violent tendancies, and access to various weapons. Not a good combination.


      First, there was the day our internet went out. By necessity, the modem for the internet was kept in my cousin's bedroom. See, he had a desktop computer, so he needed to connect it directly to the modem to get internet access; he couldn't use wi-fi, like the rest of us. He didn't want anybody in his bedroom without permission, no matter the reason. So, try to imagine this. You're somewhere you know you aren't supposed to be, but you don't need to be there for long. Just long enough to press a button, then leave. Then, you hear the front door open. You pray it's anybody but who you think it is. Your aunt. Your grandmother. A burglar with a gun; ANYBODY but your violent cousin. Then, you hear something else. "You're f*****!" In an instant, he's upon you, connecting with blow after blow. The beating only lasts a few seconds, and is followed by a screaming match, in which you desparately try to defend your actions, to no avail. Nobody else is home; nobody can help you. It's you and this monster. I'm thankful he didn't shoot me, or break my phone. But my stomach hurt for days afterwards, and one of his punches busted my lip open. I later found out that he knew I'd do that, and set me up.


     I wasn't the target of the next one, but it was still scary. I honestly forget what set this off, but this was a fight between him and my grandmother. While I didn't see the fight, I heard it, and locked my bedroom door to keep him away. He broke my grandmother's phone, threw hot noodles at her, and spit in her face. Not to mention the raging and swearing. With my phone by my side, I dialed 911. In case you were wondering why I didn't do that during the last incident, rest assured it wouldn't have helped. Police did show up, but, despite my insistance that he was in possession of drugs and a firearm, nothing was done.


      Likely the most scared I've ever been was when I broke my cousin's prized mortar and pestle. He kept them on a shelf in the bathroom. I had just gotten out of the shower, and grabbed my underwear, which I had put on that shelf, as well. Suddenly, I heard something shatter. No. Oh, dear sweet Celestia, NO!! The stick part - I forget what it's called - hit the tile floor and broke into 2 pieces. I thought, without exaggeration, that would be my last day alive. I wanted to run. To run and not look back until I was sure this demon couldn't find me. My grandmother, much to my horror, ordered that I tell my cousin the truth. So I did. Honestly, I'm still surprised I'm alive to type this. He screamed at me, and threatened to kick my throat in. But he never actually struck. He insisted that what I broke was irreplaceable, despite my telling him that I had found plenty more online that I was willing to buy as a replacement.


      We made up last Christmas, but I still have flashbacks. My grandmother and I moved to an apartment complex, where we live now. I actually don't live too far away from that house of horror. I don't dare go back. I accidentally had something shipped there, because I forgot to change my shipping address online. Whoever lives there now can keep it.

  2. Mojo
    Latest Entry

    I had avoided watching any of Season 8 because I just didn't care much for the show anymore, well that and I no longer have access to Discover Family.  However, I took time today to watch episodes from that season and I must admit, they were pretty good.


    NOT saying that I have my full enthusiasm for MLP again, but at least I feel good viewing this latest season.


    Shows are hard to find on YT, guess Hasbro changed their policy on them since last season.


    Oh well, I'm still around, watching from afar.....

  3. Alivda
    Latest Entry

    Sorry guys, but with my moving, as well as some other stressful stuff, I won't be able to continue the playlist of the week for now. I will still be posting on the forums, so no worries there! 


    Anyways, hope to see all ya as soon as I can,



  4. [ BAST ]

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    My pairings : ( NOT ALL WILL HAVE KIDS!! ) 

    Tempest Shadow and Fluttershy [ I have a very interesting story for these two ] 

    Maud Darlene Pie (I made this up, it fits to me) and Trixie Lulamoon 

    Thorax and Spike 

    Pinkamena Diane Pie and Princess Twilight Sparkle 

    SciTwi and Timber 

    Sunset Shimmer and Flash Sentry 

    Starlight Glimmer and Sunburst 

    Shining Armor, Princess Cadence and Queen Chrysalis [ Love has no boundaries for these three ] 

    Apple Jack and Trouble shoes 

    Big Mac and Sugarbelle 

    Silverspoon and Babseed 

    Scootalo and Diamond tiara 

    Apple bloom is single in my verse 

    Sweetie Belle is also single 

    Cheese Sandwhich and Prince Blueblood [ I love the story I made for them ]

    Trenderhoof and Zephyr Breeze 

    Gilda and Lightning Dust

    Rarity and Rainbowdash 



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    Hello everycreatureone. It is I Szalhi, commander over the creatures of my creation and the most human thing on the world (take that robots.) Or basically, I'm just a user if you're boring and need clarification. This is my first Blog that is not completely satirical (although if you want me to keep doing the wholesome episode reviews, then I'll totally do that. I've only done Four episodes so far, and It's totally been hard work.) 


    In this blog I'm going to talk about something I have no personal experience with at all, but is such a passion for me because I'm weird about that. You should all know about it, it's literally one thing all my OC's have. 




    You see to me, Disabled characters are only relevant if their disability is just a trait. As much as there is a downside, it can't have such a significant part in disrupting the equillibrium. A disabled character should work to overcome as much of their disability as they can, to replace their loss. But the replacement shouldn't be a direct replication. I'm not going to say I hate ponies who overcome their disability with a direct replacement, I'm just saying it doesn't add much to the character at all I.E magic eyes and stuff. Basically anything that they didn't have to earn on their own.  


    You can see that through my four OC's I have on this site. 

    Loose Cannon: Loose is blind, has been since shortly after birth. She does not remember anything about sight, but I'm not going to deny that she did have it for upmost a week. Her blindness was caused by Uveitis meaning her eyes basically burned out. Her blindness by default doesn't completely restrict navigation, but compared to a sighted pony, then it is obvious that it is not as good. It also does not restrict her verbal communication, but it does restrict traditional written communication.


    What's her replacements? Well to assist in navigation there is Echolocation. Echolocation is the use of the feedback from echoes to interpret the distance and shapes of objects. I could do a more precise explanation, but I'm not feeling very scientific right now. Obviously, it's not a direct replacement for sight, in fact it is entirely based off a different system which is sound. This means it has some upsides over sight navigation like not being reliant on light sources. However it of course has some downsides. A big downside is that you're putting two eggs in one basket. If she goes deaf, she just basically lost two different systems. Another downside is that the range at what Loose can perceive entities is much lower. 


    There's also braille. Braille is just a tactile replacement for the written script. It is designed differently from the roman alphabet to accommodate the accuracy of the sense of touch. Basically, it's way more efficient than embossing letters. It's way more simple and takes up less space. 


    AS a fun fact, Loose Cannon was made as the final project of basically a bunch of prototype oc's that were never fully developed. 


    Echo: Quite the ironic name for a pony that can't hear echoes at all. Yeah, her disability is deafness, not that original when you consider she was made after Loose Cannon, but you know, I can't just have all blind ponies, that would get boring fast. (Maybe I should make a blind pony without Echolocation.) As she's deaf, she has less convenient options to communicate with others. Writing stuff down can be annoying, and not everypony knows how to sign (How do ponies sign?) She also can't listen to her environment around her for analysis purposes.


    Well, what are her replacements? Well to replace the lack of communication she has the ability to lip read. She uses the movement of the lips and tongues to try and interpret their conversation. She then uses this to learn to speak. However of course, there's more to speaking than just lip reading, there's also tones and stuff. Well, she can't hear, but she can feel vibrations. It is these vibrations that she uses to replicate speech. She's not mute, she's perfectly capable of Speaking as long as she knows what sounds to make. But of course, languages can suck and sounds are pretty diverse. Some words she can pronounce pretty well, but try and give her a big word and she's going to mess up a sound in there. Due to this, she isn't going to babble on for a long time as even talking for more than ten seconds can get uncomfortable.


    Wait, but what about signing? Well, Echo never learnt to sign, if that's even a thing ponies are capable of doing and have developed. Why try learning to sign when speaking is way more convenient for her interactions with society?


    There's also improved eyesight. Sure it's not as cool as Echolocation, but being able to see and distinguish things easier is a very significant trait. No its not see micro-organisms levels of sight, but it's more or less processing more information and not dumping the "useless" bits out. 


    Tranquility & Placidity. These twins are mute. Now honestly, this isn't as drastic of a disability as the other two, but it is still relevant to their skills. They're twins. What do you have with twins? Supposedly psychic connections. What if they were unicorns? Well, then it can be even more literal and advanced. The two of them have no verbal communication to their disposal, but they do have their natural connection to build off of. So with that they managed to go even further beyond their personal connection and broadcast their thoughts, or what thoughts they allow to the outside world. This is used through either a direct link, or a sphere of influence. Generally, if they are talking to someone who is new, then they will use the sphere of influence. Ponies generally don't like their mind being invaded or tapped into without their allowance, but the sphere of influence is more public so it's generally more acceptable. If the target is more comfortable, then they will use a more direct private connection for communication, the direct link isn't sound based at all, but rather the subject essentially converts it into a form that is the most comfortable to them. To most ponies that would be voices, but it can also be displayed in other forms. Really all this means is that unless the subject is basically completely brain dead and as long as the correct language is being used, then they will be able to understand everything that is being transmitted.


    Alright, i guess that's really about it for now. I've been meaning to post this for a month, but things have kept coming up, mostly me wondering whether or not this was worth posting, but I don't really care anymore. i'm not going to spoil any of you on my next post as if it took me a month to publish this one, I really don't know what to do for that...


    I won't be changing this post if my opinions change or if I get a new character. This isn't a log. It's a representation of the time period I posted this.








  5. Words cannot accurately describe HOW excited I am for this song. Not only is it a song by my all time favourite band ever, it marks the teasing beginning of a new saga in Coheed and Cambria's repertoire. The last album, The Colour Before The Sun was awesome, but it was also a departure from the norm in that it was the first non-concept album to date (not counting albums from when they were Shabutie). Before then, their previous albums had followed the store of The Amory Wars, a story and comic series written by their lead singer Claudio Sanchez. This new saga will likely prove to be just as amazing and thought provoking. I could go into the premise we were given here, but you can click through to the Youtube video to give it a looksee there. Without further ado, enjoy!


  6. Wait wait wait, Rarity's entrusting Fluttershy over a fashion store? -1 score.


    Snob shy? Cool


    Valley shy? Cool


    Goth shy? Cool


    Fluttershy arbitray anti-personality disorder? Character development.



    8/10 final score.

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    Dear diary


    It's been a week or so since I've moved here. 

    I'm realizing how big Canterlot is, but I saw Princess Cadance today..! 

    I also decided to name the shop "The Filly's Lillies". Creative right? 

    That's all, Diary


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    "Mommy are they gonna make fun of me?" slivermoon asked.

    "mostly likely. now when they introduce you your name is breaking day. remember it and don't embarrass me!"  Her mother, dawn lover, shot a glare at slivermoon. Slivermoon didn't understand why her mother disliked her so much. 

    "Yes mama. I will do my best to be the daughter you want and not the disgrace that you were cursed with." Slivermoon's eyes welled with tears. Her eyes were pinned, and her head was down.

    "Yes, you'd better do that or no dinner tonight!"  When they reached the school her mother's face and aura changed into bright and happy so sliver did the same. 

    "Hello there!" the teacher said greeting them with bright smiles. "this must breaking day? am I correct?" she asked smiling down at silver.

    "Yes that's my name!" silver gave a bright smile. that's the first time she meet one of the sweetest teachers ever.


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    Hello all! 


    I felt it was time to dust off this blog, because just like the Friendship Journal in "Fame and Misfortune" this one is probably falling apart! 


    So this blog is going to hopefully answer the burning question: "Lux, where are you?" To answer this I'm going to have to do some time magic here...


    Flash back to 2012. This was the time that I fully considered myself as a Brony and joined this site. If you were to put me on a scale of 1 through 10 with 1 being not interested at all in MLP and 10 being that my life was devoted to MLP and nothing much else, in 2012 I would put myself at an 8. True, i had other interests, but at the time I was really devoted to the fandom. I was writing fan fiction, drawing fan art, role playing, creating my own pony OCs, and even attending a few pony conventions. 


    Now let's move forward to 2015. If I were to put myself on the scale again, I'd be a 4. Why the drop? Well, it was a couple of things: 


    • A waning interest in MLP. It wasn't that I gave up on it, but there were other interests in my life that appeared, which meant my interest dropped a little. 
    • Lack of time due to my former job. I worked retail up until a few months ago, so my schedule was very unpredictable. This meant that I couldn't devote as much time as I wanted to on things like art, role playing, writing fan fiction, etc. This wasn't just MLP but all aspects of my creative life. I look back at how much non-MLP art I drew in 2014 and then at 2015 and 2016 and saw how little I did.
    • Lack of role playing. Now, I'm not putting the blame on anypony here, but the truth was that many of the threads I was in suddenly died out. This, combined with not coming up with threads on my own, led to me dropping much of my presence here. 


    So, now we go back to the present, and after a little hiatus, I'm happy to say that I'm getting back into MLP. I'm now back at a 6 or so on the scale. Will I ever get back to the level I was when I started? Probably not. Things change and so do interests. But what I'm planning on doing is the following: 


    • Restarting drawing MLP canon and OC characters. 
    • Getting back into Role Playing. Ok, so I'll still keep many of my characters under the Hiatus status, but there will be some of the more popular characters like Lore Weaver, Fire Heart, Watermelon Gush, and others who are going to host their own threads. 
    • As for fan fiction, I'm in the process of finishing my recent story. What's going to happen in the future? Well, I don't have any ideas yet, but who knows? 


    So there you go. I'm back in some fashion, and look forward to more fun.

  7. AskInk.png




    This is a thing I did for a short while, and then something happened and it kind of fell off the wagon. But, I always felt kind of bad for not answering the last few people and never giving any indication if I was continuing the blog or not. Most of them are probably not active on the site anymore, but, in any case, I decided to go ahead and finish off a few of their questions anyways, just because. And because I got a few more expressions done. 


    Heeeeeeere we go!



    If you had to get married.... Who would be your choice as wife or hubby?


    yvomRbQ.png "Well...I mean..." *cue fantasy montage*


    Unrealistic daydreams aside...Inkbrand likes mares, so stallions would be right out. But as far as a realistic choice for a lifelong wife, he'd want someone who'll let him do his own thing and be himself, and basically be the most chillax mare in existence. 


    What he needs though, is a mare that would like him for who he is, but still challenge him to become better. Not demand that he change himself to fit what she wants, of course, but not be so complacent that no change occurs at all. Inkbrand is completely fine with himself as he is, but that doesn't make him the best that he can be. And that doesn't mean that he needs to turn into sunshine and rainbows and puppy dogs, but that's also not to say that he is perfect as is and that he doesn't need to make improvements. 



    Do you ever want to have some foals of your own?





    "I mean yeah, sure, suppose I might. Way off in the future...like, way off, right. Little mini-me running around? Heh, that'd be pretty sweet as. But uh, I dunno. Not really a life goal of mine, 'ya know? If I end up with a foal of my own, I'd...that'd be alright. But if I don't, whelp. S'alright with me."


    Basically, Inkbrand's not adverse to the idea of having foals of his own...but that's not something he's actively looking for, either. At least right now.


    "You better bucking believe it! I'm in the prime of my life, baby, don't have time to be babysitting foals."


    Didn't really have a problem with it not that long ago -


    "YEAH well, I mean. Buck, those were special circumstances, and only a couple 'o months. Big difference between a few months and a bucking lifetime."



    Oh! Oh! I have a question!!

    Do mares chase or swoon over you? (The answers quite obvious isn't it?)

    If so, how does it feel?


    Flirty.png"Didn't you ask me a question about my love life earlier? You seem pretty interested in it..."

    Naw, that was someone else.


    "Oh! Well...the flirt still works, buck it."


    Funnily enough, most of the mares who chase or swoon over Inkbrand do so in completely roundabout ways. They seem more interested in getting Inkbrand interested in them rather than showing their interest themselves...which makes their interest all the more obvious. More mares (and the RPers who play them) seem to think that having a pretty character, or a mare covered in tattoos, or a mare with a white coat, is enough to catch Inkbrand's attention and make him fall madly in love with the character. And what they'll do is just place their character in his vicinity, thinking that Inkbrand will come bounding over to drool all over them. 


    So to answer the question more concisely...yes, it is obvious when most mares swoon over Inkbrand. However, they rarely do any chasing themselves, but instead embark on elaborate song and dance steps meant to entice Inkbrand while pretending they aren't interested at all. Which, again, makes their interest all the more blatant.


    "They all just wanna play Innocent Schoolfilly to the Big Bad Punk Stallion. Which, 'ya know...I'm okay with."



    Any hopes or dreams you'd like to share with us?


    WLT0dh2.png"Heh-heh. Hopes and dreams, huh?"


    "I'll let 'ya in on a little secret, buddy. I'm a simple kind of stallion. I mean sure, I might wanna become the only tattoo artist worth visiting in Equestria and brand a tat onto a royal flank featuring a sun or moon design, but hey. I'm already the Best Bucking Tattoo Artist in Equestria already, so those dreams aren't too far off, right?


    And, well...




    He's got his hopes and dreams like pretty much everyone else, even if some of them he'd rather not share. 


    Thanks for reading! Because I made some new expressions I might continue this blog if there is enough of a response for it, but for the most part, I wanted to wrap up some of the questions that people took the time to ask and I never got around to answer. If any of you are still around, hope you enjoyed the Q&A!

  8. The things that go on inside a restaurant hostess's mind, I.e. a typical shift.


    "Why didnt you call ahead."


    "No, I CANT seat you there!"


    "When are you leaving I need this table."


    "Are you seriously telling me you need a table meant for 6 people when there is only 2 of you?!"


    "Stop seating yourself you are confusing everybody!"


    "Why didnt you call ahead???"


    "Its not my fault your table went to somebody else.  I texted you twice saying your table was ready. You chose to take your sweet time getting back!"

    "You've been here for 2 hours its time to leave"


    "Unless you wanna be served by a ghost you're not being sat in the closed section."


    "PLEASE go to the bar! PLEEEEEEEEASE"






    "No if I seat you there Im double seating and the server will have my head on a pike for doubleseating in her section"




    "You are not the only party of 12 who decided not to call ahead on a Saturday night.  Now either wait 4 hours for a table or leave." 




    "Im so hungry... I wonder if there's any dead food in the back to pick at..."


    "Asking me about your 1 HOUR WAIT TIME will not make your 1 HOUR WAIT TIME go any faster now vanish from my host stand."


    "Im sorry you're upset that you and your party of 10 have to wait 2 hours for a table.  There are 3 large parties ahead of you and two of them didnt call ahead just like you didnt call ahead, and there's no server who isnt already swamped that can serve you without being a miserable wreck all night. You are free to leave us your number so we can call you at a later time when a table actually is ready.  And if you arrive within 10 minutes, we can seat you instead of giving your table to someone else.  Until then, GET OUT MY FACE."


    "If you wanna camp do it in the woods not in the restaurant!  LEAVE NOW OR GET THE HOSE"


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    The one who lives under the protection of the most high dwells in the shadow of the Almighty. His faithfulness will be a protective shield. You will not fear the terrors of the night.

  9. Flame
    Latest Entry

    This is just for fun. So surprise.

  10. Hey guys. I'm back with Shadow's story. It's near completion and I for got to mention last time that this is a school project  that is due Monday next week. No joke. So I'd like if you guys left comments and suggestions on what to do down below. I just need two more chapters then you guys will see the final product. For now enjoy.



    It all started in 2017. That’s when the Maroon Empire took over. They were relentless. All they had to do is kill the world’s leaders. After that the made it illegal to own any weapons unless you were part of the street police or their military. The ruled for about 5 years without problems. Then the rebellion came. That’s when everything changed.






    The Assignment

    Date: 3/13/2022

    Time: 00:01

    Location: Maroon Military Data Storage Facility (M.M.D.S.F)

    Mission: Collect data from military computers.




            The vent fell off the wall with a loud Bang. “I hope no one heard that,” I thought to myself as I leaped from the air ducts.

            “Commander, I’m in the building,” I said into my com link quietly.

            “Good. I’m sending you a list of what the Lotus Lady wants.”

            My Pip Boy started vibrating. I lifted my arm up to see the list of files. “Dang. She wants a lot of files,” I thought, “Then again we need all that we can get.”

            “Alright. I see what I can grab,”I said as I approached a computer. I started up the monitor as I sat down. The Maroon logo popped up. I’ve grown to hate the gold and maroon colored symbol. I started typing away as I hacked the system. Soon I found myself staring at a screen with files on it just like the ones in the list. JACKPOT! I thought almost out loud.[a] I took the extension cord from my Pip Boy and plugged it into the download port. I didn’t have to wait that long until the files were on my Pip Boy and a hard drive.

            “Commander. I got them,” I said to the com link.

            “Good. Now get the heck outta dodge,” he said excitedly.

            “Will do,”I said right as the alarms went off. “Son of a gun,” I said angrily through gritted teeth.

            “Freeze!” a voice said harshly. “Turn around. Slowly. And step into the light where we can see you”

            I turned around like the voice demanded and saw the voice belonged to a security trooper. He was dressed in white armour with blue stripes on his arms, chest, legs and helmet. His blaster was pointed at my chest. Slowly the guard approached, acting as if I were an animal of some kind.

            “Now,”he said calmly, “you and I are going to take a walk over to the security office and take a look at what you’ve downloaded.”

            “Alright,” I said as walked towards him. As soon as I was next to him I took my elbow and hit him in the visor of his helmet.

            “Shadow? You alright in there?” the commander asked worried.

            “I’m fine. Just a rookie guard. I’m on my way out,” I said as I climbed into the vents and put the cover on.

            It took me ten minutes to get out of the vents and on to my motorcycle at the back of the building. As I rode through the city neon lights lit the place up enough it was almost like it was day out.[c] “The good old capital. Brightest city in the world,” I thought as I made my way to a bar that was almost ready to close.

            “Rebel Special!” I yelled as I closed the door.

            “Will do,” said Jackson as he pressed a hidden button behind a picture of a Samuel Adams beer mug. A door opened in the wall next to the bathrooms with a ladder in it. I climbed down into the darkness and opened another door with my Pip Boy.

            “There you are,”the commander said. “The Lotus Lady is wait for you.”

    “Got it,” I said as I walked pass him.

    “Hey guys!” someone shouted “Grant is back!”

    “Wooo!” Someone screamed.

    “Man, I’m popular,” I thought as I opened the door to the office of our leader “The Lotus Lady.”


            “Ah, Shadow,” The Lotus Lady said with pleasure,”I assume that you got what I requested.”

            “Right here,” I responded as I slide the hard drive over to her.

            She took the drive and put into a port on a laptop she had on her desk. She took a brief look at the screen and said, “Very good. Well done Shadow. Now I have another mission for you.”

            “What kind?” I asked curious.

            “A spy mission, and these are your targets,” she said as she closed the laptop and pulled out five files each with a picture attached. I picked up the files and saw that the pictures were of the Emperor's daughters.

    “Spy mission? More like Staker mission,”I said with a chuckle.

    “You’ll be attending their school as a peer.”

    “What kind of school?”

    “A private school. The best school there is.”

    “Oh goodie. Let me guess, uniforms?”

    “Yes,”said The Lotus Lady with an unreadable expression.

    “Uhg. I hate uniforms.”

    “You'll be heading out tomorrow to move into our dorm.”

    “What about equipment?”

    “Already packed and ready for use.”

    “How am I going to spy on the older three? Haven’t they already graduated?”

    “The oldest is the principal. The second oldest is the vice principal, and the middle child is the guidance counselor.”

    “And I’m guessing that the youngest two are getting ready to graduate?”

    “Yes. Study those files when you can, but now you need to get some rest.”


    “You know Shadow. I think that this mission will be good for you considering what happened five years ago.”

    “What do you mean?”

    “I mean you need to make some friends and get out of the past.”

    “ I swore to stay in the past till I avenge what happened, and I won’t stop till that happens.”

    “I understand that, but still there is something that in you that I see that you might not that’ll cause trouble. Anyway, dismissed.”







    Only One Can Remain

    Date: 3/14/22

    Time: 3:30

    Location: Capital High School

    Mission: Spy on the Emperor's daughters:Phase One: set up base


            I was sitting in my truck listening to my playlist one youtube. The Warrior Song was playing when the school come into view. It had tall white walls surrounding it with a gate painted gold.

    “You have an appointment?” the guard in the window asked as I pulled up.

    I quickly pulled out a paper saying that I was a new student. The guard took it and opened up the gate.

    “Enjoy your time here sir,” the guard said as he gave the paper back.

            As I pulled into the parking lot I saw the courtyard. It was covered with trees and flower beds. There were also streams that led from fountain to fountain. Students dotted the green grass. Some of them sat on benches. All of it was beautiful thanks to the Maroon Empire. I HATED it. I got out of the truck and felt people staring at me, but I ignored it and started unloading my “stuff”. I unloaded the boxes in the cab first so no one could look in them and find out about who I really am. Thankfully no one approached me. I am know for giving off a bad vibe when I want. I went up to my dorm so I could get an idea of what I have to work with. The dorm was like a hotel room. There was a live area with a T.V. along with a kitchen that had a oven and refrigerator. The bedroom had a work desk and king size bed. “When the Maroon put in dorms the go all out,”I thought. I started heading down to the parking lot to unpack some more when I heard a knock at the door. I open up my door to see a jock standing there.

            “You the guy with the truck parked outside?” he asked a smile on his face.

            “Yeah, so?” I asked with a shrugging.

            “Well,”he said,”You look like you were built to play some sports so…”

            “So you want me to join?”


            “I’ll join... if you can beat me in a fight,”I said casually.

            “Okay,”He said a little suprised,”how about we go and fight in the wrestling room.”



            As we walked to the wrestling room more jocks started flanking us. He must have told his buddies that there was going to be a fight. We entered the wrestling room and saw that everything was already moved. The jocks that came with us surrounded the ring in the middle of the room.

            “What are the stakes?” the jock that came to my room asked curiously.

            “The stakes: if I win I don’t join the teams, if you win you place me on a team of your choice,”I said with a voice calm enough that it would creep anyone out.

            “Alright then,” he said as he went to the other side of the ring.

            One of the jocks came into the middle

    “Begin,” he said. The jock that met with me hit me square in the chest making me fly back.

    “Hu, I thought you were going to be more of a fight than that.

    “Well,”I said taking my sunglasses off,”Only one can remain”

    Everyone gasped in shock. I figure they would since my eyes are unnatural. Instead of have white in them, it’s replaced by black and the irises are a blood red.

    I took advantage of the shock and rammed my elbow into his face. He came to his senses right after that, but he had no time to respond to my series of attacks. Next I clawed his face, then knifed him in the throt. He went down after that. He was completely unconscious.

    “What the heck?” one of jock asked hatred and surprise lacing his voice.

    “Like I said ‘Only one can remain,’”I answered,”It was his choice.” Then I walked out.


    I got out to my truck and gathered everything and took it to my dorm and continued to set up the place. It was night by the time I finish my work. I was happy to be finished. I started up the security systems and linked them to my computer. After that I got ready to hit the sack and watch youtube (I’m glad it survived the wiping that the Maroons did). Then I fell asleep  in the middle of a video.











    First Day Of School

    Date: 3/15/22


    Location: Capital High School (C.H.S)

    Mission: Spy on the Emperor's daughters:Phase Two: Locate targets



            BEEP! BEEP! BEEP! CRACK! “Man, I hated alarm clocks,” I said drowsily since I was just getting up. “What day is it?” I asked looking at my Pip Boy,“OH JEEZ IT’S MONDAY!” I rush over to my dresser and got my school uniform and hopped in the shower. After the shower I got a microwaveable sausage and gravy poppie going(my favorite). Then I stop and said “Why am I rushing? I got at least a half hour.” So I sat down on my couch and turned the news on. This has become a habit since I’ve joined the rebels. I watch the news just to keep up on what the Maroons are doing.

            “And our military has found a rebel base in the city in the Emerald Sector,”the reporter said with an unreadable voice. “Emerald sector?” I thought “Guess some of the rich kids want to rebel as well. I make a note on that.” 


            Time: 8:15


    “Alright class settle down,”the teacher said “Now I know that there are rumors saying that there’s a new student. Well, they are true. So allow me to introduce David McLearin, will you please stand.”

    I stood up immediately on instinct since I was trained to follow orders.

    “David, do you care to tell us anything about yourself?” the teacher asked.

    “Yeah. Don’t mess with me if you want your limbs intact,” I said as cold enough to freeze the warmest of blood.

    “Wait a second. You’re the one who beat up the captain yesterday,”a jock three rows up exclaimed.

    “You’re right!”another one said.

    “I oughtta give you a knuckle sandwich,” said a third.

    “And I suggest you take my advice, unless you want to end up like your captain,”I said taking my sunglasses off for them to see my eyes again. Everyone who saw my face gasp then started yelling things like demon, monster, and devil. The jocks though started chanting telling their friends to fight.

    “If it’s a fight you want then,”I said eagerly, “only one can remain.” At this point my eyes started to glow a blood red. At the rebel base I worked at in the slum sectors everyone would know to back off, here though no one got that.

    “That’s enough class!,”the teacher finally yelled. “Open your textbooks to page 853,”she said clearly upset by the commotion.

    “I get you later,”a jock hissed. “Try to ‘get me later’ and you’ll be a broken corps,”I thought.




    I was on my way to lunch when the jocks from my home room cut me off.

    “Can I get through?”I asked a little rudely.

    “Not till you pay the toll,”one of them said grinning and eager. At this point they were surrounding me.

    “Alright then. What’s the price?”I asked already knowing what it might be.

    “The same thing that happened to the captain,”he said as one of his buddies punched me in the back. I returned the favor with a elbow to the stomach. Thunk. I reeled back with fire in my veins.

    “What’s the matter? Can hit us with metal plating on, now can you?” the jock said laughing.

    “If anyone finds out about that then you’ll be sent to prison for treason.” Fuwip. “The can’t be good. Only a pocket knife sounds like that,” I thought as pain across the right side of my back.

    “No one will find out. You can count one that,” he said has he started downwards with the knife, but to his surprise I quickly whipped around and stopped it.

    “You want a fight? I give you a fight!”I shouted as I lifted him and slammed him into the tile floor. He went out cold. His friends then lunged at me with their own knifes. I was able to catch one of them, but the other cut me from my right temple to my chin. At this point my eyes were glowing bright and furious. I subdued the second then punched the third through the wall. I then charged at him to deliver the final blow. When I got to him and was about to punch I felt pain flow through my chest. I looked down and saw that he had put his knife right over my heart. I looked back at the jock.

    “Died you demon,”he said faintly while grinning.

    “Hail to the king,” I said as I pulled the knife out of my chest and stab it through his hand. “Hail to the one...kneel to the crown...stand in the sun...hail to the king,”I said as I fainted before I collapsed.





    Date: 3/17/22


    Location: Capital High School (C.H.S) Medical Wing

    Mission: Spy on the Emperor's daughters:Phase Two: Locate targets



            Beep...Beep...Beep. This is the sound I awoke to. Everything was blurry at first, but as my vision cleared I was able to make out a white room with a couple of windows. I felt myself laying in a bed. I started to focus on where the beeping was coming from. That’s when I realized that I had no shirt.

    “My cover might get blown if I can’t find a shirt,”I thought since I had the eight pointed rebel star tattooed to my chests like most rebels do. Then there was a knock on the door and it opened. A girl walked in. She had blond hair and blue eyes. Her skin had a peach tone to it.

    “Oh, you’re awake,”she said half surprise half glad.

    “Who are you?” I asked hesitantly.

    “Hm? Oh, My name is Fiora,”she said with a smile on her face with a voice that made me feel relaxed, “What’s your’s?”

    “My name is Grant,”I said trying to stay calm.

    “Grant? What a nice name,”she said delighted.

    “Thanks,”I said while thinking,”Stay calm, stay calm,just don’t let her see your chest or you’re DEAD.”

    “You know there’s no point in trying to hide the mark on our chest,¨ Fiora said when she noticed me trying to hide my chest with the blanket, ¨I´ve already seen it.¨

    ¨Seen what?¨ I asked as if I didn't know what she was talking about.

    ¨The mark on your chest,¨ she said shaking her head a little, ¨you're a rebel.¨

    ¨Oh, you know what that means,¨ I asked sheepishly.

    ¨Who doesn't know the mark of the rebels?¨

    ¨Are you going to turn me in?¨

    ¨No,¨ she said catching me off guard.


    ¨It´ll be our little secret,¨ she said winking.

    ¨What about the nurse?¨I asked quickly.

    ¨She on vacation till next week,¨Fiora said tilting her head with a shrug. ¨So what is a rebel like you doing here?¨

    ¨I...was sent to spy on you and your sisters for the rebels,¨ I hesitated.

    ¨Oh,¨she said sounding a little disappointed.

    ¨Yeah,¨I said not knowing what to do.

    ¨Well, you can tell the rebels that they have an ally in the royal family,¨ she smiling at me ¨in the meantime what happened to your eyes?¨

    ¨Itś a long story,¨ I said not really wanting to share.

    ¨I´ve got time,¨she said sounding intrigued.

    ¨Well, it starts like this,¨I said guessing it wouldn't hurt to share it.




    The Eyes

    Date: 7/4/15

    Time: 12:30

    Location: Monticello, IL

    Mission: None


            “The Shadow is back everyone with yet another survival episode with Beemer (aka Noah) and his friends,”I said since I was broadcasting.

            “Hey viewers it’s nice to see guys again,”Noah said in the background since he was broadcasting also, “and today I’m here with Shadow, KillerWilliam, and the rest of the gang.”

            “Hey what’s that noise?”I asked hoping someone was hearing the same whistling sound that I heard.

            “Maybe they’re launching the firework early,” Noah suggested

            “Dude, it’s 12:30 in the afternoon,”I said rejecting the idea, “there is no way they’d launch this early.” That’s when the loudest sound I’ve ever heard hit my ears. Then there was a flash of light and the world went black.

    I woke up laying on my side covered in ash. I then knew what that sound was. The Maroon Empire had launched nukes at the Mid-West home of the rebels.

    “Lacey!”I cried out hoping my dog would come, but she didn’t. “Cal, Reid!” I said hoping my siblings were there to respond, but none came. That’s when I noticed the camera was still intact and rolling.

    “Hey guys,”I said to the cam as I picked it up, “It’s me Shadow, if anyone is watching this please send help. I just got my town nuked, I don’t know if the others are alive. And I think that I may be the only survivor. This is no joke guys, just see for yourself,” with that I turned the camera and turned around in a circle. “So for of those watching I’ll be giving updates on my position every day. For now I’m in what used to be Monticello Illinois. See ya all tomorrow,” and I turned the camera off after that and started looking for anything worth salvaging.

    It was the end of the day by the time I made a shelter and salvaged things from a refrigerator I found in the rubble near by. The contents included Cola, lunch meat, cheese, milk, and more. I also found my backpack and emptied it of my school work. I made my shelter using a tent I found in what used to be my garage. The night was hot and moist. I didn’t get much sleep.

    The next day I found a mirror and was surprised at what I saw. My eyes weren’t normal. The white in them was replaced with pure black and my irises went from hazel to blood red. I suddenly got angry and turned to punch a nearby safe. To my surprise my hand went through the metal and didn’t hurt after word. I then knew what I had to do.





    The Notice

    Date: 3/20/22

    Time: 21:50

    Location: Capital High School (C.H.S)

    Mission: Spy on the Emperor's daughters:Final Phase



            I was getting ready for bed when my Pip Boy started vibrating. “Strange,”I thought, “I thought that the rebels weren’t going to contact me till tomorrow.”

            “Shadow here,” I said pick up the lifting up the Pip Boy.

            “Shadow, the base has been compromised,”said The Lotus Lady.

            “What?” I asked shocked.

    “Your extraction has been moved to next week.”

    “Next week? Why not tomorrow?”

    “Most of the rebels have been scattered, so until most of them get back there’s nothing we can do.”

    “Alright. I’ll wait till next week,” I said with a bit of anger.

    “Good, also try not to get caught.”

    “Okay,” I said with a sound of sadness to it as I put up the Pip Boy.

    A knock came from the door.

    “Grant, you in there?” said the voice at the door. I knew immediately that it was Fiora since only she has a voice as sweet as the one at the door.

    “Yeah, give me a second,” I said as I approached the door.

    “Hey, Grant you have a moment?” Fiora said when the door was opened.

    “Yeah. You want to come in?”

    “No, I’m fine.”

    The hall fell silent.

    “So,” Fiora said breaking the silence, “the spring gala is tomorrow and I was wondering if you wanted to go.”

    “Yeah. Of course I’ll go with you,” I stammered.

    “Really?” Fiora said sounding surprised.


    “I guess I’ll see you tomorrow.”

    “I guess so.”

    She then left after a little hesitation and I went to bed.



    The Gala, The Goddess, and The Rebel

    Date: 3/11/22

    Time: 20:29

    Location: Capital High School (C.H.S)

    Mission: Wait for extraction



            “Tonight is the night,”I thought,”tonight I’ll avenge the Midwest and all who fell to the Maroon Empire. Tonight the Emperor will DIE.”

    I was walking to pick up Fiora from her dorm. I was wearing a black suit with a blood red tie and trim. I was starting to get anxious as I held the knife up my sleeve in place. Then Giora walked out of her dorm. I gazed in awe as she walked out. She wore a elegant red silk dress, a gold bracelet with a ruby in it’s centre. He blond hair was slightly curled and fell from her shoulders. It took me a moment to shake the effects her beauty set on me.

    “Ready?” I asked

    “Yeah,” she said nodding her head.

    We walked in silence for a while.

    “I liked your suit. I fits you,”Fiora said interrupting the silence.

    “Thanks,”I smiled, “You look like a goddess.”

    She didn’t say anything, but I could see her smile out of the corner of my eye.


    We walked up to the ballroom entrance as a guard came up to us.

    “Ten notes,” he said after looking us over.

    I pulled out some of the notes I made in my room earlier that day. As we entered the ballroom I saw my most hated nemesis. The Emperor. He was dressed in a maroon suit with a gold tie and trim. His black hair was comb like trumps. He had a small beard also, not something that shows on many pictures.

    “Ah, Fiora,” he cried out as soon as he spotted us, “it’s so good to see again.”

    “It’s nice to see you to dad,” Fiora said as the Emperor meet up with us.

    “And who is this?” asked with a confused look on his face.

    “This is my friend, Grant,” Fiora said smiling.

    “Oh good. For a second I thought he was your ‘special someone’,” he said obviously relieved, “Now I don’t have to worry about him courting you.” He started looking me over from the shoes up. “My word boy!’ he exclaimed, “what is wrong with your eyes?”

    “It’s a long story,”I said faking my nervousness.

    “Ah, I see,”nodding his head as if he understood.

    “Well, if you’ll excuse me I need to greet your other sisters Fiora,” and with that he left.


    It was the height of the gala. The slow songs were about to start when the Emperor called for attention.

    “I would just like to say thank you all for making this a great gala, and I would like to give a special thanks to my daughter, June, for turning in a rebel that was hidden among us. Guards seize him,” he said pointing at me and the guards started at me.

    “GRANT RUN!!!” Fiora shouted worry very present. I didn’t listen though, instead I charged at the Emperor. Everyone was moving aside for me. I then let the knife slide from my sleeve and into my hand. I was five feet away from the Emperor when I jump and tackled him. We rolled across the stage and stopped when I stood over him with my foot planted on my chest.

    “Hello, Emperor. I remember you asked about my eyes earlier,” I hissed angrily, “I’ll tell you why. I lived in the Midwest. I lived among rebels. I survived the bombing, but no one else did,” my hands were trembling with hatred, “YOU KILLED MY FRIENDS!!! YOU KILLED MY FAMILY!!!! YOU KILLED MY TOWN!!!! YOU TURNED ME INTO WHAT I AM NOW!!!!! Now you will PAY!!!!“ I screamed as I started to bring knife down when I got hit with a tranquilizer. I don’t even remember hitting the stage floor.





    The Emperor Sentence

    Date: 3/12/22

    Time: 12:00

    Location: The Emperor’s Court

    Mission: Compromised

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    As i just came to canterlot, I sit here and wait, hoping all to go well. my mind wonders whether I may be accepted for who I am. the  fact of being new makes me feel a bit like the fluttershy, but as excited as the pinkypie  . giving a slight sigh,  I must keep my hopes up and stay as calm as applejack , yes i know i got this, i cant wait to explore the new word

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    For the next 10 followers, I will do a pic of your OC or favorite MLP character similar to the one shown here: http://spicy-demon.deviantart.com/art/DragonFlitter-508216409

  11. Congratulations. Seriously.


    My 'haters' have finally won. Their deepest darkest wishes have been fulfilled.


    All my doctor wanted was to check to make sure I didn't have any aneurysms, and what happens?


    A regular cat scan detects something. My doctor made it worse saying it was cancer. A later test then confirmed it wasn't.


    Either way I need surgery. I still don't know what exactly is wrong with me but surgery is the only remedy apparently.


    So my 'haters' finally have their wishes fulfilled. This should make them feel even better. All negative possibilities are running through my head. So I'm sure your all happy about that too. Good for you.


    August 22nd, 2016. The date the future of my life will be determined. I already know what Equestrian Dreamers and my 'haters' are hoping for. Outrageously shocking. At least I left that forum... :unsure:


    So congratulations. Seriously. You've all gotten your wish. I hope your happy now. :/


    I don't even know the recovery time either (assuming I survive that is)


    So go ahead and celebrate. I know you all want to. Either way...


    Have this to remember me by:





    The possible last time you'll ever see me again,


    The Roman Reigns of the internet,



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    anyone want to RP tinker bell, mlp, rwby or something else with me please

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    My channel is called Amyrules4568 and I talk about MLP and do Sonic love stories. I wouldn't mind to write one of MLP fanfics on here. I'm doing both of these things to practice my writing skills so I can be ready when I become a writer. I've grown to love writing so much I would love to make it a job. I'm also here to get more involved with the MLP fandom. Now to answer the questions from my last blog post.

    1. Wildtalon asked if I play Pokémon ORAS or X or Y, yes I played both. I haven't beaten Omega Ruby but I've been meaning to. However, I did beat Pokémon X and I beat it.

    2. Toothpaste Thy asked what I had in mind for my channel. I hope to make Sonic love stories, MLP theory videos, and read my MLP fanfics.

    And that's it. I hope you guys enjoyed my blog post and later today, I'll be posting my fanfics. I'll be seeing you all very soon.

  12. Alright  I just want to  make my stance on the whole "Artists" Debackle, this is not going to single anyone out, and is just more of a response to a growing attitude problem I see on Tumblr, and sometimes even here, and it kinda really needs to stop, and this is for ALLLL forms of Artists, Graphic Artists, web designers, digital artists, if your job is to  make something look beautiful, that requires time, effort and  a lot of practice and talent? It's about that.

    Point blank, when you pay an artist for a request, you are not just buying  a drawing or doodle they threw together,  you are buying their TIME, their effort, and reimbursing them for the wear and tear on their tools. (Even digital art).  It's not just "a silly drawing" It's not something they should just "Do for fun" and they deserve to get paid for.

    Many wonderful artists have given me artwork without charge, and I thank each and every one of them for their  time and effort, however I would NEVER offer to "Show off their work" as "Payment"  because that's stupid, it's like ordering a burger and saying "Oh It's just a burger, I'm not going to pay for it, but I'll tell EVERYONE how GOOD your burger is, if you give me one for free!"

    Point blank, if you beg for free stuff, and then offer to pay in "exposure" especially to someone who makes their daily income OFF COMMISSIONS, then you're a jerk, If you  hire a free-lance web designer and try to pay them  in "exposure" for making your web site, you're a JERK. If you are a business that only offers to give the artist CREDIT for designing your new logo, and no monetary compensation? You're a  /jerk/.

    Artists are doing WORK for you, you PAY people for doing work, don't tell them things like "If you really loved art, you'd do it for the creative process/ self expression/ passion!" Or whatever dumb excuse you want to use that basically boils down to "I want something from you,but I shouldn't have to pay you to do it!"

    If you go "Oh but ANYONE could draw that!"  You're a jerk, you aren't drawing it, and you need someone to be WILLING to draw that for you.

    So the next time you want some art, actually look at the artists prices, (never tell them they are too expensive or not good enough for cash, that makes you a JERK) and  respect them.

    They are hard working, creative people, that deserve monetary recognition for their  effort.

    Respect the artists, LOVE the artists.


  13. Can you believe it?  I've been on here for a whole year now!  I've had some good times, some great times, and some...interesting times.  I've made a whole lot of friends.  Creeped an IRL friend out (with the fact that I have so many online adult friends).  Got two IRL friends to join the site (and then they both left).  And welcomed a whole lot of people.  

    I roleplayed a lot of roleplays, and got myself a Skype to roleplay even more! 

    In this past year:

    -I got 7 of my OC's approved

    -I apped and am now an active player of Starlight Glimmer

    -I discovered making troll accounts and playing the same prank on your friend 4 times still works 

    -I realized going on pony sites the night before your exam is not the same as studying

    -I learned the basics of speaking spanish

    -I learned a bunch of useless information of the Biological Kingdoms and Classification

    -I learned around (Eleven?) different chemical reactions

    -I continued to really hate math

    -I realized that, yes, it is possible to go from a literal fail to a perfect in essay writing (Maybe because roleplaying helped improve my writing skills?)

    -I received a microphone and realized I sound really bad on recording

    -I received a drawing tablet and realize I can actually draw

    -I learned the basics of economics 

    -I learned how to cut a tree (Make an undercut.  Make a back cut.)

    -I learned fishing boats.  I can name 5 types (Gill net, purse seine, longline, trawl, otter trawl)

    -I realized that I have enough drama in my life that I don't need to watch reality TV shows

    -I started reading the news.  

    -I made friends with my basic polar opposite (and we're bff's to date)

    -I don't actually know if this blog counts as a post.  

    -I realized I should stop welcoming new members by pm (nothing good's ever come out of that) and leave somebody else to that job

    -I started watching anime other than Tokyo Mew Mew

    -I listened to Kpop and realized it;s not half bad.

    -I lost all the bets I made this year with my friends.

    -I knit about 7 more lines to my scarf.  The same scarf that I've been knitting for 3 years (granted, I knit an average of 3 lines per year)

    -I realized that the death of a family member isn't always bad (you have to be thankful they lived for that long)

    -I learned that being passive-aggressive sometimes does you good

    -I really like the 'delete' and 'edit' button.

    -My online friends mean as much to me as my IRL friends

    -I have no idea how this list got so long.

    -I learned two things about two members that I probably could have learned if I just read their profile.  Instead, it took about 12 months and a bunch of pm's.

    -There's a lot more than happened this year, but

      (a) I'm too lazy to make this list even longer

      (b) My memory is lapsing right now because I'm desperately trying to study at the same time. 

      (c) Srsly people.  I love to rp.  This isn't really a reason, but I'm just being my random self again.


    Thanks for all the good times, guys~  And let's make many more!  



    Lyi :)  


    Ps.  I am not LYIPH.  I am not a leaf.  Please.  The only way I can pronounce LYIPH is leaf.  

    Pps. Lyipheoryia.  Lie-i-fee-ore-ee-a.  Lyi. Lee.  Don't ask me why my nickname is pronounced differently from my first name.  I don't know.  


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    Following the adversity of exams, I had hoped to have a chance to finally relax and reflect on the direction of my academic career. This was to be suspended however, as today I mourn the loss of my near-lifelong canine friend. She will no longer eagerly run to greet me after I get home from a stressful day, no longer bark incessantly at anything and everything, and no longer lie outside the bedroom doorways watching over her family. It seems everything will be different now. I have no memories of a time when she was not with us.


    When a loved one perishes, we look to reminiscence for comfort. We have only echoes of happier times, but they are nonetheless precious. They mark us, change our lives with uplifting thoughts and emotions. The memories give us a fundamental vitality. It's sad and beautiful.


    It feels like I have hit a low point. I already bore a low mood for a fair while prior, and my attitude to life has been somewhat poor. I have to vow not to sink in sorrow, but to instead somehow seek joy and make it mine. I wish to put my heart into all that I enjoy and all that I pursue. They are not distractions, but things that make me who I am. It's worthy of going all out for.

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    Well, considering everything has changed on this website, I guess I should start a new blog thing.

    anyway, I just wanna talk about life and things. Do you ever feel like your completely useless because you can't do anything as well as other people? I feel that way sometimes. But then I think of the lord of the rings movies and I'm reminded that even the smallest of people can make a difference.

    The purpose of this entry is saying that if I ever do something stupid, tell me and I'll apologize. Also if I offend you, don't stop acknowledging me. I do it all the time by accident.

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    Recent Entries

    Hm... it's been a long time since I've done something as brash as airing my laundry out for others.  Perhaps it's the fact I'm restless at 5am with these thoughts gnawing away at me and the thought of putting this all into writing could help me with some kind of inflection.  I want to say thank you for reading this, I hardly know many of the current people here, I sometimes shy away from posting because I don't see the familiar faces I long to see on the boards.  To give me the time to read what's ahead, takes a tenderness and desire to hear out others you probably will never meet or care for outside of this board.

    I found a woman who changed my life for the better.  She found a way to slowly pull me from my shell.  I felt inspired to rise to every challenge before me, to make myself a better person and to broaden my horizons because of her, for her.  Of all the women I've dated, none have had -such- a dramatic impact on my life!  I truly loved her, part of me forever will.  We've been broken up for almost a year now.  We still keep in touch with each other... but loneliness has started to set in upon my life. I wish to return to the dating scene, but my meager funds are wrapped up in $3200 worth of hospital bills my previous job put me in but didn't cover.  I'm going through a transitional period from one job to another, meaning I've no real money to spend on superficial things such as dating.  This has only made my loneliness even more of a sore spot.

    I've been having feelings about my ex, ones that only come to you when you can no longer distract yourself by talking with friends or strangers and wind up spending the late hours of night awake with regrets, what ifs and false ideas.  I desire her attention, I seek her affection again, despite how I feel her family is being manipulative, using her as a puppet.  I still have so much I never got to say, things that I still wish I had.  Wants I wish to let her know about.  To give her that freedom she's always sought from her family.  She just started a new relationship a few months ago and I have no desire to mingle or interfere, but at times like this, when I'm left with my brooding thoughts I find myself seeking a second chance.

    Soon as I find a way to sleep I will be fine, I'll awake with a clean slate and a better attitude.  But these nights of restlessness have started to become more and more frequent, more and more vivid and the emotions they draw out of me are almost as raw and fresh as the day we were first pulled apart!  I'm conflicted so much with the ceaseless back and forth my mind is going through and I just want some peace of mind.  To put this pain behind me.  Sometimes I still wish I could write as avidly as I used to... so I could better work out my feelings through the written word.  So perhaps I'll try one more time to put everything I've wanted to say to her into one last passage, just so I can say I've said it, even if she'll never see it herself.




    I still remember the days we spent together hanging out at the gym where you approached me first.  I was simply there to lose weight and hopefully tone up when suddenly you started popping up in front of me while I was jogging on the treadmill or lifting weights.  You would ask me how I was, ask what I hoping to accomplish and then brush my arm before saying you'll see me in the Zumba class.  I hesitated, I was just coming down from a relationship and had started to see another woman who couldn't pull the trigger on her at then boyfriend that she no longer got along with.  But whenever I stepped into the gym, you were immediately on my mind and it stayed that way for as long as I was there.  You invited me to go swimming in the pool after class and at first I refused because of my indecision and I could tell it upset you.  Then that day happened... I decided to bring my trunks and I got to see that beautiful face go from complete shock to a beaming smile when I was already in the water before you had even came out!  I believe that was the first moment you swept me off my feet and I felt my heart soar.

    Then came the fourth of July.  It had been four months of us playing coy and not really saying what we wanted to say, but I have to truly thank you for inviting me to the beach to watch the fireworks off the coast.  That day was amazing!  You looked so stunning in that swimsuit and my normally witty mind had turned to a stuttering, blushing mess.  We walked the beach together, we played in the water and held hands as we tried to see how far out we could walk without the waves knocking us over.  I loved the times when one of us slipped and the other wrapped their arms around them to hold each other up.  As night came, we talked in private about what we wanted out of a relationship and sat together watching the fireworks.  That was the night... as we rode home at 1am with you resting your head on my shoulder asleep, you were so peaceful, so lovely.  I had made my decision, you were the one I wanted.  By the end of the week I decided to break it to the other woman that had kept me waiting and it was painful to see how much she truly cared for me, but after all the months I spent showering her with my feelings not being returned... I couldn't bring myself to look back!  You had stepped into my life and I wasn't going to do to you what she did to me.

    It wasn't until September though that I finally asked you to be my girlfriend.  Hahaha, yeah, I really am slow, eh, Honey bee?  I was so nervous I could hardly face you as we sat in the pool together, I had my body facing the wall, not wanting anyone else to see me for fear I'd burst of embarrassment.  You looked so happy when I finally fumbled out the words.  We wound up I guess 'dancing' in the pool?  We'd hold hands and I'd pull you around before changing course or stopping and our faces would come inches from touching and I'd give you a quick wink.  My mind is hazy right now about whether it was in the same night or the following one when we were 'dancing' for the second time and I finally mustered up the courage to kiss you!  You had gotten so use to my teasing that you were genuinely surprised and took several seconds of just staring at me with red cheeks and wide eyes before throwing yourself into me as we made out for the first time right there, regardless of the camera watching or the nearby window.  Your sister really didn't like me for that I feel, but I wouldn't change that moment for the world!  It still stands as one of my favorite memories!

    How about our first Valentine's day?  I asked to take you to the park and I had to fight your sister to convince her it wasn't to take advantage of you!  We had a nice walk and we talked about your family and mine, how they differed and how we'd have to push each other forward to keep from backing down against either of them.  How you wanted to tell me something but wanted to just enjoy the day with me and talk about it the next time.  I then took you to an Italian restaurant, the one I'd taken you too on our first real date!  We wound up waiting forever on service from a snippy waitress because a big Italian family of 14 was sitting next to us.  My order cost more than yours and wasn't even anywhere near as big or filling.  You asked if I wanted a bit of yours and as the proper gentlemen I thanked you for the offer but assured you I was fine with what I had.  I'm pretty sure you knew I was full of it, but didn't want to push the issue if I was trying to be macho. Bwahahaha!

    I never got to hear what that story was though... I never got to know what that baggage was... I feel I should tell you my side of the events though.  The wedding for my friend's sister was coming up and I was invited.  You and I both agreed that your sister wouldn't approve of it since it required us getting a hotel room due to the drive.  As the day started to come, I was told that the people I was riding with weren't going anymore so it would come down to me driving my car or renting one.  Soon as I told my family that, the fighting started.  I was being shouted down and brow beaten into submission.  I insisted it was important only to be told I hardly hung out with them anymore.  Then it turned to your sister.  Joe had mentioned to my mom how your sister wanted to know why I hadn't invited you to go with me so he started pushing on mom so she pushed back, bringing up all the times I had to dance on eggshells around her just to see you.  How she treated me like a predator.  She was pissed at Joe, but after getting off the phone, I was the only one still there so I took the brunt of it.  I argued against her, for your sister for two whole days.  I'm sorry I didn't pick you up for the gym the next time, but I was still battling against her and it wasn't until the third day that I broke.  That I finally had to back down.  That Monday, your sister treated me like a complete scumbag, twisting her head in such ridiculous angles to avoid even seeing me in her peripheral vision.  After all I had done, she didn't even dare to see what happened, just cut me off and did everything she could to keep you and I from having a moment together until it reached a point Joe had to intervene.  Even afterwards it stayed the same, it took me almost a month to apologize to her.  I had hoped we would mend fences but I arrived the next week at the gym to find her corralling you away from me and making her boyfriend talk about finding a new one for you, that he could beat the **** out of if they didn't act right.  It opened my eyes to who she really was and devastated me.  I know you love her as family and I would never seek to change that, but I felt I should do my best to get you away from her, in hopes that you could develop the strength to stand tall by yourself without always bowing to her for approval and permission.  I then...


    I need to stop for now... my hands are shaking. I appreciate your audience,