Unicorn Hyjinx (Ready)

[SirJude]

Roleplay Type: World of Equestria

Name: Hyjinx

Sex: Female

Age: Mare

Species: Unicorn

Eye Color: Yellow, #FFCC00

Coat: Dark Purple, #7A3D99

Mane/Tail: Straight, #000014

One of the main accessories that she rarely takes off is her headdress, with turquoise beads strung together into to a ring around her head. The headdress is held up by four opal hair clips that are also strung up by every two turquoise.

Physique: Average, but she keeps herself in decent running shape but other than that she is rather average.

Residence: Canterlot

Occupation: Thief/Library Assistant

Cutie Mark: A black circle with two white squinting eyes, meant to represent a shadow being.

From humble beginnings, Hyjinx was a little misbehaved. When dealing with others she would try her best to give them a good scare. Throughout her studies she learned of a magic dealing with light and shadows, and her curiosity peaked when she started reading her first book on the subject. She spent most of her time reading these texts, and as such continued her trend of staying away from others. Her first bits of practice with this magic were limited, as the most basic concept was using the shadow of something else to your own control. She could not get it to work on a target that was not willing, but she found that inanimate objects were susceptible to it, as long as she could have enough time to give her spells.

With her work in her studies at full swing, she became rather focused on her strive for intelligence. She would focus on her studies in any down time, but the time spent with others was something that seemed required, she would have the joy of using her new found abilities of light magic to startle and scare those that she deemed deserving a good spook. Throughout her younger years she would always treat her role as that of the wicked witch, so whenever there was play among her friends she would play the villain, for a sense of plot within the story they were enacting. During her times alone she would focus on her studies, reading over the books that she could get her hooves on, studying under candlelight of the various forms of light and shadow. Her visits to the library would often be cut short by those wanting to play, giving her even more reason to scare them during their play sessions.

With the time spent with her parents lacking, it was decided that her and her family would go on a small ‘vacation’, or so she heard. The trip with her parents was as expected as she figured it would have been, left in solitude. The trip in question was only used due to both parents being brought to do business in various regions of the world. It was agreed between them as a family that Hyjinx was old enough, being a Philly, to be safe in this quiet town. It made sense for her to wander the towns, and this experience would be one for the better for her to learn more about the outside world. So with her parents gone for the eve, she took to the streets. It was a rather interesting trip for her to wander the streets, as it felt rather comfortable to be in. The streets seemed rather dead at the time, which was perfectly fine with her, as she imagined just as much as she created. Looking through the closed store windows she would eventually come to the sparkling radiance of the headdress sitting in the window. It was such a glorious adornment of opals and turquoise that it was hard for her to stop looking at it. With her studies in full swing, her ability to move things through the shadows proved most useful, and looking at how populated the streets were, she had no problem for taking it with her own. She took a stance and began to concentrate. Within a few minutes she had the object encased in shadows, and with a few more minutes she had managed to move the object onto her head. Her flank started to glow, and a black face adjourned with skewed eyes appeared on her flank.

After walking back to the place they were staying, her mother had come to ask “Hyjinx, where did you get that beautiful headdress?”

She simply turned to her mother and said “Someone was nice enough to give it to me. They were such an intelligent individual, it was just too hard to deny such a gift.”

History:

Hyjinx’s life started in Canterlot, with her father and mother still alive to this day. Both of her parents were rather busy folk, so Hyjinx spent little time with them. Hyjinx had a decent life with her family, despite the lack of communication. With the lack of communication in the household, each member became fairly self-sufficient. Going through school was an interesting time, as most of the things that she had learned were from sources of fiction, or through the actions of others.

There was no proper teaching of family values or fairness taught to her when she was young, so she grew up with the mentality of getting whatever she wanted however she wanted. As such her sense of judgement became warped rather quickly, and with her actions coming off as more of a snotty nature, most people just didn't like her. She saw no reason to take things of major importance as most of the things that she wanted were activities to do at that age, such as reading.

Her efforts of shadow Magic stemmed from a book of light magic, and as such she needs to balance the aspects of light and shadow to understand the importance of one aspect. So her delving into the ideas of shadow magic is only limited by her ability to learn light magic alongside that. The aspect of light is the idea of Illusions, creating images of light to give the idea that something was there.

When looking into the magic of shadow and light, she had stumbled upon the idea of the Dark Magics, similar to that of the Alicorns of the land, and King Sombra. This form of power seemed like it would benefit her, and through the legends she has read has granted her a new found passion to become a powerful Unicorn. The only downfall is that the only thing she has found has only detailed the war that he had caused, and nothing yet on the Colt himself.

Her life in Canterlot to this day is lived in research and reading, and when her time wasn't focused on that it was used to help the local library, to keep it organized with the unruly sort that kept disorganizing her work. The tales told of King Sombra were stories that she wanted to work towards, so she searched for the various tales told of the Tyrant King.

With the future ahead of her, she will rely on her skills as a thief to get the things that she wants without worry. When dealing with her job as a thief, she focuses on smaller businesses and long nights, as her form of theft relies heavily on having enough time to finish her spells.

Character Summary:

Hyjinx is a very confident Mare. She specializes in a certain kind of magic, and due to this fact she feels more proud of herself when comparing her ideals to others. If her abilities ever come into question she will surely show them off. She believes in her abilities as a thief, and has no reason to think anypony knows about what she does in her spare time.

Hyjinx was a pony that has developed a certain love for herself. When given the option she will take that which puts her in the better position. This self-confidence is also what leads her to continue her ideals as a thief, and always wanting more and more to add into her repertoire.

Hyjinx has two motivations in life: her first is to master her shadow magic. She wants to master this kind of magic as it would allow her to do whatever she wanted to in the world, and as long as another equally powerful, or more powerful being wasn't around. Then no one could stop her. She wishes to become a powerful unicorn in order to do whatever she wishes in life. The other is learning the origins of Dark Magic. The idea behind the power of Dark Magic gives her an idea of what she could work towards when achieving her own magic. She wishes to be a powerful unicorn and the strength behind King Sombra gives her the strength to continue through her studies.

As a pony, Hyjinx is intelligent, Arrogant, and overconfident. There is a stride to her step that gives off a step of elegance, as her taste in anything is rather refined. There is a day in her mind in which she wishes to be the dark princess walking down the aisle, looming down over her subjects in a beautiful dress, ordering them all to give her things and stuff of theirs because she wishes to have everyone’s things and stuff. This is an image in her dreams and would one day like to achieve such power.

During her times of relaxation, Hyjinx would spend her time reading fiction. There wasn't too much that could peak her interests than a good novel. It was a way for her imagination to soar, giving her new ideas and even greater aspiration to practice her abilities in light magic to create illusions.

Specific Character Notes:

Dark Magic

Hyjinx's admiration of Dark Magic and the tales of King Sombra are a motivating tool to her success in life, by no means is she going to look for the secrets of dark magic or practicing it. It is merely a story that she enjoys and the idea behind conquest and the like. She sticks to her own kinds of magic, and wants to learn all she can about it and practice it to it's fullest potential.

Shadow Magic:

The Shadow magic is nothing more than a stylistic choice of magic. It allows her to travel through the shadows as a form of transportation for her and objects that she is trying to take. It takes a few minutes to put something that she is trying to take into the shadows, and under no obligation is she able to put anything not willing to the effects of the magic into the shadows. As such other ponies will not be able to be put into the magic, nor will Hyjinx ever try to put ponies into the shadows, as she is fully aware that the magic that she possesses is not controlling or an evil form of magic, just for the ponies who prefer the night to the Day.

A strong weakness to the Shadow magic is Light magic, as such she will be knocked out of her shadow transportation if her shadow is hit with beams of light, or any styles of her magic would be easily diffused with light.

[[Edited for the suggestions made, Edited again for further comments and clarifications ]]

[RainbowDaringDash]

Hello, great OC, i can only say one thing here

I dont think that thieves are allowed in WoE, other then that their is nothing i can suggest.

Best of luck

[Mojo]

Hi there!

I have to agree with RDD's comments, I'm not sure if a 'thief' is allowed in WOE. Otherwise, this app looks very solid! All of the required fields are filled and it's very well written. The only questionable part of this app is the 'thief' part, I will seek a 'second opinion' from a higher ranking RPH on this.

[SirJude]

Hello, great OC, i can only say one thing here

I dont think that thieves are allowed in WoE, other then that their is nothing i can suggest.

Best of luck

Hi there!

I have to agree with RDD's comments, I'm not sure if a 'thief' is allowed in WOE. Otherwise, this app looks very solid! All of the required fields are filled and it's very well written. The only questionable part of this app is the 'thief' part, I will seek a 'second opinion' from a higher ranking RPH on this.

Alright, I was curious as to whether or not that would be allowed. My reasoning for thinking it would be is in relations to the comics, specifically #21 and #22 of the main MLP:FiM Series where Trixie, AppleJack, Fluttershy and some of the kids are stopping a Diamond thief, as they've been framed for her crimes. If it's not allowed I can change but but it'll need a bit of tweaking to go with the second idea I had for her.

[Halide]

I'mma step in cuz I don't often do that and I like what you're trying to do here.

Your history section is a little on the weak side; but so far it seems fairly acceptable. So long as her parents didn't intentionally neglect her or start mistreating her out of nowhere, the fact that they simply didn't have much time for her should remain reasonably acceptable.

That said, her occupation is definitely toeing a few lines. Luckily, you don't try to make this character steal everything they need, nor do you have them rob people violently. This character seems to mostly just be the quiet type that slips in and grabs a few quick valuables, rather than some grandiose villain or noisome robber. As such, I am going to say that, given the quiet and peacable nature of this character's larceny, assisted with her magical talents, it should be acceptable.

Now, senior staff may or may not agree with me, but I'll move this up for SRP review regardless.

[SirJude]

I'mma step in cuz I don't often do that and I like what you're trying to do here.

Your history section is a little on the weak side; but so far it seems fairly acceptable. So long as her parents didn't intentionally neglect her or start mistreating her out of nowhere, the fact that they simply didn't have much time for her should remain reasonably acceptable.

That said, her occupation is definitely toeing a few lines. Luckily, you don't try to make this character steal everything they need, nor do you have them rob people violently. This character seems to mostly just be the quiet type that slips in and grabs a few quick valuables, rather than some grandiose villain or noisome robber. As such, I am going to say that, given the quiet and peacable nature of this character's larceny, assisted with her magical talents, it should be acceptable.

Now, senior staff may or may not agree with me, but I'll move this up for SRP review regardless.

You hit the head on every nail there. I apologize for the dry History section, I was looking over how I wrote the cutie mark story and for the most part the History would've half been what I put there and half of what I wrote for the cutie mark story just integrated into a properly woven story. I didn't want to repeat myself so I left it out of that section. I can try writing that if it's needed however.

Concerning the parents, they are just busy workers. The relations with her parents are fine, it's just more of an acquaintance relationship rather than the normal family relationship due to the jobs that they held.

Thank you for the recommendation!

[QuickLime]

I'v been waiting for her to be made real! =D Good luck with your app!

[starswirlthebearded]

Alright, so I'm going to take it upon myself to give input, not only as a Senior Helpstaffer but also as an owner of a thief in WoE myself.

So... Without further adieu...

- All cutie marks must be gotten before marehood. This is a non-negotiable condition.

- [less of a critique more curiosity...] " Her first bits of practice with this magic were limited, as the most basic concept was using the shadow of something else to your own control. She could not get it to work on a target that was not willing, but she found that inanimate objects were susceptible to it, as long as she could have enough time to give her spells." I find this curious. I'd like to know more of what you mean, since people don't usually control their own shadows. This honestly makes me think of Shikamaru of Naruto. Personally I'd see this as outside of the scope of the magic we are presenting as it would lend to exerting some form of control over other characters which is not allowed at all [it falls under godmodding]. If it is controlling shadows in terms of manipulation of their shape and size (as should be possible with manipulation of light) that is different. Please clarify this point. (though from later in the CM story the description of use reminds me a lot of Ebon from Static Shock)... I'd just like to know more about this "shadow control" magic.

-Dark magic is not limited to only alicorns. And as such you are referencing specific characters (the princesses). Keep in mind the first time Twilight uses it she was still a unicorn (though a rather gifted one). Also Sombra was a unicorn ruler, not an alicorn. On that note however, I would not be willing to allow just any character to use such magic in World of Equestria. As it seems either high level magic, or highly indicative of their character. In the case of the former I'd say the character is overpowered, in the case of the latter I'd say that the spirit of the character probably does not align with World of Equestria (but would probably fit either way in Canterlot Chronicles)

I personally have no issues with the idea of thieves in WoE, however, the spirit of this one focusing on dark magic which carries with it malice is something rather out of place in that area. Other than that... Your character shows another problem... playability. What I mean by this is, having characters whom are distant from others is hard to make use of in a social Roleplay like World of Equestria which mainly focuses on slice of life character interaction.

The last thing is proofreading. Please proofread this over, there were several spelling and grammatical errors. Just give it a look over and make sure everything is spelled right and there are no grammatical oddities.

If you have any questions or comments just reply back here and I'll try and help you out to the best of my ability to get this character accepted into either WoE (which will take some changes) or CC (which honestly would only probably take converting it into the proper format and some proofreading)

[SirJude]

Alright, so I'm going to take it upon myself to give input, not only as a Senior Helpstaffer but also as an owner of a thief in WoE myself.

So... Without further adieu...

- All cutie marks must be gotten before marehood. This is a non-negotiable condition.

- [less of a critique more curiosity...] " Her first bits of practice with this magic were limited, as the most basic concept was using the shadow of something else to your own control. She could not get it to work on a target that was not willing, but she found that inanimate objects were susceptible to it, as long as she could have enough time to give her spells." I find this curious. I'd like to know more of what you mean, since people don't usually control their own shadows. This honestly makes me think of Shikamaru of Naruto. Personally I'd see this as outside of the scope of the magic we are presenting as it would lend to exerting some form of control over other characters which is not allowed at all [it falls under godmodding]. If it is controlling shadows in terms of manipulation of their shape and size (as should be possible with manipulation of light) that is different. Please clarify this point. (though from later in the CM story the description of use reminds me a lot of Ebon from Static Shock)... I'd just like to know more about this "shadow control" magic.

-Dark magic is not limited to only alicorns. And as such you are referencing specific characters (the princesses). Keep in mind the first time Twilight uses it she was still a unicorn (though a rather gifted one). Also Sombra was a unicorn ruler, not an alicorn. On that note however, I would not be willing to allow just any character to use such magic in World of Equestria. As it seems either high level magic, or highly indicative of their character. In the case of the former I'd say the character is overpowered, in the case of the latter I'd say that the spirit of the character probably does not align with World of Equestria (but would probably fit either way in Canterlot Chronicles)

I personally have no issues with the idea of thieves in WoE, however, the spirit of this one focusing on dark magic which carries with it malice is something rather out of place in that area. Other than that... Your character shows another problem... playability. What I mean by this is, having characters whom are distant from others is hard to make use of in a social Roleplay like World of Equestria which mainly focuses on slice of life character interaction.

The last thing is proofreading. Please proofread this over, there were several spelling and grammatical errors. Just give it a look over and make sure everything is spelled right and there are no grammatical oddities.

If you have any questions or comments just reply back here and I'll try and help you out to the best of my ability to get this character accepted into either WoE (which will take some changes) or CC (which honestly would only probably take converting it into the proper format and some proofreading)

Thank you very much for the assistance. I will put my reasoning for anything in the order that you have pointed them out.

- Agreed, I will fix the story so that it happened earlier in her life.

- I don't know much about Static Shock, so my research on Ebon might be a bit quick handed. Going off of the DC Animated Universe Wiki, half of what the abilities were in that description were what I thought of when it came to the "Shadow Control". The main idea of it was giving a more stylized form of transportation for her. I understand the importance of controlling the power of characters and I agree with you that the control over others shadows is too much power for one individual. As such I wasn't going to include the control of other pony's shadows. The main idea of it was moving objects and herself through the shadows, with no control over anything that she couldn't connect with. As such most people wouldn't want to have themselves being controlled and would fight off any attempts at her even doing so as it requires a willing target, aka the one using a magic or something that does not exert any will or mind. With larger objects would come a longer time to transport it, smaller objects a shorter time.

- I can agree to her not having access to dark magic, as it is a rather strong form of magic and I can see her abilities not being able to control/cast that power of magic. The main idea that I had for that was the stories behind what it did, giving her ideas to aspire to, and as a motivator to continue her studies in magic. To aspire goals that have never been seen before.

- Concerning playability, I could swap out the more inwardly focused bookwork to something along the lines of Gilda, but focused on Intelligence rather than Strength . A rather rude individual who is confident in her own abilities with a bit of a temper with those that she finds annoying. She would be able to talk to those that she finds intellectual without too much worry but would have a harder time staying calm with those that ask stupid questions.

- My apologies on the grammar. I will look over it again and see what I've missed. If I miss anything more I may have to ask you for help, as I haven't taken a proper literature class or English class in a long time, so my ability to proofread grammatical errors has dwindled greatly.

[SirJude]

Alright, I went over the writing and I believe I've hit all the grammatical and spelling errors. I feel as though the minute spelling differences in Canada may still be in there and I apologize for that. I have also made changes to the story and interests to make sure it's more clear that she does not have access to Dark Magic, and that it is more of a historical interest and motivator than a pure goal to master the Dark Arts.

Should I make sure that the clarity of the shadow control is in there as well? With your curiosity on the subject I feel as though the way I originally wrote it may come off as overstating her abilities as a unicorn.

[starswirlthebearded]

Hey again!

Sorry it took so long to look at this again. First off, the grammar is improved and most of the spelling errors I saw are no longer present, so good work on that front.

So after discussing it extensively with the other RPH, we have deemed this shadow control magic to be a viable form of magic. However, you must also understand the limitations and drawbacks of this magic (eg light disrupting it). No magic is absolute. And so long as you aren't controlling characters, and it is just moving things and herself (and maybe moving other ponies whom are willing (or OK with being forcibly moved through shadows determined in OoC) it should be fine!

I asked for clarification because of how you phrased it and presented it, so some elaboration might be welcome, but always remember too much and it could seem like it's OP or outside of the realm, so be careful on how you expand it, and ensure that it is in key with the rest of the app (don't take an entire portion of the app to just talk about the magic in other words)...

Also I fear I was unclear with my point about dark magic... Good ponies controlling dark magic is certainly OP. All other ponies controlling it would be outside the realm of World of Equestria (but would be perfectly fine in CC). Being able to use dark magic is something that wouldn't be allowable. Being interested would. It is a dangerous line to dance, but you have to understand the difference. Aspiring to use it though might not be so welcome. Especially since as we have seen, dark magic is no more powerful than light magic. Tread lightly with this aspect of your character.

I look forward to seeing your developments with it

[SirJude]

Hey again!

Sorry it took so long to look at this again. First off, the grammar is improved and most of the spelling errors I saw are no longer present, so good work on that front.

So after discussing it extensively with the other RPH, we have deemed this shadow control magic to be a viable form of magic. However, you must also understand the limitations and drawbacks of this magic (eg light disrupting it). No magic is absolute. And so long as you aren't controlling characters, and it is just moving things and herself (and maybe moving other ponies whom are willing (or OK with being forcibly moved through shadows determined in OoC) it should be fine!

I asked for clarification because of how you phrased it and presented it, so some elaboration might be welcome, but always remember too much and it could seem like it's OP or outside of the realm, so be careful on how you expand it, and ensure that it is in key with the rest of the app (don't take an entire portion of the app to just talk about the magic in other words)...

Also I fear I was unclear with my point about dark magic... Good ponies controlling dark magic is certainly OP. All other ponies controlling it would be outside the realm of World of Equestria (but would be perfectly fine in CC). Being able to use dark magic is something that wouldn't be allowable. Being interested would. It is a dangerous line to dance, but you have to understand the difference. Aspiring to use it though might not be so welcome. Especially since as we have seen, dark magic is no more powerful than light magic. Tread lightly with this aspect of your character.

I look forward to seeing your developments with it

Thank you very much for the assistance.

I apologize if the idea was a bit in left field that you had to have a pretty large discussion on it though. I'm glad that we're on the same page on that idea. The idea of having light dispel it would actually be more interesting so I'll gladly run with that. I can just imagine someone flashing a beam of light on the shadow she's travelling through and her rolling out of it and tripping. It'll be very fun to try out.

I will make sure to make a small note on that. Changing the story in the app might be a little annoying on my part so I'll make sure to write out the wording properly in an small section dedicated to it. It would need to be clarified pretty well I feel if people aren't familiar with concepts in other popular culture.

That is much clearer on the Dark Magic. Thank you for the clarification. My original intent was to give her an interest in it, so I'm glad that's still available. I guess I didn't word my app very well in that part. I'll have to work on that. Her love of fiction would make more sense to be purely as an interest instead of something she would learn. Going with her narcissism it would make more sense for her to just be proud of the magic she can do and keep working on what's special to her instead of even trying to learn something different from her. So I should've phrased it in a way that she saw it as inspirational that someone got really far in a method that he was known for. It would make a lot more sense character wise.

Have a great week! And thank you very much for your help Starswirl

[SirJude]

Alright then, I have added the small notes section to clarify the more vague points in my writing. I think i added everything needed to hit the points of clarification, once again thank you for all the help in editing my application RP Helpers and Senior RP helpers!

[Gerrard]

This is looking good, up to swirly to put the final stamp on it though.

[starswirlthebearded]

Welp! All looks good from here. Enjoy our game