Sailu Posted October 14, 2014 Report Share Posted October 14, 2014 so i'm a 25 yr old colt, without even a look from any mares.(but apperently i'm a 7-10) i'm not a hermit per-se i'm outgoing, as well as a pretty shy at first *mostly because of my stutter* but out side of that i've got a kind heart (perhaps to big at times, putting others head of my own well being) but as of late i'm just not caring, just focusing on me for the moment. if it happens it happens if not well i'd guess i'm just to old for that "magic spark in a relationship" (feeling that way as of late)anyone else have a similar experience?*mods if this is more blog Material then post either move or delete* Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sondash145 Posted October 15, 2014 Report Share Posted October 15, 2014 So I'm almost 13 and I can see why I don't, but I don't see why no filly has ever taken a special interest to me. First of all, people say I'm nice, handsome, and smart. Second, fillies outnumber colts at our school by about one and a fifth to one, and not one of them has had so much as a long conversation with me. I can see why, though, with my shyness, constantly cracking voice, not knowing what to say, and I don't get a chance to hang out with them very often. I do, however have a filly as a friend, so who knows what'll happen in the future?Thanks for letting me talk abou this. Sorry if that's not what you wanted in the reply section. I just felt like I needed to let it out of my system. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
WhiteLightning18 Posted October 15, 2014 Report Share Posted October 15, 2014 Nope. Turned 18 last August, and although I'm not a total loner in terms of going out and all that (I have a group of friends I hang out with or go out with at times) I have never met anyone who had mutual feelings. That said, I've had maybe just a handful of crushes, none of which worked out because I either found out indirectly they already had someone, weren't interested or interested in someone else, or I was too shy and nervous to ever approach them. No hard feelings in there, just my bad luck really. x3My shyness is the most of my problems really. In general I feel like I'm a pretty nice person, but I also know I have my shortcomings. For example I'm quite the pessimist, and I tend to talk too much. And I tend to be pretty modest about myself, sometimes to the point of putting myself below others."magic spark in a relationship" I share this with you in a way.. Although I don't have any female friends (save one on Skype that I'm not close to anyway), and I've had as said, a handful of crushes, but I've never experienced this 'spark' people seem to get when they meet the right person. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sailu Posted October 15, 2014 Author Report Share Posted October 15, 2014 i've just come to accept the fact of yes i care/want a somepony in my life, but at the same time i feel like its not gonna happen to me at this point (to the point of just straight up hating seeing couples together and or my friends in relationships) while i'm just alone. its not like i don't try i do i'm not desperate for it i'm just living, working, playing music, etc just being me but what ever Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
WhiteLightning18 Posted October 15, 2014 Report Share Posted October 15, 2014 i've just come to accept the fact of yes i care/want a somepony in my life, but at the same time i feel like its not gonna happen to me at this point (to the point of just straight up hating seeing couples together and or my friends in relationships) while i'm just alone. its not like i don't try i do i'm not desperate for it i'm just living, working, playing music, etc just being me but what everTry to keep yourself from the whole hating thing. Jealousy is completely understandable but let it sit for too long and it'll make you a cold, cold person. I've been there a couple months ago; believe me, you don't wanna be. I get the way you look at it though. I'd love to at least get a shot with someone, but I feel like it just isn't going to happen anytime soon. Maybe it'll even happen too late, I don't know. It's all hoping for the best and speculating really. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sailu Posted October 15, 2014 Author Report Share Posted October 15, 2014 well hate is to strong a work seriously irritated/annoyed is a better term but yeah i understand, its just so funny how the whole *oh you'll get a girlfriend in highschool or at least someone will like you* thing hahaha...i'm 24 (25 in less then two months) and not a one still...WOW*i mean sure i have had "looks" at me but they are not what i'd want as relationship status lol Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
WhiteLightning18 Posted October 15, 2014 Report Share Posted October 15, 2014 well hate is to strong a work seriously irritated/annoyed is a better term but yeah i understand, its just so funny how the whole *oh you'll get a girlfriend in highschool or at least someone will like you* thing hahaha...i'm 24 (25 in less then two months) and not a one still...WOW*i mean sure i have had "looks" at me but they are not what i'd want as relationship status lolI understand. I tend to get annoyed at people telling me 'oh you'll meet one in college and stuff' as well. In fact, I am in college (or at least, doing an education which will get me a bachelor's degree) and I'm in second year now, but like you I just don't see it happening soon. I secretly hope a little it does of course. ^^ Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sailu Posted October 15, 2014 Author Report Share Posted October 15, 2014 i have not though of going to college at this point in time because i have no idea what'd id want to do and i don't want to waste money on an AA or something dumb like that...although being 25...(and still feeling like i'm 17) i'm running out of time for EVERYTHING.... :'( Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Solaria Posted October 15, 2014 Report Share Posted October 15, 2014 Dating sites are a wonderful invention. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
WhiteLightning18 Posted October 15, 2014 Report Share Posted October 15, 2014 Dating sites are a wonderful invention.Can't argue with that. But it's up to the person in question if he or she sees anything in dating using such websites. I recommend it to Sailu though, even if it is just to try it out. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sailu Posted October 15, 2014 Author Report Share Posted October 15, 2014 NOPE my dad tried and succeeded and marry'ed a TOTAL C**T i know that is like 50/100 so i'll just take face to face or forever alone lol but i may IF i can find the RIGHT person Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Solaria Posted October 15, 2014 Report Share Posted October 15, 2014 Uh... you realize the website didn't force your father into marriage right? You just have to go in knowing exactly what it is you're about to do, but the upside is knowing the people on there with you are also looking for relationships.Either way, it's definitely harder to meet people once school is done. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sondash145 Posted October 15, 2014 Report Share Posted October 15, 2014 Ok, you KNOW you're not gonna get a special some pony for a while if your best friend who's just like you in almost every way* has one and you don't. Does anyone actually have some good advice for a 13 year old who's trying his best to find his way in the world of dating.* by "in almost every way" I meant the only differences are that he's shorter, has lighter hair, and has a little chub on his cheeks. And Im talking about personality, too. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
GhostGirl Posted October 16, 2014 Report Share Posted October 16, 2014 Coupla things here. Dio, our fearless leader? He was 25 when we started dating. I'm his first serious girlfriend. When I started making advances, he was at that "I don't know if it's ever gonna happen, but whatever" point. While you shouldn't be all desperate out there trying to find a girlfriend all the time, there is no totally hopeless situation on the dating front if you are interested in dating. There are even 80 year olds who go out dating and manage to settle down into a new relationship at that point in their life.Second thing, at 13 a lot of girls (and some guys, too) are kind of giggly and hopeless romantic about the idea of meeting a guy and falling in love, but they're also, if developing in a healthy manner, not ready for a relationship at all. Also you have all of high school and lots of college and the rest of your life (80-somethings!) to meet someone.I think that's really all I have to say. Basically don't try to force it and don't begrudge others their happiness. If it happens, let it happen, but don't get super duper upset if it doesn't. While having a partner is nice, it's not vital to a happy life. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sondash145 Posted October 17, 2014 Report Share Posted October 17, 2014 I'm just asking if it's OK is all, and if it is, is there anything I an do about it that creates positive results. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sondash145 Posted October 17, 2014 Report Share Posted October 17, 2014 Plus I go to a school where everyone is just " if I could be in a relationship with _____, that would be nice," you know how that goes? Plus I go to a private school, so it may be different than normal. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sondash145 Posted October 17, 2014 Report Share Posted October 17, 2014 Also, I agree that forcing it would be a bad idea, not because it would most likely be rushed, but it would make you seem desperate.It's just that, I've tried almost everything without making it seem obvious, and I do this to every filly I get a chance to talk to, but the ones who might be interested are oblivious, and the ones who get the point, aren't, so I'm kind of stuck in a corner here, if that makes any sense. I'm not going anywhere, to the point that literally no filly has given me a " look" before. So either I'm unimportant in the social world of my school, or I'm not looking in the right places. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ChildOfTheLight Posted October 17, 2014 Report Share Posted October 17, 2014 I'm a firm believer in that there's someone out there for everyone. Maybe you just haven't met the right person ye? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
GhostGirl Posted October 17, 2014 Report Share Posted October 17, 2014 There is nothing abnormal about not having anyone be interested in you yet when you're still just 13 years old. That's perfectly 100% normal. Just relax. Don't jump into trying to get romantic with every girl you meet the second you meet them, either. That more than likely chases them off. Treat them like you would anyone else and just kinda get to know them and be their friend first. Even if they still don't get romantic with you, hey, you made a new friend. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sondash145 Posted October 18, 2014 Report Share Posted October 18, 2014 I've done that once, but we don't hang out much. Usually just in my free time after school do I even get the chance to. Also with the getting romantic at first glance chases them off thing, I don't do that. I do what you recommended. Some fillies did become my friend, but most of them move away or change schools, and that really limits my time with them. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
GhostGirl Posted October 18, 2014 Report Share Posted October 18, 2014 And that's a thing that happens when you're young. All things are transient. Nothing stays the same.Just bear in mind that at 13, you still have a good 70+ years of life left to spend interacting with people. I wouldn't focus on romantic interactions. Focus on friends more. It's a happier lifestyle. If you focus on the romantic interactions, when a romantic relationship rolls around you'll find it hard to balance time between the object of your affection and your friends. Focus on friendship first, and just, y'know, try not to worry too much about finding someone. 13 is very young to think you've lost all hope in the world of dating. 80 somethings, after all. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sondash145 Posted October 18, 2014 Report Share Posted October 18, 2014 No offense, but you're telling me things I'm already doing. As you said, focus more on friends. That's what I'm doing, with romance as a small side mission. My weirdness and my behavioral disorder make me skip over things that are important. So, as I said, my friend, who is a filly, I don't get to see her unless it's in my free time after school, but if I wanted to, I could meet her before school and on the weekends. Also, if you think getting her as a friend before "my special somepony" is "cheap" or whatever, I just now got a "look" from her, sooooo, yeah. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
GhostGirl Posted October 18, 2014 Report Share Posted October 18, 2014 Woah, sorry. This is the internet dude, and things get misconstrued all the time when all you have to go off of is text. The way you were wording it made it sound, to me, like romance was all you were focused on. I did not mean to offend you.Also, I didn't intend for you to think that I'm saying friendship before a romantic relationship is "cheap." The way I view things is the exact opposite of that. Misunderstandings happen. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sondash145 Posted October 19, 2014 Report Share Posted October 19, 2014 It's my fault. My thoughts race and after one thought is put into my head it's instantly replaced by another.Curse you ADHD! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
InSaNiTyCaT Posted October 19, 2014 Report Share Posted October 19, 2014 Just let it happen. Your doing better than most kids! Just don't be jealous, sometimes there are just THOSE boys who get all the girls!And girls who get all the boys. Let it go smoothly and just relax around girls, don't try to be manly and cocky just laugh and have a joke.I personally have had looks and have been asked out, I rejected them all. Unfortunately there was this one boy I should have said yes to!Anyway that's how it is, personality over looks. Jut relax and it will come! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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