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Ciraxis

The Visits (Open)

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The mare nodded her head as the strange unicorn spoke. “They believe this poor fellow is an hedge mage, driven made by his peers, or possibly his failures, and after living alone in darkness has decided to ‘get back’ at his tormentors.” Good gravy. She could almost picture this strange fellow, lurking in his underground lair. Clutching his hooves together as he let out an deafening ‘muahahaha’, knowing that soon his foes would 'rue' the day they ignored his greatness, possibly in the form of song. The unicorn would be very shaggy and have evil, beady little eyes. Just like the odd unicorn her Swift Squall had invited into his stately manor. He couldn't be the mage. The brothers would have detected him if he went topside.  And besides, what were the chances? "We are going to make sure he does not engage in anything that would be harmful for his targets or himself, and make sure he gets the right bit of help." The Whinnychester brothers knew what they were doing!
 
Ninjas? Fire Walker could not help but smirk. "I'm sure we just simply call them assassins. I doubt there ever were ponies who ran around in full black hoofy pajamas actually existed. Normally, you would have an killer who simply blended into the background. Thankfully, we live in an enlightened times, where ponies can discuss their problems with others, and if they could afford an hired blade, they could afford to pay for an lawyer or moderator." She loved her dear, sweet Swift Squall, but he must have been born in the wrong century. He might have done better in pre-Celestia times. When magic ran wild and monsters roamed the land, not fearful of the shambling little hovels of 'civilization' the ponies kept themselves hidden in. These poor folk would need heroes! Like an brave knight, an pious healer, an clever thief and an clever wizard. Or were those the characters in her brother's role-playing game they made her play when she was young?
 
She nodded her head as Swift spoke, "I believe those were all accounted for." She had heard about a few of these before. "If I am thinking of the same pony that you are talking about, the university one was a poor chap who enjoyed being a student so much, he decided never to leave and ended up living in what they originally believed was an old, walled off sub-basement.  This is a bit different, this is...um. Swift?", her beloved was promptly jumped by strangers. She was not sure what was going on. Even odder, she could not even see what was happening to the unicorn as he quickly disappeared into a rather large cloud of smoke? It did not smell like smoke. Even before she could even think to react, it was all over. And also, possibly, very silly. Was that pillows they wielded? Once the cloud had settled, she quickly made her way over to her colt-friend to make sure he was ok.
 
"Swift...Dear...What just happened?", she glanced down at him with an worried look on her face.
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A hedge mage? Now he hadn't seen one of those in years! He supposed, Starswirl aside, there had been that fellow from Scorpan's kingdom. Discord never really liked him, his methods far too fantastic even for a chaos spirit. The thought was amusing, how easily a unicorn's magical prowess could go and corrupted them. An earth pony too could go mad with power, as would a Pegasus. It was a dangerous sort of egotism that got him in trouble in the first place. Though he liked to think of it as more of a fluke. He had been caught with his guard down because the sisters dares attacked without calling out their attacks! Quote rude when it came to warfare. It was a sport after all, guarded with rules broken often...

Well that is a terrible example anyway.

 

The uh -- grey old pony stood as the mare finished up her speech, the shadows set free, inconveniencing the lot, oh well particularly Swift Squall. To keep up with pretenses the old unicorn stepped back, tucking his hoof against his chest. He watched as the pajama wearing shadows took steps to challenge the unicorn to hooficuffs. After a brawl and rather colorful, foal-unsafe language, it seems Squall was spat out like a chewed up, wet newspaper. The shadows scattered thereafter, the Longma giving chase quickly.

 

"I suppose somepony spoke too soon." He chuckled, though his distraction led to a pillow clipping him off the side of his head.

The old pony furrowed his brows and snorted, the raccoon riding his head laughing and pointing, only for him to be clipped off the unicorn by a wayward pillow. It seemed the pink pajama wearing shadows and half sized one took to challenge the elder. It seemed the shadows would attempt to earn fake points by expertly dropping down to beat the literal stuffing from the weapons in use. The red one being chased by Xiêyè would attempt to ambush him with a long body pillow, for most featherysplosion. The "ninjas" in question were easy to defeat for upon their chests they had a stamp that had the shape of a head with a qilin horn and ram horn. Hitting this spot would defeat them instantaneously! Oh the spirit couldn't help but sign his work!

 

Manifesting a foam javelin he would poise to guard himself against the pillow wielding pair. "Avast!" No, wrong call sigh, but too late: the old pony was charging!

 

The old, grey unicorn charged his shadow, but the pink ninja was quick and leapt away, causing Strife to screeech to a halt, the raccoon being sent off into the pint sized nin-pony. His furry little head would bonk into the shadow's chest, causing it great dishonor! It clutched itself in the struck spot and dramatically staggered backwards before erupting into a poof of feathers. That was one down! But that did not mean the mare was safe in her space, checking on the stallion... for above in the rafters her opponent, pillow in hoof, was about to pounce…
 

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"Oh? So it's straightforward matter of a revenge? Insane or not this hedge mage does not beat around the bush! Haha!" Swift said. "I-I am sorry." he added after a second of awkward silence.

 

"Ughhhh...I believe.....that I was ninjed Fire." noblepony groaned further, while trying to pick himself together. He only succeeded with rolling himself on the back. "This...this is the worst. What was in those pillows? Stymphalian Birds feathers?" Squall asked.

 

Swift could only sigh as Xiêyè gave chase to one of the 'ninjas' while Strife engaged another. "Oh and now elders attack. And I tough I couldn't look more bad." he muttered still laying down. But then , swordstallion spotted a slight movement near the ceiling. "Hmm what...?" he mused, before the prowling figure jumped down to attack!

 

"Moto!" swordpony cried, before pushing her out of the harms way with his magic. However the price of sparing his love from sneak attack was getting smacked straight in the face with a pillow. Again. "Ack!" young stallion yelped in surprise just as before. Swift's assailant blinked - apparently as astonished as unicorn himself - before shrugging and hitting the sprawled Count few more times and dispreading yet again.

"Eeeeaaahahharruurrahhfrozenpeas." Squall said eloquently when the foe was gone.

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Xiêyè flew down the hall quickly, flying straight into the attack from his red ninja. He gave a shout in surprise, flipping end over end for a few moments before he regained his balance and shot back towards Red. 

 

Red went for another swing, Xiêyè going into a spin and slicing the pillow in half. The cloud of feathers did nothing to stop his spin as he continued on and sliced him right down the middle, which apparently only added to the cloud. At least the ninja was gone. The Longma gave a huff to blow a feather off that had settled on his nose, sheathing his blades as he headed back to the others. 

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Fire Walker really did not need this. At least not this very moment. She had slept in a little, and while it was slowly drifting away, remnants of an migraine still lingered in her brain. Swift’s very special and extra fancy multi faucet shower helped a good deal. She just hoped nobody heard her surprised yelp after she stood in the wrong spot. An R.E.A. officer always needed to look their best, even if they were going to spend a good part of the day in a sewer. Thankfully, the station she was meeting the brothers at would be supplying the three with proper outer clothing for the trek. But this....Whatever it was....She really was not in the mood for it. She was not even sure what she could do? Was this something Swift and his new friends were messing around with? Were they playing O&O? There were no rule-books or dice about. Maybe it was what some referred to as ‘live action role playing’. This was something her sweet little Swift would do.
 
Now the old stallion was running amuck. Hopefully the old manor had adequate insurance. If the creaky pony were to trip or break his hip, it would be total lawsuit city here. “Ninja’ed?” She was very sure that was not a proper word. “I don’t believe they were trying to kill you. Unless you are deathly allergic to feathers.” If so, he probably would not be able to stay in the same room as their griffon friend, Zelda. The fuzzy girl was a bit of a hugger. “Watch out for...”
 
This was already the second time the mare had yelped out the word “Yeee!” today. This sound she made was uttered as the unicorn’s telekinesis dragged her to 'safety'. She was adorned in the finest of griffon steel, which would be good enough, but her fine suit of armor was also heavily enchanted. She could stand tall against war-hammers, dragonfire, powerful magics, so she knew it could do well against comp pillows. And now there were feathers all over the place. The strange fellow with the even stranger name had sliced one of the pillows in half.  “Oh dear.”

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As hip as it was bringing back grown ponies in pajamas, it was a bit inconceivable that such a group would time their arrival in a coordinating fashion to match Fire's attempt to trespass against a great adversary. It was bad timing that reflected an even worse possibility had these nin-pony been in kahoots with the hedge mage. Her confusion was warranted. After all in what state of sanity would one allow themselves to be cornered into believing such unrealistic representations of an aforementioned group? Ninjas weren't just some cosplay group that defeated aliens who attempted to conquer Equus in the flashiest way possible. It seemed like a bad plot from a Neighponese tokusatsu in all fairness.

 

Xiêyè's opponent was without challenge for the excellent swordplay he displayed. The ninjas was hardly a challenge. Nothing like the details of old legends spoke of. These beings were masters of disguise and ingenious tacticians. By the very way they tossed about the beings facing them were no true ninja. What was most curious was it's defeat though! When Xiêyè slew his opponent by breaking it's seal, or would erupt into the very splitters that had originally made up the totems Squall was so proud of prior to their animation. Strange. Was the wood still animated even after it was turned into splinters? That was the ultimate mystery!

 

Two were down and out, leaving only three, thanks to Squall's swift, inelegant attempt to guard the mare from sudden defeat by pillow. At least he had a portion of his dignity to remain! But a portion. With the three remain and Fire's temper growing short with foolishness, it seemed, the old stallion frowned, his back to them. He had pushed to stand, the raccoon scurrying back onto his head, tugging his ear and pointing behind them. The dark, armor griffon got quite a sound to escape the mare, which made the old pony laugh, except a yelp would escape him soon after as the pink nin-pony git his back end with a pillow, feathers erupting everywhere! He was scared stiff that he almost lost his transformation. Well he lost some of it as, for a moment his brows became rather busy grey and a majestic wizard beard appeared. They quickly vanished as the old wizardcorn whipped around, only to be pelt in the chin by the ninja that had pounced Squall and Fire.

 

He was losing control of his own game! Dizzy eyes and a crumpled heap of parts on the ground the disguised draconequus wasn't keen on losing. The ninja shadows hihoofed and dashed off when Xiêyè entered the room. It was but a moment later the former two stumbled back in, being pushed out by the ninja Fire's shadow created. Squall and Strifecord's shadow dropped to their knees, Squall's colored ninja using a pair of hyoshigi to increase the dramatization of her entry. Strifecord's pink nin-pony shadow stood on the other side of the entrance with a basket of cherry blossoms in its forelimbs, tossing out the petals. Fire's shadow held two pillows bound end to end by their own  pillow cases creating a deadly pair of pillowchucks. It was obvious it was Fire's as it was her favorite color. Their weakness was also now known by Xiêyè and the raccoon. A simple match against the remaining three.

 

Strifecord looked to a script he had in hoof, a pair of bifocals on the old pony's muzzle. "This is becoming an overly complicated drama. It says here the ninja is challenging the Pegasus for not honoring the pact." He passes Squall the script, completely out of the blue. 

 

Speaking of color, these three where what who remained. While it was a challenge of the century, the odd old pony only seemed to grow odder and odder. As he sat on his haunches his forelimbs tucked against his chest in a very unpony fashion. He almost seemed to sit up like a griffon or… another creature. His grin had a snaggled tooth and his eyes a most wizened gaze. That short, scruffy mane looked a certain brand of style yet behind all of that -- this pony was just hard to notice. And that was all part of the magical illusion. 

 

The ninja formed from Fire's shadow shared her stature and elegant style, but the goofy pillowchucks certainly shattered the serious illusion of a grand warrior. The visits today very odd and, above all, entertaining! But as all things such a break from the mundane would soon end. Asking as the little ponies had fun, right?

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Swift Squall really didn't need this. He hadn't slept at all during last 52 hours and the effects started getting to him. Being hit by surprisingly hard pillows certainly wasn't doing any favors either, when it came to pulling his thoughts together.

"Urghhh....ugghhhhh..." Squall rolled over, mumbling 'intelligently'.. This certainly wasn't his day.

"At this point...the only mismatch of colors I want to see, is one of those ordered pizzas." noblepony said, using zweihoofer from earlier as a linchpin to pull himself up.

 

"Alright. No." Swift drawled upon seeing more 'ninjas' entering the room. As if on command, large cabinet flew through the room, hurled by unicorn's magic. The poor hyoshigi  wielding shadow was flattened against the wall by weaponized piece of furniture - for him, the show was already over.

"And stay down..." noblepony growled, turning around to face other ninjas.

 

It was Stife, increasingly odd behavior that finally allowed the unicorn to take a hint. That, along a few hits to the head. Probably.

"Wha...?" Squall expressed confusion at spontaneous item creation, as well as 'script' the 'detective' has offered him. The writing was made from comprehensible words, but it was overall complete gibberish. For a moment noblepony even had a feeling that some words were switching places when he wasn't focusing on them. And the name....Strife. Very clever.

 

"Who....what are you?" Squallcoast asked demandingly, with massive blade raising to the air next to him.

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Ho-Boy. Fire Walker did not need this. Not right now. Not right ever.
 
She wanted to spend some quality time with her very special stallion. Time that involves smooching. Time that involved him giving her a good ol massage. Her muscles ached after all the crawling about she had been involved in. And those two brothers! Gah! They didn’t know when to shut up! Always yammering about their adventures! If she mentioned something she faced in the past, they always had to one-up her! And she was a big fan of stories! She grew up listening to her father’s friends. Colonel Critchlow and Neptune Rex always had a story or two to tell. But now she was an adult and the best stories were told at the pub with friends and a pitcher of Köstliche Pferd. Those Germanes knew their beer!
 
But here she was, in what she had been sure was her Swift Squall’s stately manor, but instead it was a nuthouse! So much crazy chaos! And what was going on with the older pony? She had been curious about the fella. As a pony who was trained against the dark arts, she knew he was powerful. Old unicorns usually were. And there was something about this guy. Had she seen him before? Those crimson eyes....the grey coat. Almost reminded her of old General Pummel, but he was a Pegasus, just like her! And there was also that mane...And his snaggletooth. It was less pronounced. She could see him flying over her. The clouds turning pink and the chocolate milk. So much chocolate rain! But it had gone bad and was now all over her body. Getting into her armor. She could hear the next of kin to chaos as he cackled away. Next of kin? He was chaos..He was...
 
"Discord."
 
She was very annoyed with the devious draconequus, but she was not stupid. She knew how powerful he was and dared not to annoy him. Even if he was considered 'reformed', he was still very dangerous. "So.", she sighed, "When did you start making house-calls?"
 
 
 
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Well, it seemed there was but two of those ridiculous things left standing, since Swift had crushed one right after he had re-entered the room. He had no idea how these things had come to life, and he honestly didn’t care at this point. The longma knew how to deal with them. 

 

“Seals. Aim there.” He said simply, glaring a bit at the two ‘ninjas’. He was not in the mood after his long day traveling, he simply wanted rest. “Discord?” He asked, repeating the name Fire provided as he raised an eyebrow and looked over at her. The name didn’t really ring any bells, he wasn’t sure what she was talking about. 

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Oh the disguised spirit was beside himself with laughter. Well, not actually beside himself. That was one of the rangers! His hoof had slung over the mokujin’s shoulder, the pink nin-pony tuning to face his shadowmaker. It slowly held up a hoof in greeting as the grey unicorn blinked and looked to his creation. He thrust his left forehoof in a straight kick, aiming for the weak spot in the center of his chest. A plume of smoke surrounded the nin-pony, turning him back to the part of the totem he was was part of. The others defeated had also returned to this state after the puff of white smoke cleared from them.

 

The unicorn grinned, his snaggletooth showing off. His ear twitched before swiveling it in Squall’s direction. “I am but a humble traveler.” He assured, turning his skull to fully face the purveyor of the weird and unique, laughing at the air of madness that was wholly tamed by compare to the days of olde.

 

He turned his head to the ever impatient Fire Walker. He was quite surprised her temper had  remained in check as long as it did. Neighbors did always seem to strain the host when they overstayed their welcome. Discord always the exception to a rule. It seemed Fire Walker had just about enough of this particular neighbor. Hoof knit sweaters and horseshoes aside she nary seemed willing to have somepony nosing about that ruined her alone time! Xiêyè seemed to know not who the legendary beast was and that only made his coming out all the more dramatic.

 

The unicorn out his hoof to his chest, sitting up on his haunches. He floated off the ground as the Raccoon took over the hyoshigi and clapped the wooden sticks together as smoke surrounded the unicorn, wrapping him in a pink smog that started to take the shape of a fearsome Long. By the descriptions of ancient tales the long bodied serpent gods with curled horns seemed to be what the pink plume formed. But as the raccoon clapped the hyoshigi faster and faster the shadow nin-ponies dropped to their knees in a panic, the remaining two bowing at the formation of this auspicious being! The raccoon blinked and swung its arms out, the hyoshigi sticks hitting the center seals of the two remaining nin-pony and turning them back to the totem pieces.

.

As the cloud dissipated Discord began to take his full form. Mismatched parts and an outfit as absurd as he! Polka dots pajamas with a hole in the bottom for his tail and Angel Bunny slippers on his hind hooves. “Oh, you know they say the best way to get to know some pony is to sleep over!” He leaned back in the air and waved his paw at the perceptive mare. “Besides I couldn't resist visiting Squall! He always has such interesting toys to play with.” as he said this all the pieces of the totem would stack themselves back before the group, as if to illustrate his point.

 

He looked over to Xiêyè and bowed. “Discord, god of chaos and disharmony. Also known as your local hero and busybody.” He added.

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By all mean what in Tartarus....?

 

"What." Squall said flatly after Fire reveled that their guest was as far removed from being 'a humble traveler' as it could get.

"WHAT?" he repeated when Discord took his true form. This wasn't Ponyville, wasn't it? Besides some nutjobs in the sewers Fillydelphia was as normal and serene of a place as it could be. So in Celestia Solar Flank, why was he here?!

 

"Probably to rearrange this 'normal and serene' a little." A snarky response came from a corner in his mind.

"...And walking nightmare of orthodontists everywhere." Squall added in a deadpan voice, right after Discords introduction. "Are we supposed to go 'Ohh' and 'Ahh' at your presence Discord? I am sorry but  despite what that book published by Miss Sparkle and friends says..." he paused "...I am not exactly thrilled by you being here, 'O God of Chaos'. Especially after your cross-country tournée you did with that centaur, me not being present in county back then notwithstanding." Swift said, going extra mile for his words to sting.

"Not only that, you used my goodwill to get inside and sow chaos, hiding who you really are, all for your own amusement. Not exactly a way to mend bad first impressions...." noblepony added, clearly barely holding his temper in check. "I should show you the door, right now!" swordpony raised his voice for a moment.

 

Swift took a long deep breath. And another. And again. Good.

"But it doesn't change that I welcomed you in. And Squallcoast never backtracks on his or her hospitality. Very well then. You can 'rest' within the walls of my manor. But after a sunrise next day, I want you out!" he growled, wrapping himself more tightly in his bathrobe, and storming off to the kitchen. He really needed some coffee right now....

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Xiêyè did not know who Discord was? Maybe Equestria news only stayed in the kingdom? The officer could not help but grin when Discord apparently gave himself an upgrade. God of chaos? That sounded rather scary. Almost like the 'great old ones' mentioned in her brother Moon Walker's creepy old books. Just seeing one of these creatures would drive any civilized pony mad. And one of the 'old ones' did remind her of Discord, but they threw an octopus in that mix as well. Maybe the writers simply knew about Discord and did their own variation of him. Would he be able to sue these writers?
 
He mentioned a 'sleepover' again? What was with that? Fire Walker took a moment to ponder this. She awoke not that long ago and she had a job. But did she do the job? She had memories of working underground with the brothers. But was that job tonight? Small memories started to form. Darkness. Spells. The hedge mage tried to control her mind, but the brothers were fast and countered his spell. But something happened to her memories of the mission. The enemy spell-caster was defeated, but the officer needed help back to the barracks. They had to check her out to make sure she did not end up with anything nasty after hanging around a nasty sewer for an a few hours. There was always typhoid, paratyphoid, bacillary dysentery, gastroenteritis, and cholera to be found there. And sweet Ilinalta made sure she did not suffer any magical side effects from the hedge mage. Her Swiss-cheesed brains were slowly returning memories. She had memories of being brought to the manor by Ilinalta and a few others. They met with Swift's butler, Oak Branch, who helped her to bed.
 
Backing up to just a few moments ago, she recalled Discord using the word 'Sleepover'. Did he believe that was what she was doing with Swift? For such an old and powerful creature, he was rather innocent. Were there any female draconequus? As she pondered this bit of insanity, her dear Swift had a few words with his 'guest'. And while she approved of his bravery, there were some things you should never do. You would never tug on Princess Celestia's tail. It would be for the best that you would never spit in the wind. You would never, pull the hat off of Daring Do, and you should never insult a creature as powerful as Discord.
 
"Don't mind him.", she smiled at the kooky king of chaos, "He's just that way before his morning coffee. Oooh.", an idea popped up, "Dear Swift.", she cooed, "Once you're done with your brew, could you please make me a pot of my ''Dreaded Motaba Blend'?", she had fully put on her 'friendly host' face as she addressed the pair. "You two could have a cup just as long as you don't have any heart issues. Or ulcers...Or weak kidneys.  Stuff is strong. Soo.." she turned her full attention back to Discord, "What brings you to Stately Squallcoast  Manor?"
 
Spoiler


OOC: Ugh. Looking at old posts, I had just realized that Fire Walker was getting ready for the underground 'mission' at the start of this RP. And then newer posts suggested she already did the mission! Ack! Had to make up some nonsense to fix this,.

 

 

 
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