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Order in the Court! (Open: Read Rules)


SteelEagle

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Twilight looked down excitedly at the setup. A gavel. Papers. She had thought about a wig but had decided that was a little much. She probably could have done this in her throne room but that was decidedly more dull than what she was doing now, at least to a mare with a noted passion for procedures. For this she needed a proper courtroom with all the furnishings. Rows for people to sit and watch. The defense and prosecution had different tables. The judge, witness stands, and court reporters seats were in the appropriate positions of authority. It was a very exciting time to be Twilight, assuming one longed to leave the comforts of a beautiful castle, go halfway across town, and hitch oneself to the older and rustic trappings of a frontier town's hall of justice. Which Twilight did. It was accurate enough and delightful. She was almost happy that this was an emergency decision.

 

The Honorable Judge Keen Word of Ponyville's Small Disputes and Claims Court had returned suddenly and rather unexpectedly. Most were alarmed by this and confused as to the circumstances, though Twilight believed she had a good ideas as to why. He was a arachnophobe of the highest order. One of his last disputes involved a spider farm. They had brought hundreds of 'samples' that had ended up all over the court room. He hadn't even rendered a verdict from the bench, he sent a notarized letter. Either way, his sudden bench-leaving was not what Ponyville wanted. He watched over the small cases that were very common in towns such as this. Without him, higher courts would have to deal with relatively petty cases, which would distract from their vitally important mission of keeping Equestria safe from the criminal element.

So she decided to lend a hoof. A part of her had wanted to go ahead and move into the big srious cases that dominated the mind of the legally inclined, but she didn't want to step on the forelocks of the trained and experienced judges who were still hard at work. So she instead took over, for a few days, the Small Disputes and Claims Court. The cases here weren't of a truly criminal, felonious nature. Some misdemeanors but mostly small disputes. Who owned a cow. Shipping and handling problems. A candy bar was stolen. Lots of small things, but it was the small things that made this town great and it was the small things she would assure were given attention.

She sat down in her comfortable seat, her black robe swishing around her. She put glasses on- the look had to be complete- and cleared her throat. The doors were opened and ponies started to take their seats. After a few seconds she smiled wide and beckoned the coming of JUSTICE. “Please be seated. And with that, I am ready to hear my first case!"

OOC Rules-
1- You may have a case between your own characters or even an NPC.
2- Prefer that you work with someone else and have a case between two characters.
3- Cases should remain somewhat low key- a lost shipment of apples, poor contracting work, money owed between friends, drunk in public, etc. the sort of thing you might see ten thousand of a day in a lower court.
4- Twilight's word is final.

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  • 2 weeks later...

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Justice huh? He has run courts in the past, sometimes to condemn entire species for the crimes of a few and thus far they've all been simulated circuses without the elephants. A peanut gallery that would hoot and holler as their fellows would fail to defend their critically undisciplined nature and unsophisticated, barbarous traditions. While the power trip was fantastic he had to agree that these show debates were delightful, especially when they got to the punishment. His own punishment seemed highly unfair given Celestia and Luna were the Judge, Jury, and Executioner He preferred using a gallery of peers to condemn an individual, but apparently that was not how Equestria ran it's courts anymore! How he missed the days of yore where offenders were paraded around in public and rotten tomatoes were hurled about to humiliate them.

 

But today Discord was in need of Twilight's diplomatic expertise. Not as the god of chaos, but instead a local repair pony by the name of Detached Cable, otherwise simply known as Cabby. There seems a situation arose when a costumer was unsatisfied with the repairs. While the object in question was working the pegasus did not quite put it back together the way it had been. He was suppose to replace a pipe in a sink as it has rusted to disuse. He replaced the pipe, but now the entire sink was a hot pink and made hot cocoa with a dial. And that was just one of the improvements. To say the least the sink now worked with a few additional adjustments to create an effective device, if not a bit chaotic.

 

The one opposing the change: Distant Lightning. He was a new resident from Saddle Arabia and disliked the changes done to his kitchen sink. Lightning would take his place in his usual tabard and fauxhawk slicked mane. The fire maned pegasus was prepared to argue the work and wanted his money back. Discord, currently discussed as a small, grey pegasus with no mane would be in a suit with large, magnifying glass on his muzzle and his briefcase.

 

“Madam,” Light began. “My sink is no longer a sink but a garbage disposer, a cocoa maker and makes waffles.” That seemed the opposite of a problem…

 

Disco-- Cabby cleared his throat and nodded. “I did the repairs asked of me and fairly paid. The additions were gifts for a loyal costumer.” The buck-toothed pegasus assured.

 

“Loyal?! I met you yesterday for the first time!” Lightning complained.

 

Cabby pouted and pulled the photos out he had of the sink in question. “Princess, exhibit one.” He would trotted to her table and place the images.


Originally it had been an ordinary, stone sink than the change it was hot pink with several buttons and doodads hanging out, seemingly, to operate it. It didn't look easy but he had been hired to make the water run again. And it does! The grey pegasus moved to sit back down. Lightning fumed. He wanted a full refund!

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The basis of this case seemed simple enough, which was well enough for the first trial of the day. The defendant, a contractor, had agreed to a simple repair job. The plaintiff, the customer, found that while the repair had indeed been completed, the defendant had done additional work that made normal operation of the sink more of a hassle than he wanted. He wanted to be compensated for this, while the defendant claimed that the repair work was done and the additions were for a loyal customer. And on the face of it all, that was all that had happened. It was a very easy case if you knew the law in any way, and as such, it required little work on her part.

 

The contract asked only for repair work. Any additional work was a breach of contract, regardless of whether it was additional, free work. Indeed, it was also illegal to do such work for free if you were a contracted professional in the middle a job. That was to protect both parties. At the same time, the plaintiff was not entitled to a refund because the base repair job that he contracted for was completed, and normal operation was indeed possible. What he was entitled to was a free disassembly of the new parts and a working sink, as requested. If the defendant failed this, then he would have to pay out of pocket for another licensed professional to take care of it.

 

It was so simple, it was somewhat of a shame that Discord chose this as his appearance of the day. His aetheric signature was so strange and strong that it was very hard for him to not be noticed by Twilight, who had, per usual security protocol, enhanced the aetheric channeling of the courtroom to tip her off to any possible magic attack. In this case, she knew who it was, and was a little vexed that Discord couldn't help but 'improve' the lot of others. Still, she would be gentle. "Hmmm. Well, I see that the contract called only for a repair," she said, reading her own copy of the contract. "By law, that WAS completed, was it not Mr. Lightning?" She said, giving him time to respond before turning to 'Cabby'.

 

"Of course, that is all the contract called for. Additional, unpaid for work during the completion of a contract that does not contribute to the completion of the contract is illegal, as is modifying the workings of somepony's property without consent. Not only that, but if you made normal operation inconvenient or otherwise difficult due to your work, you could be held in breach of contract if the paying party is unsatisfied and can prove it is difficult, inconvenient, or not as intended. Mr. Cable, Mr. Lightning, your replies?"

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If he needed to, Discord could easily seal away his energy to blend in with the ponies, but some days it simply was an effort that was unnecessary. Average ponies couldn't touch the aether with their senses so easily, thus his would thread between the coils so erratically that picking out his from the whole tapestry was nigh impossible. He came off as strange or peculiar to most due to the wayward twists in his energy. Sadly Twilight was far from ordinary, but it was what made this game all the more fun. It was the duty of a judge to play a role and if she broke it to reprimand him when he was clearly doing his job… well it didn't seem very sporting of her! He did his best to help, but he was still a chaotic being and his sense of aesthetics was, measurably, off.

 

Cabby licked his bucked tooth as he pulled a cup of tea from his briefcase to take a sip. Cables of all sorts hung from the case and piping was sticking out.  It seemed he carried his work with him wherever he went! Lightning had to do a double take as, when he glanced over at the overly artistic repair pony, he could have sworn he saw a cup of tea but, instead, it was a screwdriver.

 

An ordinary screwdriver.

 

The two would listen as the princess spoke. Lightning stood with a proud stance. You could take the noble out of the capital, but you couldn't take the smig out the pegasus. He knew his rights and he certainly did not agree to any additional work! Some ponies should know their limits! Lightning did, and he wouldn't cross a line by doing something foolish as ...

 

“Napkin.” Cabby would correct.

 

Lightning became still, his hooves digging against the ground as his nerves began to rattle. The monocle held in the pegasus noble's right eye began to slip as the sweat began to trickle from his brow to his muzzle. Cabby had a calm expression as he looked down to his magnifying glass and cleaned the surface with a kerchief. He pulled a napkin from his briefcase and, with magnifying glass bouncing on his muzzle he trotted to Twilight and set the evidence down.

 

“Exhibit B.” He declared. “An agreement written on coffee on a napkin, signed by the gaudy bird.”

 

“Gaudy?!” Lighting chirped, clearly not hearing the bird comment, or far too used to it. “Good sir, do you slander me?”

 

Cabby put a grin on his face, those bucked, front teeth pressing against his lower lips. “An unofficial agreement.” The words dramatically rang out in the makeshift courtroom, carried by an echo Disc--abby likely threw.

 

The napkin read as followed:

 

I'll fix up yer sink and some extra for twenty bits

 

Overpricing aside… It wasn't even an official contract yet Disco--Cabby and Lightning had signed the agreement. The document was riddled with enough loopholes that the spirit was given free rein and, had Lightning known he was opening Pandora's box with their coffeehuas conversation he would have, perhaps, made a proper contract. By the smear of cheesecake on the napkin this was the special to the cafe yesterday! It didn't seem it was a piece of agreement that could go through the right channels. Cabby smiled knowingly at Twilight. He cocked his head and folded his ears back against his skull.

 

“As you can see..” he began in, not his usual voice, but one more befitting the little, grey pegasus. A list became clear over the larger teeth. “There is nothing specifying I wasn't going to make additions. In fact if states the possibility of additional work.” He glanced back to Light. “I rest. Cause my hooves are killing me. You picked a really out of the way place.” He complained before returning to his seat.

 

At this point all the color drained from Light who know that had been foolish… But he had no choice. Ah! Ah! That is right. He had no choice. He was coerced! Light would speak up while he had the chance. He stumbled a bit at first, his Saddle Arabian accent culling his Equestrian speech for a moment.

 

“It was an agreement made under duress!” He assured, fumbling his monocle. “You see I was in deep distress. My special somepony is with foal and is close to expecting so my duty to my household is to ensure all is prepared for the arrival whole she is unable to tend to chores! When the pipe became the source of my sink's troubles I had no sense, and few bits, to turn a clear head to the situation.” He jumped at the chance for a free repair.

 

Cabby snorted. As if bits and sense we're even useful! “Your judgeness. Exhibit C.” The disguised pegasus hopped over to Twilight once more and set a warm waffle, atop a plate, in front of her. “Waffles. He can make waffles now.” Who could deny waffles?!


It seemed Lightning was defeated! He was agape, aghast… he had never seen such absurdly backwards, yet correct logic.

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Twilight couldn't help but smile, though she hid it expertly behind a discerning hoof to her chin while she eyed the napkin closely. Not that it mattered. As intriguing a turn of events this was due to the reaction of Lightning, it actually didn't change the legal matter any. She wished Discord would simply acquiesce to good form and conduct in his dealings with others who weren't used to his...unusual ways, but she figured that it couldn't be helped or hindered any. He was who he was and he was going to do what he did. She could only be pleased that he kept his unusual ways to good works for others, even if they didn't want it, need it, or ask for it in any way. Of course that didn't make her cause any easier. She didn't want to make him too unhappy, but she had to follow the law...and it still wasn't on his side, for one very simple reason.

 

"This would be a legal contract, were it written on a legal form of paper. Legal documents cannot be issued on napkins unless there is considerable duress involved which, in a civil case such as this, cannot be the case," she said with a sigh, looking at 'Cabby'. What she wanted to tell him was to lay off the crudgy old sap; while his intentions were indeed very kind, he needed to know when and where to do such things and for whom. Speaking of nice things, the waffles were very good. "No matter what though, these are some awfully tasty waffles. Good work for smomepony just fixing a sink!" she gulped with exaggerated sound, determined to make it sound like a wonderful deal. "So, Lightning. Are you realy sure you wish to pursue compensation or repair for this gentlepony's work?"
 

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  • 3 weeks later...

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Oh Dis-- Cabby was quite pleased with himself. Not only did he follow the rules,  but he made fantastic pancakes even princesses enjoyed! This wasn't the first time the repairpony made an odd addition to a sink, or a ceiling fan. Oft times his remodeling went well with the pony in question. SOme would simply laugh it off and praise his sense of creativity. Honestly he had to agree with Big Mac in that this town got weirder every day and it wasn’t even his fault! There was just something about this place that attracted chaos. He was here after all, wasn't he? This was where he made his residence and it was the place least ill-effected by his general tomfoolery. Honestly Ponyville was the first and only place to ever bounce back so quickly after one of his spells. It was as if it were just another day in the neighborhood, a beautiful day. From his bag Cabby pulled out a yellow sweater, hoof knit by a dear friend of his. Twas chilly in the courtroom! Pffft. Courtroom.

 

Lightning was not pleased seeing that napkin brought out and toted about as evidence. He had not, at first, taken the offer from the repairpony with such seriousness seeing as the process at which he claimed to produce such exceptional work at such a low price was merely arrogance, ego. He never would have expected that hours later in the day the spirited pony would find his abode! Not that it was difficult mind your. The Saddle Arabian had some rather obvious tendencies when it came to decorating. In particular his tribe's flag hanging above the outer door. One could call it a hunch, but knowing Discord…

 

The phoenix maned pegasus folded his ears back. The gold, beaded chain, which hung from his monocle held it anchored to his ear via a piercing: made a gentle chime as the paper this folds of flesh wriggled with distress. If he did not stand his ground he may seem a fool now!  He had his proud as a homeowner! It was his first place away from his family's estate too! But the waffles were good when he had them. That he could not protest. The manner in which they struck the deal was shady, at best. Were the foreign pegasus honest with himself he didn't wish to put this on parade. This was not his home, at least he has not yet fully integrated into the odd place that was Ponyville. Its culture was far beyond anything he could comprehend. While there were never cultures that were exactly alike they still shared some sense of origin, a sense that they were all of the same world.

 

Ponyville bordered on utopian.

 

It was a bit terrifying. Saddle Arabia was outstanding in its culture. It had knowledge, camaraderie, and a growth that spanned countless generations. And yet here stood Ponyville. In but three generations it has become the backbone of Equestria, the seat of the Capital. While Canterlot was a ways away: many depended on the goods and commerce that came from here. And here he was complaining about free waffles. This place was just bizarre. In Saddle Arabia he wouldn't even have this issue to begin with. But it wasn't Saddle Arabia. In Ponyville waffles were far from a problem. He had to accept that.

 

Accept defeat.

 

Lightning sighed and slid his red hooves from the table’s surface and onto the ground. “I… No ma’am. I suppose it really isn't that big of a deal.” He would sigh before pulling himself together and letting his pride return. “I am not a native to Ponyville.” He strong stated, as if it were some sort of immunization he lacked. “I suppose it was surprising to have my sink repaired and for it to be able to slice, dice and…” what was the other thing he said it could do besides the waffles and smoothies?

 

“Fries.” Cabby stated, holding up a hot basket of potato fries. “It juliennes fries.” He set the evidence down for Twilight.

 

Though the evidence was starting to look like bribes. Can't smiled and wiggled those good ears. “So whaddya say Princess? Is then problem solved? We're all friends, right?” He lisped behind those bucked teeth.

Light turned his face away and waved his hoof, utterly embarrassed at this point. All this over some waffles. He could now understand the troubles judges faced on a regular basis. Never again would he call courtrooms circuses. After taking the role of the clown this day, he has had his fill. Lightning accepted that it was more trouble than it was worth. Problems in Ponyville we're not solved like other places. And that was what made it interesting.

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Twilight had to admit that she was more than a little shocked at the reactions from both parties to what she said. She hadn't really expected much else from Discord. She didn't really think he understood where he was right now, let alone what was being said. This wasn't because he was stupid- far from it, he had an ancient and powerful intellect. Rather, he seemed to only vaguely understand the mores and manners of Equestrian culture and law. It all seemed more like abstract concepts and ideas than actual, definitive sets of consequences and barriers. So when she shot down his only piece of evidence, his happy go lucky, carefree look wasn't that shocking all things told. He operated differently from others in the end.

But Lightning was shocking. He acted as if the defeat of the defense's only piece of evidence to support it was a defeat for him, the plaintiff. She wracked her brain trying to remember a similar reaction from any other court case she could imagine, from the courts of Manehattan and Canterlot to Manephis, Barn, Kastrot, Amani, and Kyoma. All of them had their own strange quirks and elements that could radically change how one looked at law and order. None of them she could remember had this sort of reaction where the plaintiff looked defeated when the defendant suffered an evidentiary blow. She had a hard time wrapping her brain around it, and she looked at them both blankly as Lightning prepared to speak, her mouth working working on the waffles as she waited.

He decided not to press any further. That was more than acceptable. “Friendship? That is up to you. But Lightning has said he wishes to not pursue this any further so...” she gulped down, raised her gavel with magic, and spoke. “Then I declare this case dismissed,” she said and then slammed the gavel down. She finished the food in her mouth. “As a normal citizen and not a judge since the case is now closed, I must say I was a little shocked there. You could have gotten everything fixed and even refunded, Lightning, had you simply said you wanted to when I asked. Cabby had nothing- the napkin meant nothing,” she shrugged, “I'm sure you have your reasons. Thank both of you for making this a quick case. Please depart so the next case may be heard,” she said with a smile.

When Lightning had left but before Cabby did, Twilight's horn lit up and she poked in the mane. “I need to speak with you,” she said sternly. When Discord was close, she leaned in, “I have a spare sink in the kitchen. Could you do the same? Those waffles were amazing. And for future reference, please only do what ponies are asking you to do- it is dangerous from a friend-making perspective to not listen, even if you think you're doing them a favor. Understand?”

OOC- One more post from Discord. Then the next case may begin!

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It was too late.

 

It was too late for Lightning to truly realize that he could fix things. Whole a smart and clever sort law was not a predicament he was able to handle, understand. His mind was, more often than not, used to untangle the mysteries of histories. Not law. So when she had said the format in which the contract was signed was indeed, invalid, he had not though it put him in the clear. And the smaller fellow was so, unnervingly, confident. The doubt of continuing to bicker over such a discordant topic pushed to be a waste of energy. It was not until the gavel was struck, stinging his gentle ears, and the mistress judge’s words sang out. He could have proceeded. Alas…

 

Lightning sighed. “An opportunity missed. I hadn't regard for the words you spoke, believing I had come out of line. Pursing this would have turned me fortuitous you say? But under what cost I wonder? I have absolutely no understanding of these kinds of proceedings. Up until a month prior I have been cared for by my family, doing naught but my studies, lectures and thesis. My skills and knowledge are saturated into one task, adventure having led me to Ponyville in a short half-year. It is all quite difficult to understand coming from being sheltered,you to prancing about the wilderness and, at final last to a place as such.” He would, humbly, admit despite seeming to have a personality of a snobby noble unwilling to lose. It was all quite new to him. “I do apologize l.” He granted. “But in a sense I am glad I did not have the sense to proceed. “Would it do to fight over waffles?” They were nice, he supposed. At least it was something his special somepony would enjoy.

 

The nobly garbed pony would bow his head and turn to exit. New to Ponyville and to the world beyond his studies Light had a lot to learn. Things just did not happen his way and as his parents dictated. It was a weird wide world full of waffles. Lightning departed, but not without a lesson learned. This left Cabby with the mare as he packed up his stuff. He seemed his usual smug self, having had won. And fairly mind you: even if under the pretense of victory assured by a less-than-knowledgeable bookpony. He was just glad Lightning’s expertise was observing ponies eating breakfast and not law. As he was about to leave Twilight stopped him. The clever repairpony pouted.

 

The goofy pegasus came to a halt and turned his head to face the mare. He sucked his bucked tooth and grinned. “They are pretty tasty aren’t they?” Who didn’t want a waffle making mechanism in their sink? A quick splorft of batter and they were ready in seconds!  His long, floppy ear perked up at her cunning behavior. “You know I am really going to have to start putting aether blockers on my spells if you’re going to be such a clever mare.” he sighed, ears folding back. “Oh, alright. Spoilsport. It was only a little joke. Nopony was hurt. Besides consider it a gift to the new Ponyville resident. I’ll just use some of your fancy paper for writing contracts in the future!” Wouldn’t want to get in trouble. Though he could get her in trouble!

 

He was only tasing right?

 

“Ta, ta darling~ I am helping Rarity put in a new shelf~!” He chortled and pranced out. Such a silly fellow. Even his court cases were a bit nonsensical. Out the Spi-- pegasus went!

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The stallion made his exit, hopefully ruminating on whether or not he had adequately listened to what Twilight had been saying. She was going to bank on a failure to communicate being the foundation of his poor experience today since he had been one-hundred percent in the legal right in this case. A silly case to bring to court? Perhaps, though it was always a rough shock to have something you wanted done superseded or done only in addition to a bunch of things that you didn't ask for and weren't in the ordered side of things. Hopefully he would learn to accept his now unusual kitchen makeup with great aplumb. Likely not though, He didn't seem the type.

Discord wasn't the type to really take the proper lesson from this either, but she knew he would at least try, and that was all she could really ask of him. His intentions were good, even if they were still tainted by his chaotic nature. But Chaos wasn't always a bad thing, and he was rarely in it for anything less than a good time. Twilight doubted he would ever fully get it, but she also knew that the great tragedy and meaning behind him was that it didn't stop him from trying, or from ponies trying to understand him. And maybe in the end that was victory enough in the reckoning of things and she should be pleased to have that much happening. She smiled. “Well, say hi to Rarity for me. I'm sure you'll do a great job,” she said, emphasizing the word job so he would hopefully understand the implication.

She didn't think he would, but she would be more than happy to be prove wrong. She shifted some papers around and coughed. When she was ready, she motioned to a guard. “Tell the next case I am ready to hear them,” she said, waiting for the doors to open and the next pair or more to make their way in. What an exciting and wonderful day!

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