31 replies to this topic

[Kimono]

Phil the Time Wizard, on 23 July 2012 - 10:01 AM, said:

Well, looking at the character, you say she likes quiet environments, so we probably want to stay away from the really big cities like Manehattan and Stalliongrad, and I really don't think she seems like the type who would live anywhere out west near Appleloosa. You probably do want more of an ordinary small town feel with the character. I'd personally suggest Solstice Heights (perhaps near the Whitetail Woods if you still want her around a forest) or maybe in Fillydelphia, but it's up to you to decide. If no other place does it for you and you really want her to live in Ponyville, that might also be okay. We encourage players to live elsewhere since there are already so many ponies there, but we don't flat out not allow it. I don't think that alone would keep your application from passing.

Okay, Anything else?

[Phil the Time Wizard]

Kimono, on 23 July 2012 - 12:37 PM, said:

Okay, Anything else?

Well, it could just generally use a little more detail. You don't have to tell us everything, but the application is suppose to give us a good idea who the character is, and right now this one is a little slight. Why does Kimono dislike younger ponies (you still didn't do anything to give a sense of how old she might be)?  Also, and I'm surprised I didn't think to say this earlier, a cutie mark is supposed to have at least some bearing on a pony's special talent. If her cutie mark is related to making lanterns, why did she decide to become a doctor rather than some kind of lantern maker? I know you say she had to take care of her injured mother when it all happened, but the part that was important enough to become her cutie mark was the lanterns she made? There just seems to be a little disconnect there.

Also, you didn't fully delete the line about Everfree Forest. You left a little of the name in toward the end of the app.

[Kimono]

Phil the Time Wizard, on 23 July 2012 - 10:56 PM, said:

Well, it could just generally use a little more detail. You don't have to tell us everything, but the application is suppose to give us a good idea who the character is, and right now this one is a little slight. Why does Kimono dislike younger ponies (you still didn't do anything to give a sense of how old she might be)?  Also, and I'm surprised I didn't think to say this earlier, a cutie mark is supposed to have at least some bearing on a pony's special talent. If her cutie mark is related to making lanterns, why did she decide to become a doctor rather than some kind of lantern maker? I know you say she had to take care of her injured mother when it all happened, but the part that was important enough to become her cutie mark was the lanterns she made? There just seems to be a little disconnect there.

Also, you didn't fully delete the line about Everfree Forest. You left a little of the name in toward the end of the app.

Hmmm okay. I think I'll change it to Lantern Maker. I also changed a few things. What would you suggest from here?

[Phil the Time Wizard]

You're very close. The last thing in the app that seems to stand out to me is the line that says that she likes to destroy things. By nature, ponies tend to be fairly peaceful and non-destructive. That's not to say your character can't be an exception; for a character like her who is perhaps more quiet and nurturing, it could actually prove to be a quite interesting personality quirk to indulge in occasional destruction so long as it doesn't end up hurting anypony--I'm just left wondering why she enjoys destroying things, what kinds of things does she destroy and how does she typically do it?

[Kimono]

Phil the Time Wizard, on 25 July 2012 - 09:17 AM, said:

You're very close. The last thing in the app that seems to stand out to me is the line that says that she likes to destroy things. By nature, ponies tend to be fairly peaceful and non-destructive. That's not to say your character can't be an exception; for a character like her who is perhaps more quiet and nurturing, it could actually prove to be a quite interesting personality quirk to indulge in occasional destruction so long as it doesn't end up hurting anypony--I'm just left wondering why she enjoys destroying things, what kinds of things does she destroy and how does she typically do it?

Okay. Anything else?

[Phil the Time Wizard]

Okay. I finally know what I need to ask of you at this point. Sorry for the wait.

Something I overlooked in my initial critiques of this app was the physical appearance details. You say she has "long, curly purple streaks, glowing purple skin, a yellow heart on one of her legs" in the mane/markings section. While multi colored coats are fine within reason, we cannot allow for a pony's coat or mane to actually glow. It's not something we have a precedent of ever having really seen in the show, and it really just doesn't fit very well with the aesthetics of Friendship is Magic. The same goes for the heart mark on her leg; no ponies bear marks like that in FIM, and its just not something we want to allow on characters for our World of Equestria RP, which strives to stay true to the show.

Additionally, my seniors on the RP Helper team have requested I ask for a little more detail in the bulk of the app. Maybe just tell us a little more about the character and what she would be like to interact with? You don't need to go overboard, but just tell us a little more.

[Kimono]

Okay what now?

[Phil the Time Wizard]

The only thing I can think to say at this point is that under coat color it says pink but for the following field it says her skin is purple. As coat and skin would be the same for a pony, these should probably match.

[flutterscotch]

I think what she is trying to do is give the appearance that her coat is shimmering the way the toy did.  Could she accomplish it by having Kimono have the agouti gene (which horses have)?  Her underfur could be a much paler color than the very tips of her fur, and that would give the appearance of glowing slightly.  Not something that could be expressed in cartoon, or even photographs because it's subtle but it's pretty common in real life.

[Phil the Time Wizard]

flutterscotch, on 09 August 2012 - 02:19 PM, said:

I think what she is trying to do is give the appearance that her coat is shimmering the way the toy did.  Could she accomplish it by having Kimono have the agouti gene (which horses have)?  Her underfur could be a much paler color than the very tips of her fur, and that would give the appearance of glowing slightly.  Not something that could be expressed in cartoon, or even photographs because it's subtle but it's pretty common in real life.

It was the decision of one of the Senior RP Helpers upon looking at this application that any kind of glowing fur would not be approved.

Even if this character is based upon a toy, the World of Equestria RP is based upon the Equestria seen in the cartoon, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic; I don't think we're prepared to allow physical traits that cannot be adequately expressed in the art style of the cartoon.

[Kimono]

Okay I'm just going to take the glowing part out. Anything from here?

[Armony]