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Fire Bay [FINAL]


Kalpira

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MerPony-Maker-DollDivine_zpsef49e124.jpg

(if the fish fins aren't allowed, just tell me so so that I can remove them :))

Roleplay Type: Mane Equestria RP

Name: Fire Bay

Sex: Female

Age: Filly

Species: Hippocamp

Eye colour: Crystal Blue

Coat colour: Koi fish colours, named Showa in Japanese (reference here)

Mane/Tail/Markings colour & Style: Long flowy straight mane with three tones of red: very dark, normal red and light red). By the way, her tail fins are transparent red with black spots

Physique: Slender and elegant. Has koi fish fins close to her legs and a large membrane fin on her back. She has a chimera scratch scar on her left side.

Cutie Mark: A blue flame, representing water but at the same time a sinalization fire. Just like a lighthouse:

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Origin/Residence: She came from the deep seas of Equestria, and now she wanders everywhere, but prefers lakes

Occupation: Sailor helper and guider, like lighthouses do. However, she uses her beautiful voice instead of light and sings to guide them. During her free time, she enjoys to explore the bottom of the ocean and know the secrets of the ones who inhabit it together with her.

Motivation: Fire Bay's motivation is the safety of sailors or even pirates, and she wants to avoid the existence of castaway ponies in the Equestrian seas at all cost. She doesn't judge them even if they are pirates, because she cares more about their safety than their personality.

Likes: Lakes, fish, singing, animal sounds (because of her love for singing), nice scents

Dislikes: Ocean storms, thunders, pirates (even though she helps them, she keeps her ears back towards them)

Character Summary:

History – Fire Bay was born somewhere in the deep seas of Equestria, and not even she remembers it herself. However, as soon as she learned to swim properly, she swam up to the surface so that she could see the living creatures with a much better look on their faces and bodies. She was glad to be able to surface that way, because since the day she managed to go up, she explored the bright areas of the Equestria ocean, wondering what new relics she would find. With that same wondering, she popopped her head out of the water one day and found out what her true talent was ...

Parents – Fire Bay's mother is a pure white Hippocamp, who collects pearls from the bottom of the sea and sells them to the greedy or ambitious ponies back on land who enjoy them. Even though she sold them to other ponies, she neverliked that much to socialise, and wanted to teach her daughter the same things. However, that would soon reveal to be a failure, since Fire Bay wanted to do the opposite of living in isolation with her mother, only by themselves, in the bottom of the crystal clear ocean.

Fire Bay came to this world through a very peculiar way, in an adventure that happened to her mother ...

When she visited a lake one day in Canterlot when selling pearls to tailors related to very wealthy ponies, a very special speckled Hippocamp caught her eye. Of course she didn't want to talk that much, and just wnated to return to her beloved bottom of the sea, but that special Hippocamp seemed to hypnotise her, maybe for his coat, maybe by his pure actions while swimming in the lake. For days, she visited that same lake and told the Hippocamp stories about her adventures at the ocean, a thing that amazed the lake Hippocamp. Eventually, they fell in love and Fire Bay came along. Not much is known about Fire Bay's father, simply because he never left the lake he lived in even after Fire Bay's mother got pregnant because of his love for the critters living in that same spot and he was a very mysterious Hippoccamp. But she always believed he was a helper just like herself, and that she inherited his skills to guide other ponies throughout their journeys. Now both her parents live in her father's lake in Canterlot, while Fire Bay decided to explore the seas of Equestria left to her by her mother.

Cutie Mark Story – This sweet Hippocamp has always been very careful and gentle towards all the creatures she met and found. One special day, her head popped out of the water for the first time, and she caught sight of something she had never seen before in her life: ponies on the beach. But instead of flippers and fins, they had legs and some of them even had wings! That was something that amazed the young Hippocamp. Her mother didn't really want her to communicate or watch such sights, but Fire Bay couldn't help but to stare almost blankly at them with her pure crystaline eyes. Everytime she managed to catch her mother distracted or working, she would surface and hide in a rock to watch those creatures who were so similar to her.

But one stormy night, something truly weird happened right in the place she was swimming at. In her own ocean, her own home, those same ponies were falling and being unable to swim. She just couldn't believe her eyes ... With her gentle singing talents taught by her mother, she sang gently to them some soft melodies, and pulled them with the current and with herself to the beach. It was in that night that her mother saw what her true desire was, and explained her what a ship was. When she surfaced, she saw that same ship she was talking about : huge, majestic, with the once glorious sails now ripped by the storm. She knew it was her duty to guide that same ship to shore too when her mother nodded. She submerged, and swam close to the ship, where a very nervous and struggling Captain tried to keep the ship sailing in the wild waves. It seemed to be useless, so Fire Bay jumped by the ship boards and kept her dorsal fin way above the surface so that the ship could be correctly guided and lead to safe waters. Eventually it docked near the sand, and the whole crew survived thanks to the help of this very special Hippocamp. When she smiled at them, the exhausted Captain pointed at her body: searching for a moment, she found her new cutie mark, a blue flame symbolizing her guidance skills. When she looked back at the water, her mother was gone. Now she lives in the ocean waters of Equestria, simply because there are many more creatures in need for her help there than in lakes, where ponies simply like to relax and not explore wide lands that could be dangerous.

Her gentleness kept her a good name in the world of sailor ponies and even some land ponies, all of that because she felt so good for helping the ones that didn't belong to her natural element: water. Over the years as she grew up, she realized she was a little different from them, but instead of taking that as something bad she took advantage of it and taught everypony that was interested all of her oceanic stories. Her fire cutie mark represents exactly that, something that instead of harmful, is cozy and inviting, and allows one to want to find out more and feel safe in the presence of this Hippocamp.

Flaws – Even though Fire Bay is shy and kind, she has a few flaws. Unfortnately, she is extremely afraid of the new world in land, and it's still hard for her to walk among other ponies with all of them staring at her, her body and her coat. That is also due to her confrontation with a chimera in the Everfree Forest, the first place she visited since it was one of the places in Equestria with water. She managed to escape, but not without a mark on her side. She is extremely shy, and only seems to speak when needed.

Personality - Fire Bay is a very gentle and pure Hippocamp, that loves to take care of others. She is a free spirit, yes, but is still learning to open herself to others. She seems to live in her own little shell, and rarely shows what she thinks. When somepony gains her trust, she can reveal a very humorous part of herself, and once that trust is gained, one can have a friend for life and a great conselour. She ponders her words and sentences very carefully.

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Hello!

You friendly neighborhood RP Helpstaffer, Lux, here!

You have a really interesting character. I like the koi fis design and coloring. I also like the siren like aspect of using her music talent to help sailors.

Just a few things to do to make this app from good to great:

1) You mention that her mark represents a sinalization fire. Do you mean signalization as in a signal fire from a lighthouse?

2) Her preferance is ponds you say. ponds usually don't have outlets so they're stagnant and a re fed by underground streams. You might want to put your pony in a place like a lake for her to visit as a lake has an outlet.

3) I would ask you in the Parents section to remove Celestia's name, even though Fire's mother was selling the pearls to a tailor. We don't want to have a pony associated in any way with cast ponies. You can say that she met a tailor when she met her future husband.

4) Why does Fire not know much about her father? Did he pass away or left? You might want to expand on that as it's unclear what happened.

5)In the Cutie Mark section: about Err... I'm thinking you mean about.

6) A little confusion about where she lives. Does she still live where her father was in the pond (lake), or did she live in the sea? If she moved to the sea again, what made this happen?

7) Besides helping ponies on the sea, what are her other hobbies and past times?

Just a few small fixes and you'll be on your way to swimming and singing!

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Hello again.

Sorry for the wait.

One thing I would like to see is a little more history. For example: did Fire Bay and her mum live in an underwater city or by themselves? What made Fire want to guide ships in the first place? Is Fire considered wealthy or not? Just a few things to add and you'll be ready to go. The more stuff you put into your character's history, the more others will get tho know her.

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