Invitations so Inviting! (Snowfinder Marriage: See OOC)

[SteelEagle]

Pathfinder was really excited. Almost as excited as two weeks ago when it had all gone down on the rooftop of a Crystal Empire art gallery beneath the roving dragon-dream eating stars and the fireworks that lit the sky. That event was also closely followed by a really cool adventure she had with a sapient mountain that tried to eat her which was a story for another day. Another day in the future, not the past like tht one time she ate a flower that had certain properties that had her end up back in the time of Discord. He seemed oddly amused at her story before she was zapped back. Overall, this day was pretty cool to have ran all over that one like a stampede of really fat and excited chimeras trying to chow down on their flighty meal before it left their cave to go kiss the Snowfall pony all over.

And on account of all those special days spent kissing and/or dreaming and/or writing about and/or thinking about and/or talking to and/or snuggling with and/or avoiding the potential mother in law with, she had fallen in love with Snowfall and proposed. And she had accepted! BOO YAH. Somepony cynical might suggest it is because Snowfall was a massively wealthy CEO of a major tech corporation who could fund Pathfinder's 'lifestyle' and supply her with all sorts of stuff. And Pathfinder would be a dirty liar if she said that wasn't a pretty cool bonus but if anypony could spend more than five minutes with Snowfall and not fall madly in love then they simply weren't into mares. Which was fine, she wasn't judging or anything, but holy smokes was she smoking and smart and funny and unnnnfffff AHHHH SHE WAS SO EXCITED THEY WERE GONNA HAVE LIKE FIFTEEN FOALS. Maybe all of them would become ADVENTURE BUDDIES OH MY CELESTIA!

Anyway.

Before that, the wedding! And you had to have ponies and whatnot at weddings or no one could see it and then it would be weird since nopony would believe she married the radestical mare in the world. She needed witnesses. She needed ponies to party with. She needed guests, and she was traveling the known world to invite friends, enemies, frenemies, and ponies she had met once that didn't have restraining orders on her! First on her list was this super cool, super fair griffon she knew by the name of Falco! She called him Falki. He loved it!

The pawn shop was one of her favorite places to visit. She had a dohickey thingamajog and he paid well for dohickey thingamajigs. Sometimes she could get enough to eat at one of those fancy restaurants but normally she used what she got to get some water, hay, and lots of new equipment like a whole new strand of rope! Today she didn't have anything to sell him, though. She needed that enchanted crystal to break into the Room of a Thousand Surfaces, after all. But she did have something for him. She flew into the door with a loud smack and then got back up, opening it all in a flash. Pathfinder trotted in, face aglow, smiling that smile of smiles.

“Heya Falki! How're ya doing? Got any magical talismans for me?!”

[Bellosh]

Just another day at Gems & Trinkets for Falco Kestrelson. Business in Beakbreak City remained quite strong as more and more international commerce opened up between Equestria and lands to the west. In fact, he was getting a regular supply of pawned-off items from Saddle Arabia and Maretonia these days, which meant a more unique stock for regular patrons to shop from.

Yet the pony who smacked her way into Falco’s establishment was no mere customer. That Daring Do-lookalike was Pathfinder, perhaps the only pony in the world who shared the pawn shop owner’s passion for reckless adventuring. There was a very good reason why the griffon ex-marine named Pathfinder his honorary niece! “Ha ha ha!” Falco cried out from behind the counter; “Pathy!!! Heh, glad to see you’re still flyin’ around in one piece! The shop’s been doin’ great- oh wait, I’ve got somethin’ to show ya...”

Mr. Kestrelson opened up a glass display behind him filled with the most valuable items currently up for sale at Gems & Trinkets, typically those with significant historical value. The griffon found one wood amulet, depicting a stone tower, and brought it over to Pathfinder; “You know those enchanted things where you recite an inscription and it whisks ya’ away to an imaginary world? Well this here is one of the first of those babies that ever got made! Crafted right in Maretonia, I’ll tell ya’ what. Anyway, if you say the words on the backside, you get transported into this featureless white room, with nothin’ in it! Ha ha ha, pretty imaginative, eh kiddo?”

[SteelEagle]

Falco the Griff-o knew all about the cool adventuring stuff she did and he knew what spoke to her cackling heart, full of verve and stupidity and the desire to do good by the most Daring of Do'ers. The Maretonian Quantum Amulets were a rare sight outside of that land and for extremely good reasons. Only in the Unicorn city of Kastrot is the aetheral connection so rawly treated and magical power so fine tuned to allow the reality-shaping capabilities of the amulet to be allowed to function. It took dozens of high-level shapers and creators weeks to create the structure of a single one, and then they needed to get the aid of other ponies of different species to fill it up with their own raw magic, all of which could only be done in Maretonia by Maretonians. Only a few hundred existed and only a hoof full could be found outside of museums or the rich and fabulous. Except for Falkie!

“Holy Smokesasaurus!” Pathfinder bellowed as she took the amulet in her hoof and played with it, “these things are totally super nice. What would happen if I-” Pathfinder said before she blinked out of existence, the amulet falling to the ground with a light dull thud of heavy wood on the floor. After a few seconds, Pathfinder blinked back into existence, her whole face flush and quaking and her backleg and tail twitching excitedly. She picked the amulet back up. “it totally works, too! Just like all the others. Wow, who knew that kraken had such memories and sharp teeth! Next time I visit them I'll take a pen and paper so I can capture their mating rituals for posterity,” Pathfinder giggled before giving Falco his amulet back. As much as she liked it, she didn't have the bits.

“You should get three of them and have all three try to fight one another in a joint reality space thing stuff. That'd be cool! Speaking of cool, I have a gift for yoooooooooooooou,” She said, pulling something out of her saddlebag, “and this time you really really really really really won't know what it is! And I mean-mean it this time. I'm still sorry about that Ruby Claw. I didn't know it was legally owned by the Star Scream family. Honest to goodness! Oh, and about the enchanted wood that turned out to be sapient. That also totes mcgots caught me off guard too. But anyway, gggguuuuueeeessssss what I have for yooooooou!”

[Bellosh]

Ho ho! Pathfinder was always the sort of excitable big filly who didn’t think twice before trying out magical artifacts. It was amazing to see how in only mere seconds, a pegasus could vanish in a flash only to reemerge right back! Still though, she could probably stand to be a little bit more careful with the amulet. That thing was worth a lot of money to Falco after all. Without further delay, the feathered pawn shop owner took his item (which thankfully suffered no damage from the impact with the ground) back inside the glass display.

Meanwhile, Pathfinder rattled on about all the scraps she got herself into over the years; exciting stories all of them. Oh, and she had a gift for Uncle Falco too! The griffon always loved getting gifts, especially surprise ones... but he had to guess it first! Knowing Pathy, it was either some object she swiped from a tomb, or a Daring Do collectible. Quite a few of the latter were stashed in Gems & Trinkets’ storage room. Falco, being a jovial guy, felt like joking around with the guessing game first; “Ha ha, I know what it is! You finally swiped that fedora off ole’ Merlie’s head, didn’t you?!”

[SteelEagle]

Pathfinder let out an impish giggle at the thought of swiping that snob's hat. It probably stank of failure and an incredible ability to get in the way of a good time. And of too much polish and cologne as he tried to impress mares way out of his league. Could Merlot even date? Oh well. She'd have to invite him anyway. Maybe Pathfinder could steal his hat then instead, right in the middle of the reception! She'd have to make sure that where he was sitting was near open sky so she could zip and zoom away from him. Falco gave her such cool ideas! He should writing an adventurer's helpful tips guide he was so good. He said he was a marine but she always had a sneaking suspicion he had adventured some in his youth because he always had triple A plus suggestions for her.

“Naaawwwww, not a hat! I sorta wish I had his hat though. It'd be really cool to take his hat and distract him from the magical jackhammer I have that is about to go off and get through yet another vault. Could you believe he hired dart-blowers to poison me? Pssh. It's like he thinks there is a poison out there that I haven't had, silly ol' Merlot,” Pathfinder chuckled as she started to hover in place. After a pregnant pause she quickly pulled the invite out and slapped it on the table like it was a notice of jury duty...IN SPACE. “I'm getting super married to Snowfall and you're invited! There's going to be dresses and guards and changelings and even Snowfall! We're gonna have cake and its gonna be CHOCOLATE! I haven't had chocolate cake that wasn't sapient and trying to control my mind in over two years. Yay for cake! For marriage! For Snowy!”

[Bellosh]

Falco enjoyed a good chuckle about Pathfinder’s reminisces about Merlot, although he did have some unclely advice to impart; “Be careful what you say about Merlie in public, Pathy. Ha ha ha, remember that time when you accused him of black market antiquities trading? Merlie had his legal goon squad ambush ya’ with a summons at the following Daring Do convention! Boy, that had to be one of your best escape stories of all time!!! Heh heh... lawyers.” Like most sensible people, Mr. Kestrelson was no fan of lawyers.

There wasn’t more time to chat on about stupid ole’ Merlot though, because Pathfinder shockingly announced that she and her fillyfriend Snowfall were going to get married! Falco was in shock; even though he thought Pathy was totally awesome when others didn’t think so, the griffon never believed his honorary niece’s tales of wooing a big-shot CEO of Stalliongrad’s biggest tech firm. What would a cold Stallian mare of business logically have to do with a free-spirited eternal vagabond like Pathfinder?

Falco assumed all along that Pathy was making the whole thing up as a joke or a tall tale, which in all honesty was quite alright. Every good story needed exaggerations now and then; even that famous rodeo star Calamity Mane says so! And so Falco simply let his mare pal have her harmless fun, never bothering to call her out on her supposed tall tales. But a wedding... maybe Pathy’s vivid imagination was finally getting ahead of itself. Unable to separate fiction from reality.

“Uhhhhhhh, Pathfinder?” the dumbstruck griffon finally mustered a response; “Did you drink any cactus juice on the way here? I thought this whole fillyfriend business of yours was just some good ole’ fashioned fibbin’.....”

[SteelEagle]

She sure remembered that time! Of course it wasn't the first time nor would it be the last that Pathfinder had been sued by a no-good bad-doer on account of her very shamelessly public accusations backed up with less proof than sheer gusto. She'd been sued for all sorts of litigative causes but none of them ever stuck to her, mostly because she didn't pay attention and you couldn't get blood out of a turnip. Other times he dropped the suit when he had to defend himself from criminal charges on account of what evidence Pathfinder could conjure up from the deep depths of his own personal misdeeds, which were plentiful and egregious enough to force him to move once or twice when the heat was turned up One specific time stuck out in her mind as a particularly entertaining experience and one she hoped to repeat soon if his WRAITH connections were ever proven true enough for the heat to return.

“Hahaha, well they say the best defense is a good offense, right? Well the best way to defend yourself from charges if you're an adventurer is to adventure right at the one suing you! Found a dig of his that he had hired some goons for and got the Diamond of Calnais from him. His goons chased me all the way to Fet Loch where they finally caught up to me. The leader was so mad he revealed the whole plan in front of everypony! See, bad guys are dumb. He had to abandon his case against me to defend himself from the Prancian authorities and their charges. While he was gone I actually infiltrated his hidden vault and recovered all sorts of good stuff and I was only poisoned three times because of it. Hoofed those over and boom, insta-hero among the museum community. Well, some. I might have broken something. Not sure, was poisoned,” Pathfinder rambled excitedly. Hopefully all of this would happen again because she heard he had found the Breastplate of Unicornia. She wanted it!

She also wanted her Falco honorary uncle to stop being such a kidder. He knew Pathfinder never ever lied. If she was wrong it was because of something a little more insidious than an overactive imagination and love of adventure. Sometimes she saw stuff that wasn't there but that was because of various poisons in her system. You'd think by now she would have been poisoned enough to be immune to all of them, but it was only the majority that she had resistance to. Some poisons also turned you into leaves and as interesting as that one was she wasn't sure there was immunity to be had. It did retroactively make her feel real bad for using those trees' leaves to wipe when she had used hte bathroom previously, however. Anyway, Falco needed to stop kidding which was made evident by Pathfinder's momentary pause followed by many guffaws. Cactus juice or not, he was coming along for the ride.

“Oh you! I had a little cactus juice on the way over here because I was so excited about visiting everypony and creature I know to invite them to my wedding that I totally forgot to bring water! Gosh, I used to hate cactus juice but now I really like it. I think it may be because of the Cactus God trying to convince me to stay in the Grand Patch of Thorns to protect them all, but it could be because its so fruity and bitter. Anywho, ore important matters: The wedding! You're gonna love it. In case stuff starts kicking off really bad I gave you a chair near an open door. That way you can get out of there before Snowfall activates some sort of high tech device to neutralize everypony that is turning into zombies. I'm so excited for you two to meet! She is fun loving and sweet and funny and really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really pretty! You gotta promise to not fall in love with her, though. It's super hard but I'd be really sad if she instead married somepony or griffon else. Promise, all right?”

[Bellosh]

Oh darn, Pathfinder really did drink some no-good cactus juice before coming here. Falco was just surprised to see his pegasus pal not displaying any serious signs of hallucinating, now that would have been a huge problem. Instead, Pathy seemed to be merely suffering from standard-fare delusions. What mare out there would agree to a wedding with changelings and mad scientist doomsday devices?

And yet, maybe there was something about the situation that Falco hadn’t caught on to. Sure, Pathfinder possibly embellished a few details of her stories every now and then to increase entertainment value, but she never made junk up out of complete thin air. Neither was she the prankster type; Pathy wouldn’t be the sort of pony who’d deliver invitations to a wedding that wasn’t real. And yet, the point remained that Snowfall of Stalliongrad was just about the last mare on this earth who’d agree to marrying the griffon’s honorary niece.

With that in mind, Falco’s mind came to the most obvious conclusion available. “You know Pathy,” the griffon hesitantly spoke his mind; “Did ya’ ever stop and consider that somepony, or something, may be tryin’ to pull a fast one on ya’? I find it rather hard to believe that the CEO of the Northern Storm Industries would marry you, Equestria’s most die-hard Daring-Do copycat. Sounds like to me that you’ve fallen for a crafty changeling scam. I heard those monsters are quite good at imitating ponies, if you know what I’m sayin’.”

[SteelEagle]

Changelings were ALWAYS a possibility when there was a marriage involving the prettiest of mares such as Snowfall. For all of their talk about just being after love Pathfinder believed changelings were actually big fat liars and were after beauty. Why weren't the weddings of really ugly ponies getting hit? Didn't they love one another just as much? Naaaahhhhh. They were all liars at heart and secretly just wanted to be pretty pony Princesses and CEOs like Snowfall because they were normally ugly bugponies. She couldn't blame them really. If she wasn't able to pull off the Daring Do look then she'd try to pull off the Snowfall look because who wouldn't want to look that amazing all the time? As long as it didn't interfere with a good adventure then it was fine by her.

She used to be a bit more militant when it came to rough and tough adventure looks but from the first time her heart was caught over a tourist trap in the Gulch her views had started to change. Now Snowfall could be a Snowfall and Snowfall all over and it would be fine by Pathfinder as long as she didn't try to get Pathie into a dress. Yikes, talk about a disaster. What was she going to wear? She had been promised no dresses but she had also been promised no kissing in front of the press last time they were out and that happened, so who knew what could happen. And speaking of- he wanted proof, she had them. Pathfinder quickly dug into her saddlebag and grabbed a collection of tabloids with provocative headlines about her and Snowy as well as a locket of her mane.

“Now come on now you big goof! Why would a Changeling wanna impersonate Snowfall to get ME? Snowfall is worth at least two Pathfinders! But you're right to be worried about changeling impersonation. When I first started kissing her and stuff I actually took a locket of her mane. If a Changeling tries to take her place I'll notice because they can't copy stuff like that. And if you look at all these magazines, you'll see her mane is as it should be!” Pathfinder said, shoving the tabloids proudly In his face despite the at times lurid headlines screaming loudly, so loudly maybe he didn;t need it directly in his eyeball.

[Bellosh]

Ick, tabloids! Why would any self-respecting male or female lower themselves to reading brain-killing celebrity gossip? Only idiots read that stupid trash! Them, and most likely lawyers too after each day of legal leechcraft. Just another reason to despise them. Falco’s face impulsively begin to express irrational fury at the sight of the tabloid publications showed by Pathfinder when the headlines caught his eye:

NSI INSIDERS: SNOWFINDER “A TRAVESTY”

MILLIONAIRE INDUSTRIALIST SET TO WED PENNILESS LOONY

SNOWFALL ADMITS LOVE FOR DARING DO COPYCAT

NSI’S CEO EXPOSES ALL

All of the magazines showed some sort of picture of NSI’s CEO on the front cover; that last one titled “Treasure” had Snowfall pose a bit more... provocative than Falco felt necessary. Of course, that mag was an issue of Manestyle Magazine, which was more of a mare’s lifestyle publication than a true tabloid. But the periodical before that (the “Copycat” one) really caught the griffon’s interest; clear as day on the cover was a prettied-up Snowfall on a fancy red carpet accompanied by no other than Pathfinder, dirty outfit and all! Holy cow, this was the REAL DEAL!!!

“Well I’ll be darned!” Falco’s eyes popped out, first at the cover and then at his buddy; “You weren’t kiddin’ about baggin' Snowfall at all!” In his excitement, the ex-marine swiftly turned the pages to a Snowfall article and spedread it, verbally repeating the first quote that grabbed his interest; "Untamed and beautiful; my Pathfinder both completes me and inspires me to soar."

Finally, Falco Kestrelson allowed his beak to smile proudly; “Pathy, remind me to never doubt you again.” Without further delay, the griffon flew over to Pathfinder and wrapped one clawed arm around her; his other arm got through into Pathy’s mane and ruffled it all right up. “I can’t believe it, ha ha! My honorary niece’s gonna’ get tied down to a lovely mare. You lucky rascal; no more solo adventurin’ for ya', pal.” Already, Falco’s eyes were watering up with liquid pride.

[SteelEagle]

He ruffled her mane up something fierce but she was right behind him in the act of mane ruffling, patting him on the head so roughly she hoped she didn't break his griffon head. Of course they had very hard heads to break which was something that was a severe disadvantage to her in the Oubliette. She would try and fight but bucking them in the head didn't provide the prefered result. No matter! She gave her Falco a big ol' smooch on the cheek and a hug. She then screamed in super excited fangirl mode, except now it was super excited engaged mode. They were just about the same octave.”You should always believe in me, silly! I've only gone overboard with my stories a few dozen times or so,” She said, laughing as she pulled away.

“Well, I gotta stock up some other time I suppose. I actually have a few stallions trailing me. I think they're ninjas, ready to attack me for defiling a sacred temple or something. Or they're lawyers. Yuck! I prefer the ninjas, easier to get away from. I gotta get away from them and then deliver more of these invites! Love ya Falco!” Pathfinder stated as she waved goodbye and headed out of the shop. Boy howdy did she have so many options. Griffons, royals, changelings, caribou and some Maretonians. Hopefully only a few of then tried to eat her and hopefully none of them aside from the griffons were counted among that group. Hahaha, her first three targets were all griffons! So weird? What was it about Pathfinder and meat eating carnivoricals that just meshed so well? Time to find out...

[Bellosh]

The pony and the griffon didn’t have much time to celebrate. Pathfinder sadly had pursuers on her tail, or so she claimed. Plus more invites to personally send out. All that was left for Falco to do was wave goodbye and quietly reply; “Heh, love ya’ too Pathy.” And just like that, the pegasus adventurer took off. For Falco, it was back to the day-to-day activity of running the pawn store. Oh, and wondering what the heck the griffon would wear to the wedding. Looks like he was due for a day at the tux rental shop.....

*EXIT FALCO*

[SteelEagle]

Pathfinder continued her delivery of wedding invitations abroad, hitting up most hospitals on her way to Stalliongrad. Strange how an adventure could leave you so broken physically and so happy mentally! Of course finding some cool treasure along the way was important and knowing you deserved it after a great day of cave spleunking and trap-tripping was a salve for the spirit. You could heal super quick if you had a crystal with strange powers as a reward for your effort, after all. Maybe you could even think it was helping you heal! That was only sometimes true. It was just as likely to create an evil clone of yourself It depended mostly on what sort of adventure you were on though and where you went. If you went someplace wild, expect a wild reward for your adventurehood! And she certainly had a lot of rewards for her adventuring besides the many high quality bone breaks as a result of traps.

In fact, she was tip-hooving her way across one of the most familiar of adventure zones she had could conceive of, one that had given her the best reward of her life. The hallways and their guards held no surprises, patterns learned over dozens and dozens of trips informing her relentlessly as she made her way towards her goal. She had started where she normally would try to end her visit and after exploring the crevices and creases of a familiar mark she was going to find something a little more experience-savvy and dangerous to test. She hopped from one corner to another, jumped behind pots and hid behind paintings and leaped over unsuspecting guards...or were they just servants? She preferred to think that Snowfall's mansion was being guarded excessively all the time but chances are they were just getting soup or something. No matter! Point was they couldn't stop her from her super secret mission of importance.

And that was delivering a wedding invitation to snowmom! See, for some reason Pathfinder couldn't understand, Snowfall wasn't all about giving her mom a wedding invitation. She knew she had to but she didn't want to actually do it, which all seemed super silly to Pathfinder but heck, that was her mare. A bit silly all the time! So Snowy was going to go ahead and invite Merlot- which was fortuitous since Merlot had hired some assassins for Pathfinder recently- and Pathfinder would get Snowmom! Boom, bam, woom. Which sounded not at all like the music Crystal was listening to as Pathfnder popped open her door slowly. Ah, just as she had planned it- Snowmom was lost in some new fashion catalog sent to only the wealthiest ponies in ponydom. Good times! Pathfinder fluttered lazily and silently over towards her as the classical music that buffeted the room reached a crescendo, ending just after pathfinder landed behind Snowmom. She didn't waste any time.

“Hey there Crystal! Whatcha readin'?” Pathfinder said, sticking her snout over the shoulder to take a peek. “Oooh, you'd like really nice in that I think maybe!”

[RarityDash]

Snowfall did not want to be there. It was entirely illogical and bizarre for her to be there. She couldn't imagine what she was going to say. She couldn't rightly begin to even know if it was capable for her to do what she was there to do. She had to at least try however. it was Pathfinder's wish after all.

Dr. Merlot was a snake. She was ashamed of herself for ever having been involved with him, for ever having found any small part of his act charming, though she could not deny that for a time she had. He had after all, been interesting where most of the stallions her mother had set her with had been dreadful bores. There had been something in him which had kept her engaged for months before the immaculately polished outer layers of his slimy self started to peel back. She was glad to cut him out of her life, and found it an endlessly amusing irony that her true love so often played the part of the thorn in his side.

Snow did not want Merlot at her wedding. It was insane to her... but Pathfinder would have it no other way. She saw Merlot as her rival, the Caballeron to her Daring Do. He was important to her in his own way and Pathfinder wanted those important to her to be at her wedding. The only problem was that Pathfinder would not be allowed near to him. She claimed that there were assassins, though Snow somehow doubted this was the case. it was more likely she was just known to Merlot's enforcers and they would keep her from him at all times. Snow hopes so at least; if Merlot had truly hired assassins for Pathfinder, he was even more loathsome and impossible than she could have imagined.

Whatever the case, Snowfall had the power to get to him. She was also pretty sure knowing the good Dr. Merlot, that she had a better chance of getting him to come in the first place. She was prepared to try at least, and for it she had come to Manehattan, to his office, where she was being lead by a pair of oversized bodyguards to the good doctor. It had not been hard to arrange a meeting. Even disregarding their history together, NSI had a fine reputation, and as CEO it wasn't like she would be turned away when she came seeking to make a "business proposal". In time, she found herself before him. She stepped toward his dexk cautiously.

"It's been a long time..." she said in a low voice. "There are matters which we must discuss, Merlot," she added, her expression somewhat severe as she eyed him from where she stood. She was not pleased to be doing what she was doing--though she could only imagine it being preferable to the task which lay before Pathfinder.

​

----

Crystal Snowflake halfheartedly hummed and hawed as she flipped through the pages of her favorite fashion catalog. She had not been in the best of moods of late, mostly on account of the news. The attack on the Crystal Empire was of course the big story, and it was a troubling thing. Sudden destructive happenings in the north, merciless invaders, dark magics--it was hard not to hear it and think about Northern, and all the rumors that had been spun across the several years since his disappearance. It was clearly a troubled time Equestria was now perhaps entering.

It certainly wasn't time for Crystal's daughter to be making the most absurdly wrong decision of her life, but that's what was apparently happening. Snowfall had said little about it to Crystal herself, but it was being run in all the papers. it was hard not to hear about it, especially not with friends and associates of hers stopping her with congratulations. Crystal didn't see much to celebrate.

Early on, Crystal had assumed her entirely too wilful daughter was just choosing to rebel against her--perhaps making up for her more obedient youth. Dissatisfied with all the fine and eligible stallions from good families and respectable careers, Snowfall had went out of her way to find the most distressingly wrong pony in all of Equestria to play the part of her lover. The character known as Pathfinder, she was just too much of an absurd buffoon to rightly be believed as genuine, and she was not very often around. It was easy to just assume that she was some clown Snowfall had paid to come around every so often just to frustrate her. I was, she had thought, all just mind games, or a phase. Something Snowfall would abandon for reason before very long.

Then comes the article right square in the Canterlot Chronicle and Crystal is stunned. Marriage? Was this for real. Forget about the invasion. The true disaster happening in the news was Snowfall agreeing to this lunatic's proposal. She could already imagine the fallout from investors as the frightening details of what this Pathfinder pony was like actually started to become apparent to them all. Their stock prices were bound to take a major hit. It made her wonder if SNowfall even thought about her actions at all.

The sound of a voice speaking to her as she read inside her manor, caused Crystal to look up from her catalog. She was shocked to discover none other than Pathfinder herself standing just near to her. Her eyes narrowed behind her small glasses.

"What are you doing in my home uninvited?" she asked through a cold huff. "I have a mind to see you ejected from these premises, post haste." she said, slamming the catalog down on a side table immediately.

​

[SteelEagle]

Crystal Snowmom had a very awesomesauce authority laden tone whenever she spoke to Pathfinder. It made Pathfinder's mane stand on end...metaphorically speaking, anyway. It was really super adorable. Maybe one day Snowfall would have that same tone, hardened and yet still totally feminine. Not that she really needed to change at all. Snowfall had the cutest most perfect voice ever, and she had heard genie voices designed to entrance and subdue the mind of lesser ponies. Would Snowfall ever get Snowmom's pretty wings? Well, nah. Because Snowfall had even prettier and bigger wings that she loved to cuddle in for warmth and lovin'. What about those eyes? Snowmom had pretty eyes. But even there Snowfall had even prettier and very alluring eyes that made Pathfinder turn into a puddle of loving goodness. All things told, maybe Pathfinder didn't need to study Snowmom because Snowfall would always be beautiful to Pathfinder.

Though it did make Pathfinder wonder why Snowfall didn't just invite her mom herself. Surely Snowfall was really excited to see her mom get really excited when she found out the good news! No, the great news! When she found out the GREAT news! Maybe parents could get awkward when they found out their fillies and colts were getting married and did weird things. Pathfinder didn't know how that relationship really worked out. Her parents were long, long gone and she couldn't even tell you anything about them besides that which was known. She knew their names and what they did but they had been a flight team so devoted to work that they had few close friends. She didn't know what a normal parent-foal relationship was and she never really would until she had some of her own. The closest she had was the orphanage director and headmaster, neither of which she thought were good role models for that sort of interaction. Of course, she still planned on inviting them as well!

“Oh, no need to worry about that! Snowfall invited me in. I've been with her for SEVERAL HOURS!” Pathfinder was being super sly with that comment, of course. She was almost too sly to be real, slick like slime on a rock. “So, I seeeee you've been reading a bit and that sorta ruins the surprise we have for yooooou buuuuut...” she started bouncing up and down on all four hooves, “oh its so exciting I could BURST! Snowfall and I are going to get...MARRIED!” she shaked a bit and then gave Snowmom a huge hug, peppering her with friendly kisses, “I bet you're really excited! Your face is turning so many colors! Awww!” she pulled away, thinking super hard now. They had a lot of stuff to prepare for the wedding and her mind was still sort of addles by a snake bite. “So, serious question...what sort of ice cream do you want at the wedding? Also, how excited are you to be a grandmare?!”

[Bellosh]

 

“Business proposal”? Did Snowfall really believe that Dr. Merlot would be taken for a fool that easily? The only logical reason for Northern Storm Industries to do business with the good archaeologist was to get tax write-offs by donating to his research efforts. And Merlot knew Snowfall well enough that she’d never agree to that sort of arrangement in a million years. Not when both ponies had good reasons to despise the other. No, there had to be an ulterior motive for Snowfall daring to show her face here, one that the stallion couldn’t discern for the life of him.

 

Even though Merlot had more important things to do than chat it up with the girlfriend of a thieving feathered rat, morbid curiosity prevented him from simply telling his secretary that the Stallian CEO wasn’t welcome. To see Snowfall come all the way to Manehattan to talk to an ex-stallionfriend that she so thoroughly despised, and not even ask to know why she bothered with the effort... wasn’t that a major crime in of itself? Maybe somehow, this would all be worth the gentlecolt’s while?

 

Being in a amused mood, Merlot granted permission for Snowfall to step into his office. Unlike his usual public self, the stallion made no effort to dress himself in anything fancier than his undershirt and die, or to display high-class courtesy to acknowledge the mare’s arrival. Nor did Merlot bother to even look up from his papers; he wanted to give the impression of how utterly unimportant he considered his former lover to be. “Do sit down on the chair, Ms Snowfall,” Merlot instructed nonchalantly; “I trust you have a good reason for taking my valuable time?”

[RarityDash]

Snowfall let out a small sigh. She was not entirely unsurprised by the coldness of his tone. Her feelings toward him were not truly any warmer when all was said and done. She didn't want to be there, and it was pretty clear from his appearance and the way he spoke to her that he didn't want her to be there either. She stayed standing even as he offered her a chair and just stared at him.

 

"I'll make this quick, for both of our sakes," Snowfall said as she reached into the pocket of her business suit. "I am here to deliver this to you and make sure you've read and consider it," she said as she placed a small envelope addressed to Merlot upon his desk.

 

Inside was a professionally printed wedding invitation--fine embossed floral border, pastel blue paper. Printed in a fancy script, large and centered were the names "Snowfall & Pathfinder" in large text. In smaller text just under it read "request the honor of your presence" followed by a date, time and location.

 

"I know this all may seem ridiculous, Merlot, and I'd be lying if I said I didn't see how it is... but I have reason to believe the message enclose could not have reached you without me being here personally to ensure that id did," she added before he could open and read the invitation.

​

 

---

Crystal stared at the bizarre character in front of her as she spoke and then started to invade her personal space. What exactly could Snowfall possibly see in this pony? She was, by all accounts an incomparable fool. This became clear in mere moments of knowing her. All of it was just utterly mystifying to the point where Crystal still sometimes hoped it was all some elaborate and terrible joke.

 

"I had thought my dear, confused daughter had been called away to Manehattan on business..." she said, not reacting outwardly to many of the things the pony said.

 

"As for your marriage, do you expect me not to know yet, when it's already in newspapers as far south as Canterlot?" she said, unblinkingly. "And I cannot say I share your enthusiasm, when I'd sooner see Snowfall married to that dragon which apparently kidnapped her.." she added bluntly.

 

The most infuriating thing about this Pathfinder was how she could preface the most ridiculous things she could possible ask with the label "serious question". Completely ignoring the subject of ice cream, she gave a sigh. "So long as your influence on them is kept at a minimum, the idea of new progeny is not unappealing. If there is even the faintest chance that one might come into this family who has not completely lost their mind, I would welcome it."

​

[SteelEagle]

 

Snow's mom was a hoot and a holler. Look at her trying to play at being the unhappy mother in law. She was probably really killer on the dance floor and was gonna bust a move or three at the wedding, blowing everypony's minds. If Pathfinder had learned anything it was that SnowFamily was just chockful of surprises. She was a bit slow on the uptick though, probably because Pathfinder was such a sly cat that nopony could see through her epic moves of secretness. Poor Snowmom was dealing with a mental ninja (who was really an adventurer) and she didn't know how to handle it! It was pretty darn charming no matter what. She had a solid sense of humor too. Craven the dragon marrying Snowfall? Yuke! That guy smelled like soot and fire all the time! Total and complete uggo. Pathfinder snorted with laughter as Snowmom continued, finally throwing her leg around Snowmom. Snowmom was the silliest mare this side of the Crimsonrine!

 

“Oh, stop being so silly willy! You know Snowfall couldn't marry that dragon. Craven has at least six times as many serious felonies on his record than I do and he doesn't even adventure! How boring would that be, yikes? Plus I totally beat his butt to rescue her. Hey, maybe this is one of those fairy tales where the dashing hero rescues the beautiful maiden to win her hoof at marriage? If so, I NAILED it!” Pathfinder pumped her hoof in the air as she hovered off the ground a few inches, bringing Snowmom with her before settling back down. She wiped her eyes, her laughter bring some weird salty secretion to her face that she didn't understand, “Craven's a total wuss, anyway. Picking on adorable mares- yeesh! What an L-O-Z-U-R. He ain't even as smart as me neither!” She laughed some more, patting Snowmom on the head, “so don'tcha worry, your daughter will be safer and more sounderer than she could be anywhere else. And that includes here since your guards take lots of naps.”

 

She tittered a bit before thinking about what Snowfall was up to now. “Oh, she left a while ago. After we were finished discussing something and...gosh how did she say it...arrange to trip the light fantastical...or something...she left to go hoof out an invite to Merlot. I would but I think he still has assassins out for me. Next time you're all smoochy-smoochy with him, tell him to send better assassins, not more. I swear I'm dying of boredom! Speaking of smoochy-smoochy, here's the invite!” Pathfinder bellowed as she hoofed it over. It wasn't even in an envelope- Pathfinder didn't see why you had to use an envelope if you were going to literally hoof it over directly. It was a professionally printed wedding invitation--fine embossed floral border, pastel blue paper. Printed in a fancy script, large and centered were the names "Snowfall & Pathfinder" in large text. In smaller text just under it read "request the honor of your presence" followed by a date, time and location. “As for foals, I was thinking of naming a filly Star Blazer! Or Flakey Bake! Snowypoo stuffed my face full of cake when I suggested that one. I think that means she likes it. Those are pretty good names, huh?”

[Bellosh]

 

Dr. Merlot let Snowfall drone on as he read the contents of the letter. So... the rumors were true. Snowfall did intend to wed the most loathsome grave robber Equestria has ever seen. If Snowfall was in love with any other pony, Merlot wouldn’t have cared in the slightest. The gentlecolt did treat mares as disposable pleasures to be shooed away once they’ve started boring him. But Merlot thought that was a grave misjustice that as a reward for all the losses that deadbeat Pathfinder inflicted upon him, that pegasus thief ended up rewarded with the love of a beautiful and rich lady. That simply wasn’t how the universe was intended to work.

 

And for whatever scatterbrained reason, Pathfinder (clearly this prank wasn’t Snowfall’s idea) saw fit to invite Merlot, the one pony who hated her most of all, to her wedding. The stallion only had one dry, sarcastic comment to make as he kept his gaze towards the invitation; “I see Pathfinder is so desperate for wedding guests that she’s been forced to invite me, of all ponies.....” That made Merlot think; who would debase themselves enough to attend the wedding? Surely not anypony worth knowing, maybe not even Snowfall’s mom.

 

.....Crystal Snowflake. Outside the archaeological field, Mrs. Snowflake was perhaps the one pony Merlot respected the most. Nopony else among the Equestrian elite seemed to maintain as high standards of propriety and decency as Mrs. Snowflake did. Probably because she needed to compensate for her daughter doing everything in her power to squander her family’s good reputation. In his way, Merlot felt genuine sympathy for the elder mare’s deplorable situation. Expressing uncharacteristic concern, the gentlecolt looked up at Snowfall at last and softly asked; “I presume Mrs. Snowflake has not taken the news well?”

[RarityDash]

Snowfall just sighed deeply and shot a blank look at Merlot. "There will be no shortage of guests, Merlot," she said. "I can assure you of that. I would have it be a private, modest affair, but Pathfinder insists on doing it as big as possible. If you do come, you will be far from alone to suffer there."

 

The mare glanced indifferently at the wall behind the stallion and then found a second sigh. "She invited you, because, in her own way, Pathfinder thinks highly of you. She respects you and how you challenge her and to her your presence is something important," she said, wondering how he would react to it being said.

 

She closed her eyes and chuckled. "Honestly, it always seemed to me more than what you're worth. To see her pleased on the day of our wedding though, I would like to see you make the time."

 

Snow laughed again at the thought of her mother, who Pathfinder would be approaching at about that same time. Her mother glowed when she talked about the good Dr. Merlot, who evidently she had seen even since he and Snow had broken up. "Of course my mother is not pleased, but I've long since abandoned the thought of pleasing her as an impossible cause. It's Pathfinder, actually, who will be asking her to come..."

​

 

---

 

Crystal stared blankly, disbelieving what she was hearing. Was this pony really this imbecilic? If Snowfall wanted to play the rebel, that was fine--but to marry this creature, it was a sure sign of madness. There was just no tolerating her.

 

"I was being facetious about the dragon, you fool," Crystal snapped, plainly irritated. "If this dragon was truly bested by you then surely it is an even more pitiable creature than I can imagine."

 

It was difficult for Crystal to believe that this pony could have saved anyone from any variety of dragon, honestly. She often wondered if the whole event hadn't been a staged attempt at building sympathetic press either for Snowfall or her chosen lover.

 

"Merlot..." Crystal started as the name was said, though her eyes then narrowed at the suggestions the pony had the audacity to make. "I'll have you know that our relationship is purely professional. The doctor is a good friend of mine, who in exchange for financing gives me a choice of some of the fine things he might collect on his digs." She said with a huff, blushing a little. Truth be told, she wouldn't mind for there to be more. Dr Merlot was ultimately charming and upright--about the very opposite of the simpleton there before her now.

 

She sighed then as she took the invitation and read it. What a meaningless thing. Could Snow not have given her the details in person? She was her mother after all. At the very least, she supposed it did somewhat surprise her to see this Pathfinder inviting her so formally with an invitation. Perhaps in some things she could be taught.

 

Crystal's thoughts didn't stay there for long, thanks to Flakey Bake. She glowered at the pony and then threw the invitation back at her. "of all the impossibly terrible--" She gave another loud huff and shook her head, reminding herself that Snowfall at least, had to have more sense with such things. Star Blazer, at least, was almost acceptable adequate...

​

[SteelEagle]

 

Pathfinder was really happy to have Crystal Snoweyflakey as her soon to be step mother. No, not step mother. Mother in law. Very different. It was hard to keep track of this mother and that mother. They should just come up with brand new names and terms for this stuff, not just add words to pre-existing words. She had a hard time getting them all together most of the time. Without a mom or dad of her own she never did get the intricacies of family life or the bonds that existed therein. That made her more excited to finally have a fully stocked and real family of her own to play with! Nopony was gonna be able to stop Pathfinder now! She was gathering the knowledge of all the happy family fun and soon she would be the best daughter in law of all time.

Made her wonder if she was going to have to deal with Merlot as a member of her soon to be venerable family. That would be a mite awkward but a little fun if Snowmom and Merlot hitched too. Maybe they could double up on the wedding and make it even more of an event! Hmmm...nah. Snowy wouldn't like it. She deserved something more anyway. But watching Snowmom blush as she lied about her innermost feelings was so cute! Pathfinder didn't know what it felt like to lie about something so important to who you were but she was not all that jazzed to discover the difference between a sincere lie because she was a little uncomfortable with it. Oh well! One day she'd get over her hibbie jibbies and be all about that loving with Merlot. Eww, Merlot loving? Ewwww. How did he manage to romance up both Snowy and Snowmom? He didn't seem all that suave to her. Oh well. CEOs will CEO it.

“It's been awesomesauce talking to you soon to be mom-in-law, but I got whole reams of invites! Later I'm gonna sneak into some castles, invite some Princesses, maybe ask one of them to stay out of my dreams and stop warning me against disrupting the delicate balance of magic and the other clappy trappy. OH MY GOSH I'M SO EXCITED!” Pathfinder bellowed, hooves shaking and vibrating due to the reverberations of her voice. She promptly super hugged Snowmom, kneading her face with Pathfinder's and planting a strategic platonic kiss or six in the all over areas. “It was good to see you! I gotta scoot! I'll make sure to kiss Snowy for you! Adios! Oh, if I seee Merlot again I'll tell him you want to discuss business again. Ya know, gotta ship the mom too!” Pathfinder chortled as she flew away, cascading through a window in her reverie and shattering it. “Sorry!”

[Bellosh]

 

Rest assured, Dr. Merlot did not respect Pathfinder in any way whatsoever. Hearing what Snowfall had to say on that matter, the good stallion cringed subtly. If that Stallian mare had any sense in her, she’d be apologizing profusely for all the trouble and misery that her lover has inflicted on poor Merlot. Why in Tartarus should the gentlecolt bother to make the biggest thorn in his side happy, when that spoiled excuse for a tomb raider would never think of returning the favor?

 

Trying not to envision the horrifying scene of Pathfinder meeting Crystal Snowflake, Merlot glanced at the written invitation again. So far, he had been disinclined to acquiesce to Snowfall’s request. “I’m afraid that I have a scheduled engagement that I can’t get out of the day of your wedding,” the stallion lied with a deadpan expression, keeping his gaze towards Snowfall's letter; “So I regretfully won’t be able to attend.” Snowfall would have to try much harder to convince Merlot that attending the wedding will be worth his while.

[SteelEagle]

 

(Snowmom and Snowfall are still needed, but I wanna get others involved now too.)

Pathfinder loved all of her adventure buddies to some degrees. They all played an important part in the sensual fabric of her storytelling, a vital part of her story and an intriguing element to the catharsis that were her friendships. Without her buddies her story, and her life, would be incomplete solo work of a high caliber. Still super interesting and awesome because she was super interesting and awesome but nopony ever liked solo books as much s they liked those delicious team-ups. Any good adventure filly and reader of super hero comics knows that those are the super best types! Daring Do always had a trusty buddy along for the ride, so why shouldn't Pathfinder have the best collection of rogues, heroes, villain,s friends, and taggers along in all the world? The answer was that she DID and she was going to find one of her more favoritest of the bunch ad invite them to her awesome wedding!

Trixie the Sorceress Supreme as Pathfinder called her, even if she wasn't really supreme and was more like the Sorceress Flashy, was one of Pathfinder best adventure buddies. She was pretty quick witted and was swift on her hooves and with her horn, which was good because she sometimes lacked the adventuring sensibility needed to really excel. If you were after power and not the thrill of it all then you would get neither. That was the law of adventure! Oh well. Trixie was still a really cool unicorn and she had all sorts of tricks. Pathfinder totally wanted to have her for the wedding and maybe even perform at the after party- what was it called, a wedding reception? Pathfinder was pretty pleased she knew that! Imagine Trixie doing all sort of magic tricks. That'd be totally sweet. What was even sweeter was being able to finally find the elusive unicorn out in the western reaches of Equestria, not far from Griff-Griff land.

It wasn't easy, that was sure. She was lucky that Trixie's performances in Las Pegasus had gone up in flames and from there she had followed a trail. One pony told her she went one direction, then a pony at the new location would tell her to go someplace else. One after another they pushed her closer and closer until she started to go through ruins and mysterious regions of a forest. Eventually they started to thin out and the edge of a cliff presented itself, the tell-tale sign of her tent appearing close to it. Must be admiring the view, eh? Pathfinder wasn't sure if her coltfriend Doctor Whooves was there but if he was, even better. She'd invite him too! It'd be an invitapalooza! Pathfinder hovered over the tent and allowed it to be buffeted by her gentle current, examined it for a minute, and flung it open.
“Hey there!”

[brianblackberry]

Trixie wasn’t having the best of times lately.  In fact, it was probably the worst time she’d ever had since she was in Ponyville.  Well, the apple booth at Sweet Apple Acres wasn’t bad, but that rest of it was awful.  Well maybe not talking to Twilight after that whole alicorn amulet thing, but other than that… Awful!  In a way, though, Las Pegasus was worse, as she had an opportunity to return to her original dream of becoming a star performer, spreading joy and awe through her incredible magical talents, only to burn down a pretty expensive stage at a luxury casino; she still had no idea how she got out of that without spending the rest of her days in debt, and not a few in jail.  Maybe she was lucky?  Oh, who was she kidding, Trixie was the most unlucky pony around, if only others truly understood what she was trying to do!

 

So now she found herself in the wilderness of along the eastern edge of the Brambles, avoiding the main roads, just in case there was a warrant for her.  Slowly she was making her way to Beakbreak City to meet up with Whooves, whom she had no doubt would appear next to her when she least expected it thanks to that strange special talent of perfect timing he had, the weirdo!  Oh well, at least she could count on him to help with her other passion, finding tomes and artifacts to help her become a more powerful unicorn!  Although they hadn’t had much luck yet…

 

Trixie had returned to her tent with a small sack of berries floating behind her, the results of her nightly scrounge for dinner.  It wasn’t much, but the azure unicorn has become quite adept to living in the wild when she needed to.   Except this time she saw somepony’s flank sticking out of the opening to her tent!  Bandits!! Thieves!! HOW DARE THEY!!!

 

Trixie wasn’t going to wait for a confirmation or explanation, not with how her year had been going!  With a bright blue blast from her horn, a concussive sphere of energy hit to invader right in the tush and knock them forward into the tent.  With another fierce glow of her horn, Trixie lifted and turned the tent so it wrap around the pickpocket’s body, only allowing their head to stick out before tying it tight so they couldn’t escape!  “Who dares rob the precious belongings of the Great and Powerful Trixieeee?!  Explain yourself, hoodlum, and perhaps the Great and Powerful Trixie will be merciful!!”

 

When the offending pony’s head finally did pop up, Trixie suddenly found herself face to face with a familiar face, Pathfinder!  “Oh, It’s just you … Wait, what are you doing here anyway!?”

[SteelEagle]

 

Pathfinder was a little shocked when Trixie wasn't in the tent. She was always in tents it seemed, whether she was burning them down or sleeping adorably. Sometimes the tents were actually covered wagons and those blew up somehow, which was actually really cool. In any case, her mind raced at the possibilities. Maybe Trixie was caught by an owl bear on the prowl bearing down on foul air of intruders, slinking silently through the woods stealthily skulking her towards the sensual surprise prize of her daily activity. Alas, that was likely not the case. She was probably off picking up some berries to eat or practicing some tricks to entertain future guests. Well, that would be cool at least. It would lead directly into what she was here to ask and good fortune smiled upon her in that way. Maybe this would be even better now, that one session more of training would make it the most spectacular event in all of Equestria. Sweeeeeeeeeeeeet! Where was her coltfriend though? Pathfinder tucked upper half into the tent, looking for them in-

 

-Suddenly, her world was turned upside down and inside out as she magic missile'd into the tent proper before finding itself turning all over her, like it was trying to eat her. Oh no! Had she fallen for the oldest trick in the book, the good ol' fashioned pony-eating tent mimic?! Ah-ha, well, she'd been caight by one of these before and she knew what to do! She would wiggle and giggle and playfully use her tail to tickle its throat until it went all blargargahargh and she got out, just like last time! Haha, take that you stupid mimics! Nopony could stop Pathfinder from- arghughgh! It was pulled tighter around her and now Pathfinder could could see the lines of magic around it. Okay, not a mimic. Geez...that was a letdown! It was just a spell! Awww...sadface Pathfinder is sad. 

 

“Who dares rob the precious belongings of the Great and Powerful Trixieeee?!  Explain yourself, hoodlum, and perhaps the Great and Powerful Trixie will be merciful!!”

 

Oh, cool! It was Trixie! That was why the magical infusion into the tent felt familiar. And maybe why it wasn't as impenetrable as her friend thought. For all of her power, and Trixie did have some nice power to her, she was often just so slightly off base. This time she had the tent pulled very tightly around the midsection and up, but there was some room for her tail and lower half to move a bit. Pathfinder's tail slowly worked its way up the back towards her saddlebag, finding the resistance tighter and tighter. No doubt she would still get what she needed, even though Pathfinder was sure she wouldn't need it.

 

“Oh, It’s just you … Wait, what are you doing here anyway!?”

 

Sweet, Trixie remembers her! Everypony should remember Pathfinder but not enough really did, so this was a nice little boost in confidence. “Well, I can tell you after I'm on the ground, silly! I was looking for you though and I'm PRETTY PRETTY sure you'll be totally super stoked for what I have for you!”