Writing little introductions for some characters-

[Sky]

For a group of mages I'm working on. Sky Blue, the Cookiewitch is the first one, and she's one of my mains; A silly, more comedic character, who loves cookies, and weaponises them with magic and love. 

The group's roster is as follows-

Sky Blue, Cookiewitch

Lucille, Sandwitch

Frederick Van Ralimanderia The Second, The First, Steamage

Ozzie Luximbur, Rockmage

Scarflandiara, Scarfmage

And Candy Calliera, Socialwitch

 

And I'm putting together little introductions for each of them. For example, this is Sky's introduction to Lucille -

 

-

The town square was packed. In the middle of it, a blue mare, creating cookies from thin air, cookifying inanimate objects, much to the delight of children, and chagrin of adults. She was beloved in minutes, with her bright demeanour and endless supply of sugary baked treats.

However, an onlooker, cloaked in a beige robe, watched with malice in her eyes. She made her way through the crowd, parting them like a burning firesword through moist cookie-dough.

"Cookiewitch! Your fancy tricks will please them for now, yes. But I will be remembered far longer! My savoury magic beats your sweets on every level of the nutrition pyramid!" She roared. The blue mare turned, still smiling, juggling cookies made of baseballs. "Oh really? What about the small tippy top with all the sugar in it? HAH! BEAT YOU AT YOUR OWN GAME, VILLAIN!" She countered. Suddenly, the cloaked figure raised her hooves, and Sky found herself slammed between two massive pieces of bread.

"Oh really, Cookiewitch? I don't think so, for I..." She whipped off her cloak, showing her cream-coloured coat, and second cloak underneath it- this one with the hood down- patterned in lettuce-green, with a necklace of tomato-red rubies. "AM THE SANDWITCH!" She roared, sending everyone running, screaming.
 

Sky jabbed a hoof in the direction of the Sandwitch's secondary cloak, her deteur-cloak, if you will.

"Nice poncho, missy." She teased, with a little giggle.

"It'S NOT A PONCHO!" The sandwitch roared, with the furious, self-righteous anger of a person who has explained this far too many times.

"IT'S A CLOAK TO MAKE ME LOOK COOL!" She yelled, stamping a hoof as the large pieces of bread squeezed Sky, earning a wheeze and a weak wiggle from the blue mare.

"And it's so I still look cool when I throw the other one off." She said, turning to fish it off a lamppost.
"... Excuse me." She mumbled, jumping up ineffectually to try and get her beige cloak off the top of it.
"Need some help?" Sky offered. Nodding, the sandwitch waved a hoof, freeing Sky, who wandered over to help her pull it down. With a faint ripping noise, it was freed, earning a groan from the as of yet unnamed mare.
"Damn it, I had this custom made!" She wiggled her ahooves.
"It's okay." Sky pat her back.
"Now, back to the... Thing?" She asked. The other mare nodded.
"Oh yeah, furious rage. Go on." She waved a hoof.

Sky smiled as she waddled back to where she'd stood, nodding to the large pieces of bread as she was smooshed between them again.
"Now, where was I... Ahem... Oh!" The sandwitch straightened up, wrapping her ripped cloak around herself.
"I... AM THE SANDWITCH!" She roared. Sky cleared her throat.
"Already did that bit." She said. The mare groaned, rubbing her temples.
"LINE!" She yelled, a bunch of bound paper dropping onto her head. Grumbling a thank-you, she quickly read through a few pages, before incinerating the lot.

"OKAY! MY NAME IS LUCILLE!" She shouted. "And I am here to destroy you, Cookiewitch!"
"Wait wait." Sky wiggled.
"Maybe we can be buddies!" She said, happily. Lucille blinked, tilting her head.
"... Yeah, sure. Want a sandwich?" She asked, freeing Sky again. Sky nodded.
"Sounds great!"

-

Just little tidbits like that - And I was wondering if I could get some critique? I'll post the others if anyone wants to see, but that's the basic format. Pony shows up, harasses Sky, silliness happens. And the only real comment I ever seem to get from friends is 'damn that's funny' or some sort of variation on that. So I decided to seek out some critique from other fellow writers!