NeilWacaster

"Really now. Your messenger and my monarch told me to disguise myself, and once inside, I came to you, with nothing to hide. Considering that I specifically came with a message of peace, rather than a message of war, it can hardly be treated as subversion." Still very wary from his earlier experience, Newsworthy jumped into the air out of the reach of the king and the few guards that remained. "And don't think that Equestrians would take kindly to their ambassador of peace being treated as a criminal. You may not want to press your luck against a race with two goddesses as rulers."

Newsworthy landed lightly at the castle gates, surprised to see that there were no soldiers in the courtyard. A tall human in a suit opened the door at his knock. "Yes? Oh ... it's you. The King has been expecting you." "Really? Excellent," Newsworthy said, smiling. Finally, something going right for a change. Wait ... Vividim is expecting me? I thought Partheus said ... can I even trust him anymore? "Right this way, master ...?" The butler paused. "Newsworthy, kind sir. And thank you." Everything was oversized, like he was in a palace made for trolls. Upon entering the guilded doors of the throne room, Newsworthy beheld a opulently dressed human sitting on a large throne. The room reminded him of the throne room in Equestria, but it was a darker, mustier version of it, like the alternate reality of a bad dream. "Well, that was quick," the king said, sounding a little surprised. "Welcome to Hominopolis, pony." "Thank you, sire. My name is Newsworthy," he said, bowing. "And what brings you to our fair country? Sightseeing is left for the untrained and unknowing. You are neither, as I hear." His chest swelled with pride. "Why yes, King Vividim. I am sent from Princess Celestia herself to offer a message of peace and friendship between our nations. She wishes to open trade routes with you, to start a new renaissance by exchanging knowledge and goods. Let us both work together to build a new, greater Equestria and Hominopolis." ((I intentionally spoke little for Vividim because I don't know him and his motivations as well as you. So, feel free to speak for him now ))

Newsworthy felt like he had been run through a ringer and hung out to dry. He did feel cleaner, but no cleaner than he did after his usual morning bath. And having a human bathe him was ... disturbing. "All right, now, you blue ... bird ... horse ... thing. Time to take you to see the stable master. Hopefully he'll know what to do with you." This was bad. Last thing he needed was to be seen by another one of these humans who worked in the stables. At first the pony pretended to be in submission, but as soon as the human unlocked the rope from the post, Newsworthy jerked his head sharply. Taking him off guard, he jumped into the air before the human could grab back onto the rope. "Get back here you!" The human flailed, trying to grab Newsworthy as he climbed quickly into the air. "Not likely. Your king will hear of your abuse of the ponies of this land, and you shall receive your just punishment!" Newsworthy cried, accelerating into the air. He zoomed upward and looked quickly about him. Seeing the castle a few city blocks away, he dove toward it. This has gone far enough. I am clearly superior to these humans in terms of intelligence and morals, if not strength. I am an emissary of Princess Celestia, and expect to be treated as such. King Vividim, it's time for you to meet an Equestrian.

"Now, now, Ungula, jus' calm down girl. Ya don't want me to hafta use the whip again, do ya?" the stable hand threatened as Newsworthy struggled. With horror, the pony saw that his head was tied by a rope to a large wooden stake. I have to get this stupid leather thing off my head if I even want to think about running away. What would possess a human to invent such a constricting apparatus? And whatever a whip is, it can't be good ... The human began to drag Newsworthy closer to the basin. He tried planting his hooves, but the rod in his mouth cut painfully into his gums. So that's what this is. A torture device used to ensure submission. There must be some other way to stop him ... He was right next to the basin now, the human trying to force him to step into it. "Ungula, I swear to Torbolt, if ya don't stop fighting, yer gonna wish ya were dead! Now GET IN THE TUB!" Newsworthy snorted angrily and bucked at the human, barely missing his face. Suddenly, he felt a sharp, searing pain in a sharp line across his flank. "I told ya, it's my way, or the whip, and then my way. But ya dumb brutes don't know anything but pain. A few lashes will teach you, you stupid animal." His eyes filled with hot tears as the human hit him again. I never should have come here. But, it's certainly eye opening. No wonder the ponies here are mute and stupid. The humans treat them worse than we treat parasprites. Even though he knew that he would regret it, he stepped into the tub submissively, if only to stop the attacks. "There ya are, that's it. I knew ya would come around eventually." The human began to scrub Newsworthy down. Streaks of grey washed down his legs and colored the water. Rarity said this makeup would wash off with soap and water. Of course. Of course it does. At first, the human just looked at him curiously, apparently thinking that he was covered in more dust and grime than he thought. But, as he started to uncover blue fur, he became more and more confused. As he tugged at the invisible bandage, all the human could say was, "what the bloody hell? What the actual hell!?" Newsworthy just looked at him, pretending to be stupid. He became more and more agitated as he unveiled Newsworthy's cutie mark. "I knew that that Partheus feller was not to be trusted. What did he do you, missy?" Newsworthy had to resist the urge to facehoof, but again, was disturbed by the human's words. Perhaps Partheus was actually very cruel to animals while he was here in his home country. He seemed to have no qualms with killing creatures, much to Newsworthy's surprise. The stable hand squatted down to wash Newsworthy's belly, and immediately stood back up. "Alright. I knew something was wrong here, but it's worse than I thought. Whatever this ... thing ... is, it's not Ungula, that's for bloody sure. If you're a mare, you're the most male-looking mare I ever seen. The messenger was trying to trick us, fer some reason. And what the bloody blazes are those!?" He prodded at Newsworthy's wings with a disgusting fingernail. "Lemme finish cleaning you up, and then you're going to see the head of the stable. He'll know what to do with ya." During all of this, Newsworthy tried to think of a plan of escape. But how? I don't think I'm strong enough to break the thing on my head. I'll have to get this rope free, somehow. * * * Twilight skipped through the gate, very pleased with herself. True, she had had to resort to the "Want it, Need it" spell, but she had still gotten through, hadn't she? And now she was free to explore a strange new place. She was confused by the warm welcome that all the jesters and beggars seemed to give her. "Why hello, every ... um ... one. Thank you for being so kind to me! How generous you all are. Do you know where I can find a bookshop?"

Newsworthy gritted his teeth and grumbled to himself. He repressed the urge to vomit as Partheus stroked his mane and spoke to him like he was stupid as a rock. As much as he wanted to call out and stop him, he didn't want the other human to hear. Mark my words, you hairless ape. You will regret this. If looks could kill, Partheus would have dropped dead as he left the stables. There was some sweet-smelling feed nearby, and, having nothing much else to do, Newsworthy consumed it with some chagrin. Eating like a dumb farm animal. This is the height of humiliation. I was under the impression I would be doing interviews! Exploring! Building trade relations! But no. Humph ... as the first emissary from Equestria to this land, one would think that the king would desire my presence. Perhaps later. He sighed deeply, and checked to make sure nopony ... er ... no human was around. Satisfied that this was the case, he retrieved a scroll and quill from his saddlebag and began to busily write his first editorial about this adventure. Needless to say, it would be less than stellar. But, he had promised Celestia to give her and the public a true, factual account. I sit in a cage, like a slave, writing to you in secret. These humans treat their equines like pigs, allowing them to wallow in their own filth and misery. He shuffled his hooves in disgust, noting that his cell needed a good cleaning. In stifling stalls barely large enough to turn around in, these ponies languish. No sun, no freedom, no joy. The ... A human walked into the stables, whistling a mournful tune. Newsworthy quickly stashed his scroll and hid the saddlebags under a pile of hay. "Alright, ye disgusting workhorses! Which one o' ye be that stupid mare what just got in? I'm to fix 'er up and make 'er fit for the messenger to use again. No doubt 'e ran 'er ragged as usual and she's thrown a shoe or whatnot." Newsworthy cringed. Is Partheus really that hard on poor Ditzy Doo? I thought he said he took good care of her ... and what is he going to do to me? Surely he won't mistake me for a mare ... he can't be that stupid. The human stopped before Newsworthy's stall and squinted at the sign above. "Oh, Ungula, that's it. Such a blasted funny name, but I remember now. Well, it's standard procedure for you, old girl. Though I'd rather take a stout stick to ya, for what you've been bloody acting up again. Never could do anything right." Newsworthy's first instinct was to lash out, but thought better of it. This would be a chance to get outside of the stable, and perhaps he might even be able to study the humans a little more. As long as the abuse was only verbal, he would take it like a stallion. Besides, it would make his article all the juicier. Anything more than words, though, and all bets were off. The stable hand wrapped Newsworthy's head in a leather contraption and forced a disgusting metal rod into his mouth. It tasted like it hadn't been washed in weeks. The human led him forcefully outside, into the blinding sunlight. "Come on, Ungula," the human said, mockingly. "Just a little farther, now. Try to walk in a straight line, if you can." They came upon a large basin filled with water, and a bucket of dirty suds. The human retrieved a filthy sponge and advanced menacingly. "Now, let's get you cleaned up." No! Newsworthy thought frantically, that's the only thing that could break my disguise ... not ... a ... BATH! * * * Meanwhile, Twilight Sparkle lingered outside the city gates, trying to think of a way to get inside. Considering what she had overheard, going in in pony form would not work at all. She had already transformed into human form using a modified version of her conversion spell. After observing a few of the human females, she felt that her estimate of the human anatomy was probably closer now. After much deliberation, she decided to change her hair color and style as well. It would be a dead giveaway should Newsworthy or Partheus happen to see her. Now, the real question was how to get inside. It seemed difficult for anyone who wasn't on official business. However, she noticed one female dressed in particularly revealing clothing get in merely by sweet talking the guards. Her analytical mind churned away at this. Surely it can't be that hard. Just say some things that the humans would find ... attractive. What does Partheus find attractive? After planning out her approach carefully, she sauntered up to the guards. "Hello, gentlemen," she said, trying to give her voice a breathy, cultured tone, similar to Rarity's accent. "Would you be so kind as to let a lady through your gate? I believe that you'll find that it will pay off handsomely in the long run ... provided you take into account both benefits and costs. I've some lovely new socks you might like to see me in ..."

Finally able to talk freely, Newsworthy exploded. "Put down!? PUT DOWN!?! Correct me if I'm wrong, but doesn't that mean euthanasia? Killing wild animals for food I might be able to understand, but just just killing animals you don't want anymore? And now you want me to sit here like a caged rat!? Really. REALLY. I used to have some respect for your kind. Key words being used to ..."

"No! I may be a pony, but I am NOT your horse," Newsworthy whispered shrilly. "If you think I'm going to let you just traipse around with you on my back, you've got another thing coming!" Just as Partheus was about to make a reply, an elderly woman pointed at him and warbled, "Excuse me, sir, but are you talking to your horse?"

"What!?" Newsworthy hissed. "No way. That's too weird. Not unless you're OK with me resting my aching hooves by riding on YOUR back. Really, the nerve."

Newsworthy gave the feed a few tentative sniffs before eating. It smelled and tasted completely safe, so he cleaned his bowl. They quickly broke camp and headed out, and walking briskly toward their destination. Once they had traveled an hour or two, they began to pass human travelers on the road. Most looked sullen, weary of life. Newsworthy felt sorry for them, actually. After a particularly distraught looking family passed them, Newsworthy whispered, "Why do your kind look so sad all the time? If a pony was that depressed, they would be sent to a counselor immediately by their friends or the state."

Newsworthy glided back down, his wings feeling a little better after their stretch. "Where in Equestria did you get that? Oh ... Celestia sent it, probably. I wouldn't be surprised if she had Twilight or somepony locate us with a scrying spell and send us some food. But, seems a bit of an overkill when she could have just given it to us before we left. Odd ..."

Newsworthy groaned. "Fine." He hopped out the hammock and stretched his legs like a drowsy cat. He unwrapped his wings and gave them a quick preening. "Ugh. While you gather breakfast I have to take a quick fly. And don't try to stop me. A pegasus' home is the sky, and he gets homesick rather quickly." He leapt into the air, climbing quickly to the treetops and circling lazily.

"I won't be able to sleep for a while. You go on to sleep, I'll just read for a bit." For a few hours, Newsworthy read quietly by the fire. Eventually, he couldn't keep his eyes open. Curling up into a little ball, he slipped into an uneasy slumber.