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Fawkes

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Posts posted by Fawkes

  1. A Particularly Peculiar Prologue from a Perplexingly Preposterous Pony

    in Introductions

    Posted

    Gooooood evening, Fillies and Gentlecolts!! Or perhaps good morning or good afternoon or good night or good gravy. Pick your preference, depending upon the state of the celestial orbs at the time of your reading of this monotonous mockery of a mission statement. Except good gravy. Good gravy is an exceedingly rare delicacy which I will greedily keep all for myself~

    I have come to the climactic conclusion that it is high time for me to give up my nefarious, lurking ways and make a proper introduction and debut onto Canterlot's royal stage. So without further ado...

    I am Nightfall Shimmer! Though I have had many a moniker from throughout my travels on the interwebs. In different circles I am known as BlackFox or BlackFawkes. In circles entirely separate from THOSE circles, I'm known simply as Fawkes. In old, forgotten circles I was known as Robert Catesby. Keeping track of all these endlessly circling circles though is terribly tiring, so these days I simply go by Fawkes or, my newly concocted pony alter-ego, Nightfall Shimmer~

    Like many souls, I was introduced to the fandom as its endless wave of memes, artwork, and fictions exploded outwards across the interwebs and the world, as it continues to do today. One day, adorable pony memes on imageboard. The next, I'm watching Pinkie giggle at the ghosties. The day after that, I'm Rainbow Dash in a MAGIC FRIENDSHIP PONIES group on Facebook, telling my mother she needs to be 20% cooler. Ponies are a plague which will cleanse the world of hatred with love and tolerance.

    So of course, being a pony, I've gotta drop where mah loyalties lie:

    BEST CMC is Scootaloo

    BEST BG Pony is Derpy Hooves (duuuuh! Herp derp!) ...Vinyl is a close 2nd.

    BEST Mane 6 is Pinkie Pie

    AND DISQORD IS BEST PONY OVERALL

    It's all legit. Don't try to deny it. These are unwritten truths grounded in deep Equestrian law. Ask Celestia~

    Moving on to some hard facts, I'm a kid in a 20 year old male's body. Toys R' Us is one of my favoritest places in the world. I'm from New Jersey but I'm currently going to college at U of L in Louisville, Kentucky, where it is painfully devoid of ponies... but... not REAL ponies. It's Kentucky after all. Horse capital of the world. So perhaps I should say devoid of bronies but full of ponies.

    I'm a writer who hates to write. I fill my time creating vast, endless worlds, bound by laws of vast complexity which I will most likely never constrain to a story. I love writing up my interpretations of pony mythos, being a huge fan of mythology, fantasy, and science-fiction. I'm currently working on an absolutely terrible My Little Pony fan-fiction, dealing with my mythos. It's actually not half bad but I'm still gonna tell ya it's terrible so that no pony has high expectations of it. So it's terrible. Trust me.

    I'm a gamer who rarely plays games these days. Console gamer for life with the 360 being epic winz. Currently I'm gnawing my way through the Gears of War mythos, game by game and book by book. After that, Skyrim will consume my life for days and weeks and months on end. There is a slight chance that I may die from lack of eating during that time. However, Halo is and always will be my first and foremost home realm of gaming. Ask me anything (ANYTHING!) about the Haloverse and I'll give you an answer or a credible theory in 10 seconds flat. I ain't got a bad trigger finger either.

    I haven't role-played since back when ponies respected Princess Luna. Thus my RP skills are sadly quite rusty. I used to love it when I would RP back in the day. I'm thinking about making an attempt at getting back into it though and who better with than a bunch of ponies, amirite? However, even back in the day, my roleplay skills were about as terrible as my horrendous writing. Don't expect much from them. They're terrible. Trust me.

    I have a strong policy of universal acceptance, regardless of race, gender, sexual orientation, shape, size, tail length, color, height, religion, species, or blasphemous beliefs on who best pony is. One type of person I cannot stand though are sociopaths. I have no patience for them. None. I have no love nor tolerance for them either. Trolls however, I dearly love, being that counter-trolling is one of my favoritest pastimes~

    Like I said, I have the bad tendency of lurking in the shadows when I don't have much to contribute. So most often you'll probably find me just quietly watching the shenanigans unfold in IRC. I'm extremely friendly though. So just throw an apple at me to get me talking. I love meeting new people, especially bronies who I don't know nearly enough of... none, really. That's a major reason why I'm here. I only have one friend who likes MLP... and he never watches it with me ;_;

    I also have a tendency toward immaturity and pure, unadulterated, Pinkie Pie randomness. However, get me talking about a subject which I have an interest in and I'll delve to the very deepest depths on the topic. I'm open minded and love discussing ideas and concepts which are foreign to me.

    I like cuddling and hugs :3

    I spend my time day dreaming about perplexingly paradoxical predicaments while analyzing the shapes of shady looking clouds in the sky. I dance in thunderstorms and challenge tornadoes to staring contests. At any one point in time I will always be caught between doing EVERYTHING and doing ANYTHING.

    I'm a recovering romantic with an alleged God-complex, constantly chasing after the ugly truth while inadvertently making numerous pit stops in Life's truck stops for cheap, overpriced souvenirs. Half the time I'm a people pleaser and the other half I pretend I'm not listening so I don't have to please any peoples. In the past I've had a tendency toward paranoia which is seeming... less and less necessary in the pony fandom. Innocence is a refreshing turn of page on the internet.

    I've been told that I'm bat**** insane and I don't deny it. I'm crazier than a wild Dragonequus but 10x more Pinkie Pie. I drink straight vinegar to quench my thirst and I punch trees to make sure they aren't ponies in disguise. These aren't wild fabrications but true stories. I've waltzed through Strawberry Fields and I've eaten oysters with The Walrus and the Carpenter (goo goo g'joob). These aren't true stories but wild fabrications. I have deep, philosophical conversations with myself which usually result in a fist-fight with myself over the moral conundrums which arise. I'm 20% cooler than a rabid manticore on a flutterage spree. I've got griffin blood and Celestia DNA. WHINNING :scream:

    Come at me, Brony. I will love and tolerate your cutie mark off~ <3

    Oh, and did I happen to mention that I have been graciously gifted with the ability to divine the future? True story, my little ponies. I have Seer blood too. Do allow me to demonstrate.

    Alright, so, lessee here... I see... I see something... I think it's... yes... monotony... with a good amount of... friendly hospitality... and... AND... COPYPASTA. Allow me to scramble up that dreadfully boring future just a tad >:3

    First and foremost, to the lovely and endlessly dramaturgical Miss Tales:

    Well now, if my memory isn't failing me terribly (which there is a very good chance that it is), I first heard Canterlot mentioned... in the chat room on BronyState during the live stream of Season 2, Episode 1. Unfortunately, the vast, overwhelming awesomeness of DisQord's introduction ended up filling my waking hours with daydreams of his sexy, chocolatey voice for days on end, thus delaying my visit until just recently. Better late than never~

    And being that I answered this question, which you never asked me in the first place but in all likelihood were going to ask, I offer my own question of curiosity: How'd you come up with your name? The more extended 'MyLittlePonyTales' version rather than the much shorter 'Tales' variant. Was it inspired by the MLP fanfics you write? :3

    As well, I will CERTAINLY be sure to bring any gripes, grouses, grumbles or guffs I may have to the attention of one of the wonderful benefactors of the royal city, such as yourself, Madame Tales.

    Oh and the rules have been retained, 3 posts are in postproduction, and the IRC is where you can most often find me~ ;3

    My next divination takes me to Canterlot's dearest, deer Mister Skye:

    My most hospitable cervine, my saddlebags are already quite near brimming thanks to your Rare generosity. I'm quite sure I will enjoy my time here with these innately insane ponies (and other critters) very, very much~

    As for real estate, I'm still scoping out the dizzying amount of different niches you have here in Canterlot. Perhaps I'll drop a couple of my terrifically terrible tales into the royal libraries or attempt to give my RP skills a hearty spit shine. As for music, I've been told my inebriated Giggle at the Ghosties rendition is simply... GHASTLY.

    Oh and we seem to come from somewhat familiar backgrounds. You wouldn'ta happened to have had a fursona, wouldya? I dabbled in a couple of forums and chats as a black and gray furred, male Renamon ;3 Hence, BlackFox. Although truly, the reproduction rate of drama llamas is entirely out of control in that kingdom. Tis a shame.

    Following that, a prophecy of the artistic astronomer, Mister BrianBlackberry:

    I am equally ecstatic for finding such a fantastically well maintained corner of the interwebs. Hum. Though that makes me ponder... if every forum or community is a corner of the internet... what must a room with that many hundreds and thousands of corners look like? Curious...

    But the vastness of Canterlot's vast corner is indeed quite vast. I look forward to exploring it more in the weeks to come~

    And Astronomy! Are you into like... the science of astronomy or like, stargazing? Cuz I'm currently taking a introductory college class on astronomy and it is kicking my flank. ESPECIALLY all those... luminescence of suns formulas, and gravitational pull of celestial bodies formulas, AND IF TWO SUNS CRASH INTO EACH OTHER HOW MUCH WILL EACH SUN PAY IN DAMAGES FORMULAS.

    Aside for the all the physics and formulas though, I think its a WONDERFUL science~

    Finally, to Sir Philip the Augmenter of Chronologies, Continuances, and Clocks:

    Thank you and I'm sure I will :3

    Theeere we are. Now we can avoid that silly ol' copypasta. I like to make my staff (and time wizards) work a li'l ;3

    All in all though, that's me in a nutshell. Not... not LITERALLY in a nutshell of course. I mean... I'd LIKE to be in a nutshell... I'm just not. But do pardon moi, I babel. As well, I do apologize for the wall of text. You'll find that that's also one of my favorite pastimes. I figured not enough ponies were doing themselves justice with their intros, so I hadta add a li'l flair. If you wanna know me, here I am, out in the open. If you wanna jus skim through all that and sink your teeth into jus the juicy bits, that works too. I'm sure you'll all get to know me around the forum and chat anyways.

    Welp, I reckon it's about time I cap off this monster of an overture. I can't wait to really get into some of the events here and I really look forward to meeting all the awesome ponies that call Canterlot home. So here's to many, many new friendships, adventures, shenanigans, and ponies!

    ~Nightfall Shimmer~

    (Erm... wow... that looks WAY longer now that I'm looking at it in preview mode. Maybe a li'l overboard. Oh well. SORRY AGAIN EVERYPONY! :sad: )

  8. Which Mane 6 pony is fastest?

    in Pony Chatter

    Posted

    I agree with DaBatGuy for the most part.

    Canonically, AJ is definitely the fastest runner. Pretty much everypony in Ponyville participated in the Running of the Leaves and she was up front in the lead the whole time except for when she was getting tripped up from her rivalry with Dash.

    No one ever mentions Pinkie Pie as being a super fast runner in Ponyville, like they do for Dash and her flying skills. So I'd just chalk Pinkie's hyper speed up to her non-canon reality bending masterH@x.

    Fastest flyer is undoubtedly Dash. The Sonic Rainboom is legendary. As in no Pegasus in recent history has been recorded being fast enough to cause one. And as evidenced by Dash's race to defend filly Fluttershy and the Young Flyer's Competition, Pegasus seem to test their flying skills all the time. Dash is the fastest Pegasus of the current generation. Sure, Fluttershy had to have been going pretty fast to catch up with Dashie, and that's probably the very fastest she's capable of (being that she was so very motivated), but it still doesn't compare to Dash at her fastest.

    Without the balloon? Motivated Fluttershy could probably give Dash a run for her money on an average day. But motivated Dash vs. motivated Fluttershy? Sonic Rainboom all the way.

    As for fastest overall, I would say that depends on what definition of speed we're talking about. If it's simply getting from point A to point B in the shortest time, I would say Twilight with her teleportation. If we're talking locomotive travel, Dashie would be fastest.

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