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Fawkes

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Posts posted by Fawkes

  3. Last post wins

    in Last Post Wins (formerly Spam Stables)

    Posted

    49 minutes ago, Penumbra said:


    What are you getting done? 

    Here's a tip, unless you're really tolerant to pain, don't get an industrial as your first one.
    Or do. I'm not your mother. 

     

    Penby's right yo.

    You prolly wanna start with something a little on the softer side for your first time.

    Like a Jacob's Ladder for example!

    Trust me.

    Trust me, yo.

    Has Fawkesy ever led you wrong?~ :3

  6. Last post wins

    in Last Post Wins (formerly Spam Stables)

    Posted

    10 hours ago, PatchworkPsycho said:

    Detention?

    I have one of those during lunch tomorrow

    Cuz I forgot that I was supposed to have one that I accidentally skipped

    But it's only a lunch detention so yay

     

    Oooooooooooh!

    Are you a baaaaaad boooooooy, Patchy?

    Do you walk around school punching lockers, singing the Japanese intros to anime songs, and saying "HECK", while making all the girls swoon?

    What'd you dooooooo?

     

    10 hours ago, Cathalos said:

    speaking of which IM GETTING MY EARS PIERCED FRIDAY MAYBE ISNT THAT WEIRD I THINK ITS A PLOT FOR HER TO STAB ME IN THE FACE BUT WERE DOIN IT SHE SAYS

     

    IF I SENT YOU A PAIR OF GIANT EARRINGS WITH MY FACE ON THEM MAKING KISSY FACES, WOULD YOU PROMISE TO WEAR THEM ON EVERY DATE YOU EVER GO ON FROM NOW ON?

     

    17 minutes ago, MicroChip said:

    It has certainly picked up lately.

     

    *picks up Microchip!* :I

  8. Last post wins

    in Last Post Wins (formerly Spam Stables)

    Posted

    Well, you see, I have a writing style which has been hailed by some in the industry as REVOLUTIONARY and UTTERLY IRRESPONSIBLE and A TRAVESTY TO THE ART OF WRITING.

     

    What I do is, I set up two tvs side by side, right?

    On one, I put on a marathon of American/Latin-American day time soap operas cranked up to full volume.

    On the other, I put 24-hour live American news coverage cranked up to full volume.

    Then I plug my home entertainment system into my compy and set it up to read out random LPW posts in a Microsoft Sam voice set at 500% normal speed. Also set at full volume.

    Then I chug a handle of rum, scream, and start thrashing my fingers against my keyboard until sentences start forming.

    Eventually I black out and when I wake up there are entire short stories in front of me involving LPW and the gang doing all sooooorts of weEEEeeEEeird and WACKY stooooof bein' 4LL t3H r4Nd0mz!

     

    But yes.

    If you think you can keep up I'll go and pick up a bottle of Bacardi 151 RIGHT NOW and we'll get started on CHANGING THE WORLD! >:I

    • Like 1

  9. Last post wins

    in Last Post Wins (formerly Spam Stables)

    Posted

    "As the Trump Weather Dominator Tower collapsed around them in a cacophony of sound and light, and the airborne circus of Soviet-era dancing bears rained down around them, Rosewind's lips finally met Angie's, colliding in a kiss that could only be described as explosive, violent, abusive, ethically unsound, politically worrisome, and utterly pointless from a nihilistic point of view!" 

    ...

    *COUGH*

    So uhhh... hey guys, SURPRISE, I've started writing short stories about all of you... :I

    Don't worry tho, I ONLY ever portray you all in the BEST, MOST ACCURATE of lights.

    • Like 2

  11. Last post wins

    in Last Post Wins (formerly Spam Stables)

    Posted

     

    7 hours ago, NastyMann said:

    I'm superficial/a poseur in that music that isn't "English" lyrically is too big a barrier for me because I care less about the "'"'music'"'" part and more the words? Song? Structure? idk it's hard to word because it's like retarded to say "uhh c music doesn't MATTER in MUSIC" because it totally does. I just listen to stuff weirdly I guess? I dunno; I guess I see music more as an avenue through which you express something--like obviously you don't put the instrumentation/actual song itself on the backgrounder when you're cookin' up lyrics it's gotta be good but it's only as good as the aspect of life it expresses, and I'm an ethnocentric douchebag who can only "get" what's been expressed if it's english

     

    that's still a cool song though. The intro sounds like me in the shower

     

     

     

    Don't worry, I gotchu fam.

    Check these lyrics out yo.

    Universal. Timeless. Transcending all barriers of language and culture to tell the TRUE story of the struggle of the human spirit in a rapidly industrializing global sociopolitical economy.

     

     

    I have it on good authority that this was the song that both Gandhi AND Winston Churchill were blaring on their iPod Nanos while they were throwing down the smack against slave owners in the Australian South.

    • Like 1

  14. Last post wins

    in Last Post Wins (formerly Spam Stables)

    Posted

    3 hours ago, Davroth said:

    So is Fawkes going to stay this time or is he going to abandon his post again soon? I'm asking for a friend.

     

    Listen.

    Listen here, okay? 

    Yur friend?

    Whos yur friend, huh?

    I'll tell ya who yur friend is.

    Hes a nobody, dats who he is.

    Hes a nobody and you tell him if he questions me again dat I'm gonna brekahisfaec.

    You tell him dat, okay?

    Okay >:I

     

    But also, yes, I'd like to confirm that I am indeed back for the rest of the time.

    Please vote for me in the primaries.

    I have it on good knowledge that ROSIE will only be around until the end of time MINUS 5 minutes!

    And WHAT exactly will she be doing with those five minutes!?

    Memeing on 4chan, folks.

    Memeing on 4chan.

    I can't make this up, folks.

    SAD! >:[

     

    32 minutes ago, Cathalos said:

    I'm going to honor my legacy by not reading any of this but if someone wants to be my friend I can promise you lots of perks.
    1. I'm pretty much always online if you run out of people that are actually good
    2. I have no self respect so I'll make you feel good about yourself just by being around you
    3. I'm unreasonably sensitive so when our friendship inevitably falls apart in a fiery explosion, you can rest assured that it was my fault and you're alllllllll good. 

    4. I have $6.26 in steam money right now so I'll buy you a game if you talk to me. lilo and stitch maybe. 

    5. I have been known to help people with essays from proofreading to just ****in writing the big half of the essay so feel free to take advantage of me in almost any way. 
    6. No self respect like before but also I'm cute ;))))
    7. When I'm sleepy I'm cute sometimes according to some people who were probably lying. today the doorbell rang and I screamed at the top of my lungs instinctively
    8. I watched brokeback mountain and didn't get depressed about it for a WHOLE DAY. I think that makes me strong but my friend says it makes me straight. ):  
    9. One person out of all of my friends said I'm cool. On camera. (it was in snapchat so I don't have proof...)
    10. please

     

    I CAN PERSONALLY CONFIRM ALL OF THIS INFORMATION.

    1. You're already in my top 10 friendo list yo

    2. Every conversation I've ever had with you made me feel great

    3. I've known you for 3+ years and I still consider you a friend

    4. Yo don't tell anyone or anything but I'd totes give Stitch a li'l kiss or two on the lips cheek~

    5. YO LOOK AT THIS WALL OF TEXT AND TELL ME THIS GURL CAN'T WRITE
    6. You ARE really cute~ :'3

    7. I do not yet have experience with this scenario and thus can not speak about it with any accuracy. But I imagine it's super true

    8. GAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAY

    9. I can confirm this. Thala is vurry cool :3

    10. ...and thank you.

     

    59 minutes ago, Rosewind said:

     

    I thought you'd never ask. Pucker up!

     

    0fe5094a647891a9c3125510ea249e36.jpg

     

    By the by, how do you prefer to be addressed, Fawkes? 

     

    At last!

    The hand job my lips deserve!

    I thought I'd never find the "one" for me, but... I guess dreams DO come true~<3

    *smooches dem lips all day and night~* :'3

     

    ANNNNND... if you're being for serious, I prefer "it" and "they" and "thing".

    BUT if you're jus bein' a big ol' silly, I prefer "he/him" :3

  17. Last post wins

    in Last Post Wins (formerly Spam Stables)

    Posted

    5 minutes ago, Rosewind said:

    I am not responsible for any dirty calculators with cock buttons.

     

    Fawkes. I thought you were dead. Such a pleasure to have you back!

     

    *CRUNCHA BUNCHA MUNCHAS his way over to Rosie*

    *drapes his arms around her neck*

     

    I was dead.

    As cold as a corpse.

    As broken as my bones.

    As inanimate as a fan of MyLP.

     

    BUT A VISION CAME TO MY POOR BROKEN BODY

    A VISION OF UNSURPASSING BEAUTY AND INFINITE GRACE

    A VISION THAT SANG TO ME AND BREATHED LIFE BACK INTO MY SHATTERED FORM

     

    It was you, Rosie.

    It was a vision of you.

    Now give this sad sack of bones a kiss to anchor me to this plane of existence once and for all~

    *PUCKERS HIS LIPS AS THEY MAKE A BUNCH OF LOUD, WET SLURPING SOUNDS*

     

    Come on.

    Come on, do it.

    Do it.

    I'll call you lame if you don't :'I

     

  18. Last post wins

    in Last Post Wins (formerly Spam Stables)

    Posted

    ...

    ......

    .........are you Penumbra?

    Is this a Penumbra alt account?

    PENUMBRA, YOU'RE NOT ALLOWED TO HAVE TWO ACCOUNTS ON CANTERBUTTS, YOU'RE GONNA GET US BANNED AGAIN! >:I

     

    *rubs his floppy rubber-like hand against your cheek*

    *the hand falls off*

    *it continues to jiggle*

     

    This new face is nice though.

    I like this new face.

    Your old one was way too pretty and made me feel far too insuperior! >:I

     

     

  19. Last post wins

    in Last Post Wins (formerly Spam Stables)

    Posted

    17 minutes ago, Angie Cakes said:

    *walks over to the fawkesequus, hand raised*

     

    please sir, a high five if you will

     

    ..huh?

    OH.

    Pfffh, yeah sure I guess >:I

    *goes to give Angie a high five*

    *just ends up slapping his noodly paw against her hand*

    ..... :'I

     

    *COUGHS*

    *waddles his way over to Patchy*

     

    CRAAAACK KRAK CRAAAAACK CRUNCHA MUNCH

    KRAAAAKCY CRUNCH KrrrraaaaaaaaAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAACCCCCCCK

    *falls down*

    *crawls the last couple feet*

    *pulls himself up Patchy's body*

    Hello.

    Hello Patchy.

    I am Fawkes.

    That's my name. 

    Now tell me a secret about YOU :I

    *the sound of bones grinding together is deafeningly loud*

     

     

  20. Last post wins

    in Last Post Wins (formerly Spam Stables)

    Posted

    *from the top of the tallest tree in the wood he stands, like a greek god cut from flawless marble!*

    *his eyes gleam with an unquenchable fire and boundless determination!*

    *he gives a sly, knowing smile down to the plebeians below~*

     

    *suddenly he dives from his lofty perch!*

    *his arms spread out in front of him like a spear point!*

    *the wind whips around him in a violent torrent as he rapidly descends!*

    *the trumpets of creation begin to blare from the sky as a choir of cherubs begin to sing in unison, their medley transcending the bounds of time and space!*

    *he tenses his body, every muscle and fiber of his being ready to break into a perfectly executed roll-and-hop the moment he reaches the ground!*

    *his eyes narrow in concentration as the ground rises up to meet him!*

     

    *the wind catches him in just the wrong way*

    *his body tumbles end over end*

    *he slams into the ground legs first, a monumentally loud CRRRRAAAACCCCK echoing across the wood*

     

    ...

    ......

    ......... :'I

     

    *he stands up and brushes the dirt off himself nonchalantly*

    *he begins to waddle his way over to his dear old throne, upon two legs now filled almost entirely with bone shards*

     

    CRRACK

    CRACK CRAAAAK CRRRRRRRRAAAAAAAAAACK

    KRAAAK KRAK

    CCCCCRRRAaaaaAAAAAaaaAAACCCCCK

     

    *dons a pair of really slick sunglasses*

    *he goes to lean against his throne like a real cool dude would do with his arms crossed and everything*

    *the throne, upon contact, immediately bursts into splinters and debris, clearly rotted and riddled with termites*

    *he falls and breaks his wrist with another resounding CRACK*

    *his sunglasses shatter on the ground*

     

    .............. :''I

     

    *he stands and waddles over to the nearest sturdy looking tree*

    CRACK CRACK CRACK CRACK CRRRRAAaaaaaaaaAAAACK

    CRACK CRACK SNAP CRACK CRRRRAAAAAACK

     

    *leans against the tree*

    *dons his shattered sunglasses and crosses his arms*

    *his one paw bobs and sways in the wind like a limp noodle*

     

    *cough*

    *COUGH*

    ...hey.

    Wassup?

    How've you dweebs been? :I

     

  23. Last post wins

    in Last Post Wins (formerly Spam Stables)

    Posted

    6 minutes ago, CatCakey said:

     

     

    I ALSO TOOK A SCREENSHOT OF FAWKES' 666 MILESTONE

    666

     

    AHHHHHH you're so amazing for saving this screenshooooot! I was just lamenting the fact that I wasn't quick enough to snap a shot, but here it is, thank youuuu!~ :'D

     

    But yeah, Thala is bein' super honest. No one here WANTS ta see you upset! Buuuut at the same time... this here Last Post Wins thread is built upon a looooong legacy of teasing and playful bullying. All of us have gone through it at one point or another. And for that teasing to land on you basically just means that you're going through initiation into our little family. Unless you give up and let their teasing get to you, of course... ~ <:'3

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