BrainedBySaucepans

Out of interest, what's the average time it takes for an application to be approved?¹

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¹ Please don't think I'm being impatient. I understand that I've written a lot of stuff for this, and I'm prepared to wait longer as a result.² I ask merely out of idle curiosity.

² Plus, I'm not sure what the reaction will be to my spoiler tagging of such a significant amount of detail. I didn't see any other applications done like this, but I love RPing characters with hidden motivations and depth, and this seemed the best way to do it in a forum RP.

I'd rather not...1

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1 Wouldn't want to get blood all over your beautiful knife.

To be honest, nothing is coming to mind right now, other than the stuff I put in the footnotes.¹ It's been a while since I watched any Doctor Who.

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¹ You read the footnotes, right?

Philip K. Dick - A Scanner Darkly, Do Androids Dream of Electric Sheep, Valis, Ubik - So influential in the SF world, and with good reason.

Douglas Adams - The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy, Dirk Gently - Shouldn't need an introduction.

Tom Sharpe - Wilt, Porterhouse Blues - A true master of the farce, although he does come off as rather bigoted at points.

Terry Pratchett - Discworld - Once again, shouldn't need an introduction.

Dan Simmons - Hyperion - If you want a unique take on Hard SF, read Hyperion. Now.¹

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¹ I seriously cannot recommend this book too highly. It's a really thoughtful look at religion, poetry, art and what it means to be human, wrapped up in a Chaucerian framing device.

It just that he seems to go for style over substance.¹ Just my personal opinion.

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¹ I think he gets too much credit for his villain creation too. For example, while he was credited as writer for the episode that introduced the Angels, his main contribution to that episode was the overall story structure, and from what I gather, the Angels were added by another writer in the final stages of writing to provide a villain that wouldn't be too VFX intensive.

A bit mellow and formulaic for my tastes, and I don't see much connection between the lyrics and verse of the chorus. At the end of the day though, formulas become formulaic for a reason, they work. Loved the solo too, since it actually fits in with the rest of the song.¹

3/5

I haven't heard many MLP related songs that aren't from the series, so I'll have to throw in something completely different:²

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¹ Something a lot of guitarists don't seem to care about....

² Which gives me a chance to introduce others to my bizarre tastes.... In my opinion it's really unfair on Electric Six that they get dismissed as one³ hit wonders.

³ Or two.

@BrainedBySaucepans

Moffet. I mean, RTD was good at writing for the Doctor, but he never tried to make up his own enemies for the Doctor. The Daleks, the Cybermen, The Master, Darvos; they're great, but Steven Moffet has made equally great villians. The Weeping Angels, The Silence, and the Vashta Nerada. Which, and I mean no offence to the Daleks or the Cybermen, are much more frightening.

I agree that Moffat's a better writer, especially when it came to inventing new villains,¹ but I don't like how the show developed when he took the reins.²

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¹ Although I get the impression he didn't really understand what made his villains actually effective. Look at what he did with the angels when he took over. I've seen all the fan justifications out there, but at the end of the day, you shouldn't see the angels moving.

² Me and a friend actually bumped into him at a sci-fi convention.³ We were both rather drunk, so decided we'd take him aside and explain in detail everything we thought he was doing wrong. Ah, precious memories. I'll never forget the look on his face when I repeatedly told him "You know what your problem is? It's that you don't know what your problem is. Well me and Alan her can help you with that; you see we've worked out that you don't actually understand yourself, so everytime you try to work with yourself, you just balls everything up!"

³ It was a truly epic convention, I got free tickets because a friend won them in a competition, but found out at the last minute that she couldn't go. To make it up to her, I got George Takei to record a video message for her, saying how sorry he was she couldn't make it Then I went browsing the stalls, and had found a particularly interesting steampunk retailer when I looked up and realised that Terry Pratchett was standing right next to me. To cap it all off, Craig Charles was DJing at the evening get together, and the man has talent.⁴

⁴ He played a lot of funk music, which isn't normally my thing, but I got really into it, especially when he put on a funk cover of Killing in the Name of.

I hope you weren't sitting on the top deck.¹

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¹ Looking up the number of the bus,² it goes fairly near where I live. Mental note; avoid the number 24...

² I have way too much spare time.

Sorry, but due to planned engineering works on the Northern Line, the train scheduled to hit that small child has been cancelled.¹

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¹ In all seriousness, living in London is enough to destroy any positive feeling one may hold towards trains. There are ALWAYS planned engineering works taking place at the weekends. It's especially annoying when they claim that the engineering works were planned, and yet there was no sort of advance notice. I'm sure every Londoner has, at some point, felt that the fnords at TfL were deliberately changing the engineering schedule to screw with them specifically. Gah!

You haven't been assimilated yet? Only one response to that...

"We are the Herd.

Lower your inhibitions and surrender your sanity.

We will add your artistic and creative distinctiveness to our own.

Your fan-fiction will adapt to service us.

Resistance is futile."¹

Also, I see what you're doing there, coming here and using footnotes... I've got my eye on you.²

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¹ I know, it doesn't scan very well, and I could probably do better, but I can never pass up the chance to make a Star Trek reference...

² I AM THE KING OF FOOTNOTES! DO NOT TRESPASS IN MY DOMAIN!

If you're a Dr Who fan, I have a very revealing question to ask you; who is the better showrunner? RTD or the Moff?

Oh, and welcome to Canterlot! I shall have to check out your audio drama when I get the chance,¹ as I'm a big sucker for anything like that.²

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¹ It's been added to my list...

² I was brought up on BBC Radio 4, and mainly regard TV as a nuisance.³

³ Apart from MLP of course.

So, I've just finalised by RP application. I'd really appreciate it if as many people as possible could give me feedback. I've decided to go all out and flesh out Ashen Smirk a good deal, and I'm being quite ambitious with characterisation.

Please take a look if you get the chance:¹http://www.canterlot.com/topic/10903-professor-ashen-smirk-final/

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¹ It's also got an explanation of my cutie mark, if anyone's actually interested in that.

Roleplay Type: World of Equestria RP

Name: Professor Ashen “Footnote” Smirk

Sex: Male

Age: Stallion

Species: Earth Pony

Eye Colour: Grey-green

Coat Colour: Bluish grey

Mane/Tail/Markings Colour & Style: Ashen keeps his blond mane pretty short, and fashionably unkempt. His tail is the same colour, and while average length, is kept in a similar condition to his mane.

Physique: Ashen certainly enjoys a good meal, perhaps too much, and as such has a noticeable paunch around the belly. However, he does a fair bit of travelling, preferring to do so on his own four hooves, as it gives him a chance to think and enjoy nature. This has left his limbs pretty well developed, with evident (if not prominent) muscles.

Cutie Mark: A golden apple, not representing his appetite for pomaceous fruit (which is indeed prodigious) but instead appearing as an ancient symbol of knowledge and discovery. This represents his passion for truth and balance, and desire to encourage it in others.

Origin/Residence: Originally hailing from Hoofenheim, Ashen is currently based in Stalliongrad but travels frequently for research purposes.

Occupation: Academic

Motivation: Ashen is never happier than when he is debating with other ponies. The topic seems to matter little to him, as long as those conversing with him are willing to explore it to its fullest extent, and he loves nothing more than to turn a discussion on its head with a carefully chosen point. It is this passion for minutiae that lead him to his academic position, as it gives him unparalleled access to some of the most extensive libraries in Equestria.

Once again though, this is just the outer layer. Ashen’s inner motivations are a bit more complicated, and he no longer fully understands his purpose himself. As a colt, he came across some ancient manuscripts on the nature of chaos and reality. They stated that true chaos was not pure disorder, but rather a mixture of both order and disorder. As the manuscripts put it:

“Order and disorder are artificial concepts; reality is chaotic, and ponies look at it through a window, on which they draw grids (concepts). When a group of ponies with similar grids emerges, it is called a culture. Ponies label the bits that align with their grid ordered, and the bits that don’t are called disordered. Thinking that the order is true, and disorder is false, or somehow wrong, is as meaningless as thinking the opposite. If you change your way of thinking, what was ordered can become disordered. Reality is chaotic; truth (with a small t) and falsehood are subjective, but Truth (capital T) is entirely irrelevant to mental grids.”

This resonated particularly with Ashen, and he devoted himself to studying the ideas contained within the manuscripts, which were written by a group who regarded Discord as an avatar of Chaos, and the rightful ruler of Equestria. Ashen embraced this idea, and the other principles of espoused in the scrolls, believing that Equestrian society placed too much emphasis on order. He made it his mission to impishly encourage and foster disorder, and began to seek out a way to enable Discord’s return.

This was to prove unnecessary, as Discord was released without needing intervention, but Ashen’s jubilation quickly turned to despair. Whether imprisonment had driven him mad, or whether Discord had never truly represented the principles he believed in, Ashen was unsure, but it was clear that the creature unleashed had little in common with the philosophy Ashen had come to hold true. Once the Discord crisis was averted by the avatars of the elements of harmony, Ashen burned his life’s work, a book intended to spread his philosophy to all of Equestria, handed in his notice at the Canterlot faculty, and applied for a fellowship at the University of Stalliongrad. He felt that the cold weather and dour atmosphere fitted his mood.

Now, while he has regained some confidence in his original beliefs, Ashen is still trying to come to terms with the change in perspective brought by the crisis. He has resumed his subtle activities promoting disorder, but even he isn’t sure if he does this out of the genuine conviction and playfulness he felt before, or out of malice toward the society which bettered his fallen “avatar”.

Likes: Apples, his pipe, debating, walking, history, hot dog buns

Dislikes: Ponies “lacking in intellectual curiosity”, authority, manual labour

Virtues: Dedicated to truth, open minded, patient, enthusiastic

Flaws: Compulsive liar, overly proud of his intellect, can be very patronising to those he considers his intellectual inferiors, can seem hot-headed when involved in a discussion

Character Summary: Upon first meeting Ashen Smirk, the first thing most ponies notice is his constant grin. While this, coupled with his apparent light-hearted nature, generally make him pleasant company, ponies spending a long time in his presence generally start to feel mildly unsettled, perhaps due to the way it doesn’t quite extend to his eyes. It is his smile, along with his grey coat, which gave him his name. His parents claim that he was born grinning.

He did not have a particularly happy childhood, his parents were both practical Hoofenheim Earth Ponies, and his carefree approach was the cause of much friction between them. While he saw hours researching Equestria’s history and debating points of philosophy as time well spent, they thought of it as pointless daydreaming. This all came to a head one day, when they told the young colt that his flank would be bare for the rest of his life, and that he would never amount to anything. The ensuing blazing row ended when Ashen told them that they were “dumb animals, barely fit to pull a plough”, stormed off and boarded a train to Canterlot, the smile gone from his face. It would not return for many years.

Having nowhere to stay in Canterlot, he sought refuge in the environment he felt most at home; the library. He hid himself away deep in the archives, where even the librarians rarely ventured, and immersed himself in the ancient dusty tomes. As he read, he realised that many of the documents he was reading predated the founding of Canterlot, containing historical information that had been completely forgotten by most ponies. Completely absorbed in this research, he failed to realise that he’d been discovered until he was physically hauled away by Canterlot guards, and it was only when they dictated his description to a clerk that he realised he had gained his cutie mark; a symbol of a lost culture he had rediscovered, representing truth and discovery.

That was at least the explanation he gave to any pony curious enough to ask; he suspected that other ponies would not easily accept or understand the principles of the ancient philosophy he had come to embrace, so chose to keep it secret until he was sure he could adequately convey it's meaning to Equestria at large. This was the first time he actively lied about himself or his studies, but it quickly became a habit.

While staying at a hostel for troubled colts, he wrote up all he could remember from his studies of the ancient documents (but only the ones with nothing to do with Discord), and this caught the eye of the social worker assigned to his case, who sent it off to the historical department of Canterlot University. The essays he put together were regarded as impressive for a colt of his age, and they agreed that, when he was old enough, Ashen would be granted a scholarship.

While he was not the most intelligent pony on his course, Ashen was by far the most articulate and passionate, and this made him stand out amongst his peers. However, there was another factor which made him infamous, his fiery temper led to many arguments, both with fellow students and members of the faculty, and often on seemingly trivial topics. He was nearly kicked out on more than one occasion, but each time his excellent grades convinced the disciplinary board to let him stay. After all, he’d graduate eventually, and then he’d be some other pony’s problem.

Graduate he did, setting a new record for high marks in the process, but to the horror of the disciplinary board, he immediately re-enrolled on a post-grad philosophy course, funding his continued studies by publishing his historical research. To their relief, he spent his time as a postgraduate working in his apartment and in close discussion with his tutors, who by this point had grown used to his fiery temprement.

There were no objections when Ashens applied for a post on the faculty, but he proved to be a highly atypical professor. He despised the act of giving lectures, preferring to talk one-on-one with his brightest pupils. When he did give lectures, they were unusual to say the least, mainly consisting of diatribes directed towards any unfortunate student who didn’t meet his standards (and the occasional fellow lecturer). He became infamous in academic circles for his blazing rows with department heads over the best way of teaching. Eventually, the educational establishment decided that the best policy was an unofficial mutual non-interference pact. His position of lecturer became a strictly symbolic one; as long as he kept churning out papers and tutoring the occasional student who caught his eye, he was free to do as he pleased.

Then came the incident with Discord. His colleagues speculate that seeing first-hand the chaos caused by a lack of harmony shook him up, but whatever the reason, in the aftermath his personality seemed to change overnight. Where once he was short-tempered, he gained great reserves of patience. He no longer seemed angry with the world, and the formerly ever-present ear-to-ear grin became a permanent feature once more. All agreed that he looked like he was more content than he had ever been before.

In fact, his years of studying and his tenure at Canterlot University had been the happiest of his life, and he viewed his infamous quarrels as some of the most intense, truthful and refreshing discussions he’d ever had. Now his philosophy was in tatters, and he had personally destroyed all copies of the book he’d spent most of his life on. The uncertainty brought by Discord’s return had robbed him of his confidence, and made him fear people’s reaction to his beliefs. As a consequence, he decided to restrain himself, simply grinning wider when before he would have launched into passionate oratory.

None of them really understood his decision to leave Canterlot for a position at Stalliongrad, but he was adamant. He had discovered all he could from the Canterlot records, and was sure that yet undisturbed information from the early years of Equestria would be found in the archives of the University on the bank of the Stadia.

Depends entirely on what it is.¹ Give me details man!²

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¹ Actually, I'm pretty much guaranteed to say yes; I've been out of practice for way too long, and relish any chance to get stuck in to any sort of artistic endeavour.

² Also, please let me know what you would like tweaked. May as well get it done while the project is still fresh in my mind.

If this does end up with a server, please count me in.¹

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¹ I already play on an MLP themed server, but it isn't really an RP server.

Right, got it done! I decided on a nice dynamic pose,¹ so it took me a lot longer than I expected, but I'm personally really pleased with the result.²

Of course, it's your character, so ultimately my opinion doesn't count. Let me know what you think, and if you want any changes made.⁴

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¹ Which has the added advantage of keeping the cutie mark hidden, since I couldn't think of anything appropriate. Sorry

² Apart from the background. I tried using a Korean flag, but the colours clashed really horribly with Master Mustang.3

³ Also, I could not work out what to do with the tail...

⁴ Seriously, don't hesitate to say if you want changes. I deliberately kept all the individual elements separate so I could change things round with minimum hassle. I may even try animating it at some point, if you have no objection to that.

May as well mention my Livestream here; I've decided I'm going to do some drawing tonight, and I'm up for taking requests. Feel free to drop in and say hi on Mumble too.¹ Details here: http://www.canterlot...0-british-time/

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¹ I get very lonely :'(

I've decided I'm going to livestream as I draw up your pic, then see if anyone else has any requests. Feel free to drop in.¹ Details here: http://www.canterlot.com/topic/10888-livestream-art-requests-tonight-2100-british-time/

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¹ You'd probably be the only one...

Greetings again, Master Mustang. Love the application, but there's a couple of small points I think need revising before you submit it for evaluations.¹

First off, you may be asked to remove the references to your OC's age in years. From what I gather, since there hasn't been any official word on how fast ponies age, the admins have asked people to keep it vague.²

Secondly, you may have to change your cutie mark; there's a general rule saying all text, even in images, has to be in English. I believe this is to stop people slipping foreign obscenities under the radar.³

Other than that, looks pretty good to me. Good luck!

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1 Not that I have any relevant experience, this is all stuff I've gathered from skimming the sticky posts at the top of this sub-forum.

2 For example, instead of teenager, use colt.

3 I know this through personal experience; my avatar was taken down for having ancient Greek text.

As far as footnotes go, I'm trying to limit myself at the moment.¹ Don't want to wear out the novelty.²

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¹ Yes... that's it my pretties. I'm keeping you hidden for now, but soon... soon I shall unleash you. First on Canterlot, then the other forums, until finally you shall overflow the bounds of the spoiler tag and engulf the world! Let wild descriptions roam the streets of the major cities! Unpunctuated run-on sentences shall spread through the wilderness! And the oceans shall OVERFLOW! BOILING OVER AS MY UNADULTERATED PROSE SMOTHERS THE LAST LIVING CREATURES BENEATH A SANS-SERIF FONT! THEN THE MOON SHALL BE PULLED DOWN FROM THE HEAVENS!!! DRAWN IN BY THE GRAVITY OF WHAT I HAVE TO SAY!!! AND WE SHALL COLONISE THE MOON!!!!! WITH PREPOSITIONS!

Ahem

² Or anyone's patience...

In regards to improving your artwork, I highly recommend experimenting with vectors.¹ You don't need a tablet for them,² and there's some good free software out there.³ As far as British TV goes, you've got a good grounding there, but a lot of the best stuff get's hidden from visitors.⁴

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¹ Advice I wish someone had given me years ago. I've spent ages avoiding them, and have only recently discovered how useful they are.

² In my opinion, using a mouse is actually better.

³ I recommend googling Inkscape.

⁴ In my opinion at least, but then again, my tastes are bizarre. If you value your sanity, I suggest you don't ask me for recommendations...

Not a bad first post... Welcome to Canterlot!¹

I'm a big fan of that art style myself, but absolutely useless when it comes to trying to emulate it...

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¹ Make sure you drop by the introduction board and start a thread, it's a great way to meet everyone. http://www.canterlot.com/forum/211-introductions/

I highly enjoy England and Germany, personally.

All I can say to that is you must have stayed indoors...¹

I like the avatar by the way; did you draw it yourself?

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¹ Just realised what a stereotypical Brit I seem, moaning about the weather. Time to burn my tea and learn a new language.

Welcome to Canterlot!1 I'm glad to be the first fellow Brit to welcome you.

As it happens, I have a friend in Scarborough, and he was in fact the chap who introduced me to MLP. Small world!

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1 Wait, you got here before me. Am I supposed to say that? Am I even allowed to?!? Ah who cares. Welcome!

Welcome to Canterlot. I personally reckon you'll be a welcome addition to the community here.

I'd also like to say that even if we're not from the same country,¹ I have a huge amount of respect for anyone with the guts to step forward and serve in the armed forces. Massive props to you, sir!

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¹ I'm a Brit myself, but don't hold it against me.