Creature Shadow Fang [Ready]

[Smartbrony]

Roleplay Type: World of Equestria

Name: Shadow Fang

Sex: Female

Age: Young Adult

Species: Diamond Dog

Eye color: Dark purple.

Coat: Smooth, shiny, black hair covers her body. She has a long snout, and short, pointy ears. She wears a fang shaped piece of obsidian around her neck, hung by a thin strip of black leather.

Mane/Tail: N/A

Physique: She stands a little shorter than a full grown pony.

Residence: She lives in the southern Diamond Dog settlement in the heartland of Equestria.

Occupation: Gatherer and scout/spy.

Cutie Mark: N/A

History: Shadow Fang had grown up in the background. No one had ever paid her much mind, and she was able to get away with a lot by pouting and showing her puppy dog eyes. She learned that she could earn more by getting others to do something for her, and she found that if she said just the right things she could get even the biggest bullies on her side. Her keen eyes could help her figure out others easily, but they are also adept at finding various foods in the Everfree. She was swifter than most of the other gatherers, usually getting back to camp before everyone else. Her skills were good enough for her to be accepted into the scout squad, but she's still trying to work her way up the pack ranks the easy way. Lies and information, that's all it takes.

Character Summary: Shadow Fang always appears friendly at first, but you can be sure she's thinking of some way she can use you. Manipulative and a clever speaker, she can almost always get what she wants, whether that be an item, or a favor. Even her collared stone she got from someone else. However, she finds her life missing something (like some friends. *hint hint*), but she has little time to dwell on such thoughts, as she's always trying to learn something about someone, and figure out how to use that to her advantage. She prefers to use non-violent methods to reach her goals. She believes that no one can be trusted, because how can she tell if she meets someone just like her. If she's ever going to be a top dog in the pack, she has to be cunning. If she has to let a few dogs fall so that she may climb, why should she care? She shouldn't.............right? But she does. Deep down, she truly does care about others, she just can't see it because she's never trusted anyone enough to call them a friend, to let somebody else care about her. She's not necessarily happy with her current state of affairs, but she believes it's what she must do, that it's the path she must take. A very lonely path.

[Bellosh]

Sorry for the long wait, but here I am at last! Judging by how important combat skills are to your OC, I'd recommend switching her over to Canterlot Chronicles, since such characters don't really fit in a slice-of-life environment like World of Equestria. If you agree, change the RP Type field to "Canterlot Chronicles".

If you'd still like to keep this OC for WoE, you should give Shadow Fang an occupation other than being a hunter or scout. Think of ways she can contribute to the pack's well-being that lend themselves to slice-of-life situations while maintaining the basic characterization for her. I hope this helps!

[Smartbrony]

Alright. I've change her occupation from Hunter to Gatherer. As such, I removed the hunter training and her fighting other kids.

I'm not sure if this meets your standards now, but I'm ready for feedback.

[Bellosh]

Ah good, this app's making progress. Just a little more feedback to take into account:

• Remove the mention of Anubis. Users should be able to figure out how your character looks like without searching Google to figure out who Anubis was.
  
• Personally, I think you're better off incorporating the hidden depths of your diamond dog into the main body of the app itself. Just make sure to specify that such traits aren't dominant yet, which will clue in users to expect the more harsh side of your OC at first.
  
• Remove the line "There are some dogs in the pack that consider her a friend, others that consider her an enemy, and more that could care less about her". Apps shouldn't mention how other characters view an OC.
  

Once the suggested changes are made, I think we will be able to move this OC along.

[Smartbrony]

Well, it took a little while, but I've finally gotten around to fixing this. So, whadya think?

[Armony]