Pegasus Thunder Flash [FINAL]

[ThunderFlash]

Roleplay Type: Mane RP

Name: Thunderflash

Sex: Male

Age: Stallion

Species: Pegasus

Eye Color:Yellow

Coat Color: Dark-gray

Mane/Tail/Markings Color & Style: Naturally black hair, with yellow highlights.

Physique: A slender, healthy pony. Taller then most, but not by a lot.

Cutie Mark: A lightning bolt with wings, going straight through a fluffy white cloud

Origin/Residence: Canterlot

Occupation: Weather Pony, but wishes to be part of the Wondercolts someday.

Motivation: To see the happy faces of a pony when the dark, gloomy stormclouds part and reveal the sun.

Likes: The sounds of thunder and rain / sunny days / happiness

Dislikes: The cold / losing / sour foods

Character Summary: Thunderflash tends to come off as a hyper and active pony, moving around in some way or another. He doesn't seem to ever calm down, and some tend to say he's rather childish. He does show self-control when the situation calls for it. He doesn't seem to mind that he can go a bit out of control, and associates this with the comparison he often gets from others; a lightning bolt.

Thunder was born in Canterlot, while his parents came from Cloudsdale. They moved on a whim, and seemed to like the bustling city of Canterlot. He himself also enjoys it. His parents (known as Ma and Pops by him) are key parts to his life. Pops works as a Weather Pony, who takes care of snow clouds. Ma stayed hom to watch over him as he grew, and has now grown into a healthy, dependable young stallion. Thunder now currently lives alone in a one-pony aparentment, and also works as a Weather Pony.

Ma and Pops are actually fairly calm, normal indivuals. They were never really sure where Thunder's energy came from, but they say it made raising him that much more fun. In terms of relationships, Thunder and his parents have a healthy bond between child and parents. Thunder enjoys their visits, and enjoys their company. He managed to become a Weather Pony thanks to Pops. He put in a good word for Thunder, and he first vollenteered his son to help out. After seeing that he was natural, Thunder was hired shortly after, and has been working this way since.

Thunder had always loved the booming sound of, well, thunder. The heavy pelting of rain against a window would lull him to sleep on certain nights, and it perplexed his parents. Truth be told, Thunder was never scared of loud noises like lightning crackling, or the like. He would sit in awe of the cool, split-second image that a lighting bolt would leave, and thought the boom of thunder was really neat. One day, in the park, he was playing with his friends. They all were havign a great time, until a large stormcloud formed, and scared away his friends with it's loud sounds, and threatening rain. Quickly a young Thunderflash zipped up and pushed the cloud away, being that he was a Pegasus. His friends cheered for him, since he had saved the day from a rainy day inside! His cutie mark faded in, and he was overjoyed.

Thunder absolutely loves to race, and can never say no to a challenge. He wants to join the Wonderbolts someday, but his modesty leaves him to believe that he'll never quite be good enough, though he certainly does try.

When hyper, or nervous, Thunder tends to stamp a hoof repeadetly. He taps at random intervals, much how like lightning striking tends to be very random as well.

[ThunderFlash]

I edited this a tad, giving Thunder a teensy bit more info. He now is more interested in being a Weather Pony, and volenteers as one. I'm now happy for any kind of evaluation that someone may give.

[ThunderFlash]

MAJOR EDIT.

I realize that I had made a terribly large amount of mistakes on my previous attempt, so now I've gone an revamped Thunderflash by starting from scratch.

[Pony_Sage]

Hay there, just wanted to stop by and lend a helping hoof. I do have to say that you have an interesting character shaping up! First I would like to point out that the flying team is named the 'Wonderbolts' not the 'Wondercolts' namely because there are females in their ranks! Also, you are allowed to play a 'Wonderbolt' if you wish, just to let you know. On to the meat of the application now. I have to ask, does this character have a split personality or what is known as Dissociative Identity Disorder (DID) ? If indeed he does, I am going to have to ask you to change that, it is a little too real world and a tad dark for the 'Mane' RP ideals that are in place here. If he does not have DID, then you might want to rewrite his personality a tad, because he comes off as though he has DID. You have a good simple cuite-mark story, and some aspects of his personality, which when the kinks are worked out I am sure will be fine. There seems to be a little missing however. I would like to know more about his back story in general. His relationship with his parents maybe, or some background on how he became a weather pony. Also him preforming an act such as the 'Thundercolt' that you outline is a copy of the Sonic Rainboom is a little too much. Since we use cast members as the top of the line ideal, having an OC that could compete with the prowess of Rainbow Dash seems a tad over the top.

I am sure that if you take these ideas into consideration that Thunderflash here will soon be lighting up the skies of Equestria!

~Sage AkA Freddie Freewings

[ThunderFlash]

Hay there, just wanted to stop by and lend a helping hoof. I do have to say that you have an interesting character shaping up! First I would like to point out that the flying team is named the 'Wonderbolts' not the 'Wondercolts' namely because there are females in their ranks! Also, you are allowed to play a 'Wonderbolt' if you wish, just to let you know. On to the meat of the application now. I have to ask, does this character have a split personality or what is known as Dissociative Identity Disorder (DID) ? If indeed he does, I am going to have to ask you to change that, it is a little too real world and a tad dark for the 'Mane' RP ideals that are in place here. If he does not have DID, then you might want to rewrite his personality a tad, because he comes off as though he has DID. You have a good simple cuite-mark story, and some aspects of his personality, which when the kinks are worked out I am sure will be fine. There seems to be a little missing however. I would like to know more about his back story in general. His relationship with his parents maybe, or some background on how he became a weather pony. Also him preforming an act such as the 'Thundercolt' that you outline is a copy of the Sonic Rainboom is a little too much. Since we use cast members as the top of the line ideal, having an OC that could compete with the prowess of Rainbow Dash seems a tad over the top.

I am sure that if you take these ideas into consideration that Thunderflash here will soon be lighting up the skies of Equestria!

~Sage AkA Freddie Freewings

Alrighty, I've addressed the issues that you've noted. Hopefully this is more to the liking.

And I almost headdesked at the Wondercolt thing. That must have been a typo, because I dind't mean for that to happen

[Pony_Sage]

"Assessed!" Thus spake the Sage.

[Skye]