Ask Izzy!

[Cathalos]

would you take me?

[TheInvisiblePony]

But of course!

[Cathalos]

cool. why wont my mum allow me to chew on things?

[TheInvisiblePony]

Ah, a simple question. Your mother will not let you chew on things because she is one of the few people who know that chewing on things causes more injuries than falling vending machines and walrus attacks combined. It really is a risky game, chewing things.

[Cathalos]

do you live in a house or what? what happens when you need to open the door and theres some old guy sitting on his porch staring at your door?

[TheInvisiblePony]

A house? Yes, I live in a house. As for the solicitor problem, I usually call up security to handle it for me.

By which I mean I call upon my roommate.

By which I mean I grab the scarecrow in my closet and mimic a poor British accent. At least there's the laser defense system.

By which I mean a lawn flamingo which I poke the more stubborn solicitors with until they panic and run.

[Cathalos]

you ever thought of taking them and then making them dig an underground replica of the grand canyon? with spoons?

[TheInvisiblePony]

Two steps ahead of you, my dear Cathalos!

You see, I've already dug out a model of the grand canyon with spoons. To scale of course. And it looks more like a crater than a canyon, but no one is judging for accuracy.

[Cathalos]

scale or actual size?

do you know how happy it makes me that you said that line and didn't call me cathy?

[TheInvisiblePony]

to answer your questions in order

1) Scale. I lack the permits and lands to do anything larger than a five-by-five replica

2) I think I have a good idea, judging from the context in the question.

[Cadabra]

Hugs, kisses, or Swedish fishes?

[TheInvisiblePony]

Kisses, easily. Haven't you had those little chocolates? Delicious!

[Cadabra]

Love 'em! Do you have a favorite candy?

[Cathalos]

do you like socks?

[Cadabra]

What's so bad it's good?

[TheInvisiblePony]

Gah! Question overload!

Cathalos - Socks are simply so stunningly superb its almost surprisingly strange.

Cadabra 1st question - A favorite candy of mine would have to be an old little thing called a Wonder Ball. Shame they stopped making 'em.

2nd question - Puns. Puns are simply so awful, so lazy, so borderline uncreative... that they're actually just as close to genius. Just as long as they aren't pun-ishable by law.

[Cadabra]

Gah! Question overload!

Cathalos - Socks are simply so stunningly superb its almost surprisingly strange.

Cadabra 1st question - A favorite candy of mine would have to be an old little thing called a Wonder Ball. Shame they stopped making 'em.

2nd question - Puns. Puns are simply so awful, so lazy, so borderline uncreative... that they're actually just as close to genius. Just as long as they aren't pun-ishable by law.

Wonderballs were AWESOME! You ever wonder what was in your Wonderball? (Don't pun-nish me too fiercely.)

Is it just me or are all the tasty tidbits of our childhood going up in economic fire? I know people are getting more health conscience these days, but government food regulations are gerting a little ridiculous. The Obamas are all for government approved chicken nuggets in school. Think our kids will one day wax poetic about government nuggets?

Well, that got dark quickly.

[Cathalos]

can you go back in time and kick 13 year old me for being 13?

[TheInvisiblePony]

Well, maybe. But then you'd have a negative opinion of me for kicking you when you were 13, and that wouldn't get us anywhere. Not to mention it would cause all sorts of problems with the wibbly wobbly time sphere.

[Cathalos]

after experiencing what i experienced today, i would not have a problem with the memory of being kicked as long as i knew it was for this purpose. so please?

[Cadabra]

Can I have your liver then?

[TheInvisiblePony]

after experiencing what i experienced today, i would not have a problem with the memory of being kicked as long as i knew it was for this purpose. so please?

Oh, if only because you said please. Now, if you don't have any memories of a random person kicking you as a thirteen year old, chances are I kicked the wrong person. But I'll certainly try!

Can I have your liver then?

I apologize, I'm rather fond of my liver. I even named him Larry. Larry the liver. Yes.

[Cathalos]

where do you buy your tomatoes?

[TheInvisiblePony]

Same place I buy my Tah-maw-toes, of course.

I also buy my potatoes and pa-tah-toes there too.

'There' being the semantics supermarket

[Cathalos]

who was in charge last night and how can i make him stop breathing without getting caught?