Canterlot [Army Ball - ARMY ONLY] The Roast of Shining Armor [CLOSED]

[Dio]

The ballroom was abuzz with activity. With hors d’oeuvres and drink in hoof, ponies made their way to their tables, eagerly chatting about the upcoming events on the program. A roast? The voices asked. A comedy show? At the Army Ball? Weren’t the guardsponies merely humorless accessories to the crown? As if to answer their collective questions, a drumroll started up. Colonel Ironwing stepped onto the stage to the fanfare of trumpets, lifting his beret in greeting to the gathered crowd as he approached the microphone. Grabbing the implement in his hooves, he began to speak.

“Fillies and gentlecolts of the Royal Equestrian Army! Friends, family, and avid supporters! I welcome you all to the First Annual Army Ball! We gather here today to honor those who serve, who have served, and who will serve. The Army life isn’t an easy one, but it’s one that every guardspony relishes.” The retired colonel took a moment to adjust his glasses before continuing.

“I myself was a wide-eyed cadet once, making my way through OCS, picking up a degree somewhere in there, and eventually landing a commission in the service of Her Majesty. Although I suppose now it would be Her MajestIES.” A smattering of chuckles rose from the audience as the colonel went on. “I’m seeing a lot of new faces here tonight. Either the optometrist messed up my prescription again or I’m going as senile as my son says I am!”

“But enough about me!” he said with a flourish. “No matter how old we get or how many guard rotations we get stuck in, I always knew the REA boys and girls to be able to throw a great party. And what a party this is! What better way is there to celebrate those who work so tirelessly for us, especially the one in charge of our own Canterlot garrison?”

“You might know him as the face of the REA, the Shield, or Captain Equestria, depending on who you talk to, but there’s no question about his dedication to service and good leadership. Fillies and gentlecolts, tonight we honor a soldier, officer, gentlecolt, scholar, and model Equestrian, our very own SHINING ARMOR!”

The spotlight was nothing new to Shining Armor. After the high profile wedding and the craziness of the Crystal Empire, he was something of a local celebrity. Fame wasn’t his favorite part of the job, but he could certainly handle it so long as he had Cadence by his side. When the retired colonel had approached him about the roast, he was enthusiastic. After all, who wouldn’t want to get in on some good fun and comedy? The captain stood from his guest table and took a bow for his audience before quietly sitting back down.

“So now let’s bring up the first of many roasters to pat you on the back... or kick you in the flank if they so choose! Our first roaster tonight is here with her charm, her wit, and her husband’s reins in hoof, Princess Mi Amore Cadenza!”