Pegasus Black Storm [Final]

[ShyFluttershy]

Roleplay Type:

World of Equestria Mane RP

Name:

Black Storm

Sex:

Male

Age:

Stallion

Species:

Pegasus

Eye colour:

Red

Coat colour:

Red Base Coat with some Black Stripes on the body

Mane/Tail/Markings colour & Style:

Mane is medium length, light purple and pink. Tail is long, same colour as mane.

Physique:

Black is of medium height, Not too strong, skinny but not very skinny, around average size of a normal stallion

Cutie Mark:

Black's Cutie mark is a guitar and a saxophone crossing at the neck of the guitar and the neck of the sax with some 8th notes right above them off slightly to the right looking at it..

Origin/Residence:

He states Fillydalphia, currently looking for somewhere to reside.

Occupation:

Black is a jazz musician for a living, he had been doing it for many years before until he was finally able to make it a living.

Motivation:

To play music in memory of his teacher and friend Mr. Colt-trane

Character Summary:

Black Storm's earliest memories were from Fillydalphia. He never really knew his parents so he didn't know where he was born, but if anypony asked, he would say Fillydalphia. He was raised for a little while in an orphanage for many years. While there he picked up clarinet and started playing. After a little while though, he had had enough of being in the orphanage and decided to go out to the world himself. He walked the streets of Fillydalphia daily, still going to the orphanage to sleep as it was a comfortable place. At this time, he met Mr. Colt-trane. He spent the next few years learning from him and hearing stories of the jazz he used to play when he was a young stallion. (Refer to above section for filler here) After he received his cutie mark, he was a colt. He decided to set out to do what he planned on years ago, to see the world. During the time from Fillydalphia to everywhere he traveled, he walked everywhere, carrying his instruments on a harness he made shoddily himself. He would travel to many different towns, including Los Pegasus, Cloudsdale, Baltimare, and a few others just playing music. Music had become his true love, his passion for everything. He made no friends along the way and only heard about some various news, but nothing that affected him directly. He was a traveling musician that, without knowing it, was making it big. Soon he was playing in major venues in major cities, and not even worrying if he was getting paid for it or not. He was playing music for a living, it was all he could ask for. He still searches for his parents to this day, but has finally decided he wishes to settle down. If he has not found them by now, He wasn't sure if he ever would. He has been looking around many places to finally rest, just looking for a quiet place, and he came across Ponyville on the maps.

Cutie Mark Story:

When Black was much younger, he received his first instrument in Fillydalphia. He practiced day in and day out on it, it was a clarinet. As he was walking down the streets, he heard a stallion playing a Saxophone, he wasn't sure what it was at the time, but he enjoy the sounds very much. He decided to see if this stallion would be willing to teach him sometime. After talking for a bit, Black learned that this saxophonist was in fact, a very famous one, a Mr. Colt-trane. Black played with him every day, learning everything he could. over the years, he was getting very good at this to the point where Mr. Colt-trane struggled to keep up. Black was given a Selmer SBA, Mr. Colt-tranes very first saxophone and a guitar that wasn't in use anymore. "You have great talent young one, take care of these always, you will be able to learn to play any instrument you set your mind to and you will be able to go far." With those final words, Black left with the two instruments and has never heard from his old friend again. He practiced and learned guitar by himself over the next couple of months and once he was playing both, he got his cutie mark one night while just practicing and took no notice until the next morning.

Personality:

Black is a fairly timid pony. He has never taken much to being social. The only time he truly had was when he had met Mr. Colt-trane. Their relationship was booming, he was the father Black had never had. Other than this, he has shied away from society, only speaking to others when they requested him to play music or making other deals. He never went out and made friends. He does not see anything wrong with ponykind, just never got along to get to know others. Upon meeting others, he is courteous but shy, and hopes they are as well.

Strengths and weaknesses:

Black is a musician. He has traveled Equestria carrying his instruments walking. He is a decent flier, able to keep off the ground and fly around, but not the best. He has high endurance from traveling and a good lung capacity from music. He does not know much about the settle life as he was always traveling. He is sort of anti-social and has some issues when talking about family.

Additional story information:

Black had traveled to Fillydalphia once to see if his father figure Mr. Colt-trane was still around. Black was now a professional saxophone player and wanted to thank Mr. Colt-trane for his success. Upon arrival to the very familiar apartment, he learned Mr. Colt-trane had passed away due to age. Black was strongly upset at this and has never returned to Fillydalphia. Upon leaving, Black was given some personal items that had been left behind. Mr. Colt-trane's other saxophone, some photo's of them together, signed copies of all of Mr. Colt-trane's albums, and a note taped to a folder. The note read "Dear Black, I had hoped to see you before my time had passed, but if you get this note, it is too late. I would like to thank you for giving me one of the best students, friends, and son's an old stallion could ask for. Never forget your music, it is your passion and that is clear. Do not become sad by my passing, make sure I live on through your music. In this folder is all of my music I have ever played, and some that the world has not heard. Revise it however you wish, but keep it true. I know this will be easy for you to do. Live on and don't let the music die. Sincerely, Mr. Colt-trane"

Every now and then, Black would travel around to orphanages and schools, playing for the young ponies, always remembering Mr. Colt-trane. He keeps the note inside of his saxophone case at all times as to never lose it, keep it where his heart is, in his music.

[ShyFluttershy]

hmm... is it possible to get a critique on this, I feel like it is not done yet, but can't think of anything to write at the time. please lol.

[Ironwing]

Hi there!

I am not an RP-Helper and i am not that experienced with critique. I´ve read your app and since you asked for a reply, i shall be the first one. I am not a native English speaker, hope that is ok for you.

First of all, i like your character. But i think some details are missing or should get a better description.

1. describe your motivation with more detail. Why exactly does Lonely Shadow want to hear the tunes of Mr. Colt-trane? What is his dream? Is there something else he wants to achieve? If he wants to hear the music of Mr. Colt-trane again, why won´t he go back to Fillydalphia?
   
2. What is your characters relationship to Mr. Colt-trane? Was he like a friend? Or a father? How many years did your character spend on his side? If his motivation is to hear tunes from him why did he leave him?
   
3. What does your character like or dislike? Is there something your character is very good at, or does he have any flaws?
   
4. I read your story now, but i have not found anything that would describe your characters personality. Whats your character like? Is he friendly, hasty, social, couraged? How does your character react to something new or unexpected? If another pony would meet your character for the first time, what would be the first impression?
   
5. If you don´t have a character picture, just go here and have fun: Pony Creator
   

I hope that i could help you with some ideas. I don´t know how long it will take that a real rp-helper shows up because i´m waiting for one like you. ^^

Iron Wing

[Mojo]

Hi ShyFluttershy!

Looks like Ironwing has given you some good advice.

From what I can see, your app is well written with each of the required fields filled in.

So he's an orphan? Does he have any link to the Equestria Orphanage?

[ShyFluttershy]

tyvm ^_^ I will edit it and continue to improve his story when i have chances, college classes are getting rediculous lately x.x

[Rosewind]

Any progress on this application?

[ShyFluttershy]

Sorry, Writing out a story for him right now. Using it for my English class too :3 As soon as I get through some of my writers block, I will be updating this as much as possible.

[ShyFluttershy]

wrote some more entries, I hope it is alright that I just added another section for the story, it would have been difficult to add that in somewhere x.x

[ShyFluttershy]

a decent amount of updates have been done explaining Black more as well as more historical information on him. Hopefully can see where I am now and see what I need to do still for approval. ^_^

[RarityDash]

Heh. I think you're ready here... so:

[ShyFluttershy]

Tyvm ^_^