BeGoneThots Posted February 2, 2016 Report Share Posted February 2, 2016 Dead Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Blueblood Posted February 2, 2016 Report Share Posted February 2, 2016 Hm, I'm really liking this concept here! A couple of things, though. First, adult-onset cutie marks aren't passable in WoE; it would make more sense for him to have gotten it in a lecture hall as a student than a teacher. Second, I would like to see at least a sentence or two about his military career, even if it was uneventful (as it probably was, given how peaceful Equestria was at the time). Perhaps a few peacetime disaster relief operations might have really hit home about what it takes to rebuild a community and keep it prosperous? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BeGoneThots Posted February 2, 2016 Author Report Share Posted February 2, 2016 hmm I didnt mean it that he was an adult. just that he was older. Out of school, but still young and in basic camp. Giving a lecture to his fellow cadets about what it meant to him to BE part of the REA. gonna reword that. as for peacetime efforts. maybe so. Im still leafing through my creations on him and determining what would be considered legal here. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Blueblood Posted February 2, 2016 Report Share Posted February 2, 2016 Hm, that looks alright, now. I'll pass it on for second review. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RainbowFoxxy Posted February 2, 2016 Report Share Posted February 2, 2016 Second review Overall this character is looking good. One thing I would like to see added is how he came about his great skills with fire magic. Was he trained? Did it just come to him? Perhaps use this for a little deeper character development. Let me know here when you've had a chance to look this over. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BeGoneThots Posted February 2, 2016 Author Report Share Posted February 2, 2016 Was going to be the same as his son Flashfire's abilities. Parents to child training but that went about as well as a stubbed toe so I will likely make it just lots of practice anb hard work until he can't perform other forms of magic Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BeGoneThots Posted February 3, 2016 Author Report Share Posted February 3, 2016 done Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RainbowFoxxy Posted February 3, 2016 Report Share Posted February 3, 2016 Looks good to me! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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