Chapien

Hmm. That could work, it would make it a lot easier for me to meet up with your character. ^^

Sparks nodded. "Just point me in the right direction and I'm sure I'll find a place to stay. I could stay just about anywhere, so I do not mind the conditions." He glanced towards the lab. It wasn't quite as large as the facilities back in Stalliongrad, but it was still rather massive, at least in width, if not height. "Will I be shown the interior of the building tomorrow, as well as my workspace?"

No, of course you don't, and I prefer a lack of tragedy/drama. It isn't even necessary. But a little detail can go a long way; I'm not asking for a massive, long explanation. Just a bit of motivation goes a long way. I am just confused as to why he wants such a great degree of separation from his parents if he maintains good relations with them; that is to say, why would he separate himself from his parents entirely? Independence is one thing, complete disassociation is another. Perhaps I am simply misunderstanding the application.

Hello hello! This is a pretty good application and a fascinating character. I feel the biggest problem, however, is the grammar. Some of it is a bit hard to understand and there are a number of typos- this can usually be overlooked, but it would be nice if you could polish it up just a tiny bit more! I do have a few questions. First, I feel that the cutie mark story could be expanded on- what exactly did she paint, why was her brother upset, what inspired her to paint/sing to cheer him up (or was it a random decision)? The Cutie Mark Story is overall pretty good; it could just be more detailed. Why did she get so upset at her parents for moving? I understand that many hate moving (myself included) because of the loss of friends and the need to find more friends, but you were not very specific beyond the fact that she was upset. Finally, her personality change; you said she was a bit more inward/shy as a child, but is a lot louder and more social as an adult- what exactly prompted this change? Other than that this is an interesting character that I hope to see more of.

I am unsure, but my policy is always "The more, the merrier!" ^^ I could possibly meet up with your character, but I may need help devising an in-character reason to do so. My character is an intern for the company NSI, and works at their Manehatten office, so I'd have to find out an excuse for him to be out of the city. Vacation, maybe?

I'm always interested in RP. My character is Gears "Sparks" Clockwise, and although his application says he is in Stalliongrad, a bit has changed since then (Role-play WOO) and he is now in Manehatten, though I am sure he can wind up just about anywhere.

I did, and it does make sense, but it would still be nice to know what exactly gave him his initial flare for the dramatic. Was he inspired by his parents? Also, if he still has a good relationship with his parents, why does he try to distance himself from them?

Sparks nodded. "Of course. I don't expect, nor desire, the best of the best- but a warm bed would certainly be desirable. Do you know of a reasonable place near the laboratory facilities? Or will I have to travel a distance?"

Sparks thought for a moment, not wanting to impose on who was essentially his new boss. "Well, if need be I am fine with staying in lesser conditions. After all, I am used to it, and have had to spend nights in the Kuznitza district of Stalliongrad, which I am fairly certain is far worse than anything in this city, as bad as it can apparently be. However... if you are willing, then I would be more than honored to accept your proposal."

He frowned for a moment, and looked back at his saddle bag. "Nyet... well, I have some bits, but I am not sure what I would be able to afford. In Stalliongrad it is easy to find accommodations but... Manehatten, I hear it is more expensive here, da? And I am unsure as to where I could stay, anyway..."

"Organized Chaos, eh?" He continued to follow Vivid closely, absorbing everything she said and the various sights of his surroundings like a sponge. "Da, it would be difficult to construct anything in any of these tall buildings." "I will be briefed on the task at hand once we arrive, da? I remember you mentioning it in brief when I first arrived- I believe I already have a few helpful ideas."

Sparks nodded, looking at the NSI office structure. "Well, the city is certainly cleaner than the Kuznitza District of my home, and even the Rasya District- It's nice. Though it seems like it would be rather easy to get lost, nyet?" He remained silent after that for a few moments, following Vivid, before continuing, "How far away is the lab facility, anyway? I am curious to see how big it is. If it's scale is anything like what I've seen so far, I am sure I cannot be disappointed. Also, I understand that I will be renting my apartment myself- but where will I be staying my first night?"

Sparks followed alongside Vivid, listening idly and taking in all of the awe-inspiring sights around him. He had always thought that Stalliongrad was big; but compared to this, it was nothing. Manehatten was just as diverse as Stalliongrad, if not moreso, with ponies of all shapes and sizes roaming the streets. Unlike Stalliongrad, which was for the most part rigid and structured in a grid-like manner, Manehatten was sprawling and unorganized, a metropolis of all shapes and sizes. "I... I must say. I expected it to be big, maybe as big as Stalliongrad, but this... this is huge."

A sting from a manticore is dangerous, and should be acceptable.

Sparks grinned. "Of course. I already know a little bit about the Railroad project, but not much. I can't wait to start." He began to follow Vivid as she stepped forward. "Of course. Lead on! I'd love to see the city, and where I'll be working for the next few weeks."

Sounds good, just make sure to post here once you make the necessary edits so that I can review it one last time.

The story on how he got injured is still a bit confusing to me. Please remember that everything has to fit as if it were something from the show itself. The Cutie Mark story is good enough, I'd say, though more expansion is never a bad idea. As for the injury, we need as many details about it as possible. I'm just concerned that if you leave it vague and we approve the application, you may divulge what happened in its entirety later in RP and it may contradict the spirit of the Role-play. It is fine to leave a backstory a bit vague to leave room to expand on it, but details like this need to be entirely sorted out beforehand.

Loving the Crystal Fair song. I've already listened to it at least four times.

Sparks smiled. "Yes, of course I've received my basic training. And I wouldn't worry- I think you'll find that I'll meet any expectations you throw at me." Sparks was actually really excited to finally be here. He had been waiting for nearly a week with next to nothing to do back in Stalliongrad after completing his basic training; sure, he had some basic errands and small repairs he had to complete here and there, but no real projects to work on. Finally he would be back to doing what he loved- building and innovating. However, the more he thought about the upcoming weeks he would be spending in Manehatten, the more nervous he became. "Of course, uh, my forte has always been Clockwork. I'm not entirely sure about my skills outside of that field."

Fear of the unknown. What one believes does not contribute to their feelings of loneliness or isolation; rather, it is what those around him believe. As for being on the fringe, I know exactly what you mean. I'm an Atheist in a mostly religious community, I am an utter history nerd (though I personally prefer the writing and creation of alternate history over re-enactment). I also play Dungeons and Dragons (Well, Pathfinder, but there isn't much of a difference really), and though I have four IRL brony friends, most of my friends do not share our enthusiasm. Finally, my rather outspoken and unusual political views often push me to the fringe in the eyes of others. But I cope by going on the internet and finding like-minded people. There will always be people who agree with you- always.

Sparks nodded, listening intently to everything the hippogriff said. "Yes, understood, of course! The real reason I'm here is to work- it has been far too long since I have done any real mechanics outside of some clockwork repairs- and I'm really eager to get started! But of course, I'd love to see the city. It's always been my dream to leave Stalliongrad and..." he trailed off, realizing he was rambling. He took a deep breath, and nodded. "Right then. I do have a few questions. Primarily, what will the accommodations be and when can I start?"

Hello and Good Morning! This is a nice application, but I just have a few questions! First and foremost, your application is a bit contradictory. Your origin states he is originally from Fet Loch, which is completely fine, but your story states he is from Hooferville, which does not actually exist in the World of Equestria Mane RP. Can you clarify that for me? Second, could you give us some more details on the character's personality? For example, what is it like to actually be around him? How does he treat other ponies? Is he kind? I understand he's a bit of a bragger; can you state a bit more than that? Also, characters can not have a history involving show characters- your character cannot have met Trixie. Sorry, but it is a rule. ^^; Also, what got him so fascinated in story telling and music? It is great to know his passion, but WHY is it his passion? Other than that this is a good application, it just needs a little work! ^^

Sparks was a little startled by the sudden appearance of the hippogriff, still obviously quesy from the train ride. "O-oh! Hello! That's me. Gears Clockwise!" He smiled nervously. "And you must be Vivid Flair? It's a pleasure to meet you! I...I've always wanted to visit Manehatten. Or well, anywhere outside of Stalliongrad. It's really nice. And big. And warm." He was obviously rambling, but he didn't seem to notice.

Sparks got off of the train, legs shaking a little. He had never had taken a trip on a train before; let alone a trip as long as the trip from Stalliongrad to Manehatten, almost clean across Equestria, and he felt like he was going to vomit when he exited. When he first stepped out of the train, his legs wobbled a little and he nearly fell over, before regaining his posture. Finally looking up from the floor, he immediately felt woozy again. To say that the Manehatten train station was impressive was an understatement of the most massive proportions. It was massive, and the buildings beyond were even bigger, larger even than the buildings he was used to in Stalliongrad. Barely holding back his urge to be sick, he began to walk forward uneasily. He was looking for his NSI contact here in Manehatten, a hippogriff named Vivid Flair, someone who surely wouldn't be too hard to meet and should be waiting for him here. Taking a deep breath, he began to search the station, keeping an eye open, still feeling rather queezy.

Welcome to Canterlot! I hope you enjoy your stay!