Pegasus Copper Thorn (Final)

[jim]

Name: Copper Thorn (Mane RP)

Nickname: Hot Wings

Role Play World of Equestria RP

Species: Pegasus

Sex: Female

Pelt color: Copper Brown

Mane / Tail/ Wings: Yellow

Style: Curly; like Pinkie Pie

Eye color: Midnight blue

Age: Pony/Filly

Physique: muscular; strong for her size

Cutie mark: Yellow wing with flames on top

Origin: a small suburb of Trotingham. Moved to Cloudsdale for more opportunities

bought a small bungalow next to Cloudsale weather station

Occupation: Free Lance Aerial Acrobat and Racer. Works for circuses, special events, etc.

Motivation/Dreams: to join the Wonderbolts before settling down with a nice stallion.

Likes: Fresh Hay, Flying in an open sky and doing barrel rolls, Watching other professonal aerial acrobats

Dislikes: Practical Jokes, weak fliers, loneliness

Background and Character Summary:

Copper Thorn was supposed to be a boy, but came out a girl. Her parents, A gardener and landscape artist and a school teacher were disappointed, but decided her name would be her pelt color. They saw that was she was strong for her age and encouraged her tendency toward Tom Boy play and daring activities like jumping cloud to cloud, acrobatics, racing and other fast paced activities. Copper Thorn was a quick leaner and sailed through junior flight school and intermediate training. She wanted a cutie mark as she was being teased about it at school, but nothing came of it.

One day, she was racing some friends and doing simple acrobatics between races when a bystander said, “Miss you have some Hot Wings there!” She blushed at the compliment, and the nickname stuck. Once, after a trying set of aerial acrobatics, she felt herself tired but very happy about her achievement. The next day day she was racing her friends and as she flew, felt a jolt of adrenaline, like she was doing something she was born to do. The extra kick in her system, spurred her on and she won the race easily. Suddenly she felt a pang on her flank and her cutie mark appeared in the shape of a yellow wing with red flame tips on it,

From there on, she took acrobatic flying courses wherever they were offered and became a bit

of a daredevil as her confidence and ability increased. Finally, she realized she had outgrown her home near Trotingham and headed to the larger city of Cloudsdale. Her parents were sad to see her go, yet proud of how she had blossomed into an acrobatic and racing performer.

It wasn’t long before she made a name for herself as an acrobatic performer and was called upon to perform at aerial shows, and once as an opening act for than group that emulated the Wonderbolts Though she had never met or or seen the original up close... It was there that she saw other acrobatic pegasis in action and wanted to be like them. She wasn’t nearly as fast, however, despite her racing skill, so she concentrated on her maneuvers and acrobatics to become more like a professional. Even her yellow wings, once laughed at for looking “funny” drew attention as she was easy to spot in aerial shows and performed more tricks because of it.

She soon made enough bits to buy a small bungalow near weather central and struck up a casual friendship with her neighbors. One thing she disliked was being alone. She had spent all her youth learning and performing and left the few friends she had in

the suburbs of Trotingham. As a result, she was eager for company and struck up conversations with every new pony she met. Soons she had some friends but no boyfriend, something she really wanted but had been too busy to think about. All the pegasi colts considered her “one of the boys” so a relationship seemed out of the question. She kept hoping however, and asked some of the other ponies for dating tips. They all thought she was too much like a tomboy, though she was really less self absorbed and confident than some others.. She had to hope that her skill would attract a like minded pegasus stallion. Despite her tomboy ways, she was a girl underneath it all and wanted the love she had from her family and friends in Trotinghams suburb. She was talented, tried affecting the attitude of ‘Devil may care’ of other strong fliers, but under it all, was lonely. Even trips home had her parents too busy asking about her career and her latest accomplishments, than having much time to spend on actual family events.

They put such things off as unimportant compared to their talented daughter; never realizing that she wanted companionship and love, much more than praise.

This strengthened her resolve to be as good an acrobatic flyer as well as the best in equestria, gain their attention, and bury her inner unhappiness in her performances.

[MyLittlePonyTales]

You seem to be missing the Roleplay type... it's a little hard to assess without it, as the Assessment criteria is different for the Mane RP and Crossovers.

But, if you are going for Mane RP, here are my comments:

Origin Cumulus City; South of Cloudsdale

Hmm... I don't recall Cumulus city as part of our map. Please correct me if I'm wrong, there are a lot of locations to remember.

Moved to Cloudsdale to be closer to Rainbow Dash

bought a small bungalow near Rainbow Dash’s house

Motivation/Dream: To work with Rainbow Dash

Watching Rainbow Dash

It wasn’t long before she made a name for herself as an acrobatic performer and was called upon to perform at aerial shows, and once as an opening act for the Wonderbolts... It was there that she saw Rainbow Dash in action and wanted to be like her.

Okay, well, for starters, we don't allow prior relationships with Cast characters. It's okay to create a relationship through Roleplay, but no relations beforehoof.

The last bit also confuses me a bit, since Rainbow Dash isn't a Wonderbolt...

So, while your character's personality and backstory is fine at it's base—no Rainbow Dash.

[jim]

Hello Tales:

I appreciate your suggestions and have editted rainbow dash out of the character background.

Also, Added roleplay type of Mane RP

If you know where the map of Equestria is located, please let me know and I can easily change her hometown to something more canon

Thanks

Jim

[MyLittlePonyTales]

Well, if it's not on our map, your character can't live there. If we let one pony make up whatever place they wanted, lots of others would too, and we couldn't have a map because the world would constantly be changing. So, I'm going to ask you to remove references to Cumulus City.

Also, here is a full map: Pieces of the map are also located in the first topic of each section of Greater Equestria.

Name: Copper Thorn (Mane RP)

Just a quick question... you did read the Application Form, right? It explains what each part of your Application is for, and where the Roleplay Type (etc.) goes.

Likes: Fresh Hay, Flying in an open sky and doing barrel rolls, Watching Rainbow Dash

It was there that she saw Rainbow Dash in action and wanted to be like her.

These bits about Rainbow Dash still need to be removed as well, please.

She soon made enough bits to buy a small bungalow near weather central and struck up a casual friendship with her neighborsr, though nothing as serious as The BFFs ties to the other main ponies of Ponyville.

What do you mean by this?

[jim]

Gotcha! I removed all reference to rainbow dash and directly to the wonderbolts by using an "homage" group of fans. Surely she can know of them without seeing them or performing with them? They are famous in all of Equestria

She now comes from a suburb of Trotingham ( what is that a reference to anyway) sounds uppercrust type, so i put her in an unnamed suburb as Trotingham has no named suburbs on the map.

As for thh app, I read it but used my old character form and had the RP in a different spot and it slipped through. Sorry about that.

She is know Mane of Equstria RP

Thanks for your perusal and comments. They are a great help.

jim

[MyLittlePonyTales]

Gotcha! I removed all reference to rainbow dash and directly to the wonderbolts by using an "homage" group of fans. Surely she can know of them without seeing them or performing with them? They are famous in all of Equestria

You only needed to remove the RD stuff. Everything I saw about the Wonderbolts seemed fine. You're totally right that they are a famous performance group. RD is just a regular Pegasus, not somepony famous.

She now comes from a suburb of Trotingham ( what is that a reference to anyway) sounds uppercrust type, so i put her in an unnamed suburb as Trotingham has no named suburbs on the map.

Nottingham

[jim]

Thanks for the info . I will wait for any more suggestions and see if I can get accepted.

[brianblackberry]

It often gets forgotten but I need to mention again that not every little town or hamlet that would exist in Equestria is placed on the maps. The maps represent Equestria at the inter-regional level so it is safe to assume that the smaller villages and hamlets are not listed, even though they do exist; otherwise the map itself would become to cluttered. So a place like Cumulus City or a suburb of Trottingham is fine, as long as its established the places are small.

Other than that everything that Tales asked to be changed was changed, so:

For Great Justice!

[Skye]

[jim]

Thanks everyone. I shall try to make her memorable.

BTW, What is an awards bar anyway?