Mylittleponymylife Posted June 4, 2012 Report Share Posted June 4, 2012 Roleplay Type: World of Equestria RPName: Cotton Candy 'CanCanCotty'Sex: FemaleAge: Young Mare Species: UnicornEye Color: GreenCoat Color: PinkMain/Tail/Marking Color & Styles: Cotton Candy has a medium length hair style with shaggy bangs and a short tail that is kinda poofy. Her hair is a pinkish red with light blue streaks. Physique: Cotton Candy is average height and is only the tiniest bit skinnier than that.Cutie Mark: (can you guess?) Cotton Candy's cutie mark is a pink and blue cotton candy swirl.Origin/Residence: She was born in Ponyville but she lives in Hoofington now and she is trying to open up a candy shop.Occupation: She makes candy for a living and sells it in town at a stand she built. She is saving up to have an actual shop.Aspirations/Motivation: She really wants to have a candy shop of her own, it's what keeps her goingLikes: Candy!!!!!! She also likes making friends and painting. She's not very good at the latter though.Dislikes: She doesn't like ponies who think they are too cool for candy or for other ponies.Customer Summary:History: Cotton candy was born in Ponyville and lived there for the first years of her life. Then during her later foalhood, her family moved to Canterlot. She was extremely unhappy about the move and everyone in Canterlot thought she was weird because she wasn't prim and proper like they were. One day she found a candy shop and fell in love with it. She mastered the making of cotton candy first and the rest came after. Parents: Cotton Candy doesn't see her parent's very often anymore because she moved out at a young age. Her parents are ashamed of her non-prim lifestyle. They are the kind of pony who likes high end food who insist their plates be garnished with parsley and cilantro. When cottoncandy returned home with her cutie mark her parents freaked out. No not out of pride but out of shock. A cone of cotton candy? What a disgrace! So they sent her to hoofington where her grandmother lived. She has lived their since then. Only speaking to her parents about two or three times a year. Cutie Mark Story: One morning cottoncandy woke up and went into the candy shop her master owned. Her master had met her at a carnival. Cotton candy had been extremely hungry so she went to the nearest booth and bought a cone of cotton candy. She took one lick and her eyes widened. The booth was none other than her master, Lolly Palooza's.The day she got her cutie mark was a strange day. She went into the candy shop and she was preparing to clean up the counter when lolly palooza insisted that cottoncandy help her make the next batch of cotton candy. So she did. All day she tried and tried and each time, she failed. Then as she was about to give up she finished one ok batch. She felt the optimism return and she worked through the night until she perfecte the recipe even adding in a few extra ingredients. Then it happened. Her cutie mark appeared and she danced around in joy. Finally returning home to rest. Flaws: While training in the candy shop in canterlot she came across many different candy recipes. Although she tried with all her might she couldn't make a single one. She was about to give up when she found the recipe for cotton candy which she mastered. From the day she got her cutie mark and forever after she never gave up and now she is an amazing candy cook. She also is hides behind a mask of optimism and she regrets that. Personality: Cottoncandy is an overly optimistic pony on the outside but once you get through all the out layers you will find a sad pony with a talent she is ashamed of. She has never shown anyone her true self but it is there all the same. She often talks about shallow things that wouldn't let on to her real feelings. She is constantly on the move. Jumping up and down, dancing, singing songs about candy, making candy, and other activities of that nature. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Armony Posted June 10, 2012 Report Share Posted June 10, 2012 Hi there, you've got a really interesting character here, there's just a few points in the summary I want to address.First, the use of hard numbers is generally frowned upon, in this case because we don't know how quickly the ponies of Equestria mature (Adulthood could be much longer or shorter than eighteen years in their world). Replacing these with something more vague like "was born in Ponyville and lived there during most of her foalhood" would get the same point across without needing specific numbers. I would also point out here that filly is still kind of a young age to be moving out on her own, and owning a stand that sells candy isn't much different from owning a shop that sells candy at her age.Second, the comparison to Pinkie Pie in her personality could be replaced with a much more descriptive and unique character, while still maintaining the same character you have in mind. What is it that makes her annoying? What does she do that makes her "random"?And third, some general expansion and fleshing out could be done with the rest of the summary. Maybe tell us a bit more about her parents, or expand on the events leading up to her gaining her cutie mark? There's definitely a lot of potential here, and I can't wait to see what you do with it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mylittleponymylife Posted June 11, 2012 Author Report Share Posted June 11, 2012 Thanks So much for the feedback. I will definitely use it to enhance my charrie. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Armony Posted June 11, 2012 Report Share Posted June 11, 2012 Excellent Please reply again once you've finished making edits so I can take another look over your character. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mylittleponymylife Posted June 11, 2012 Author Report Share Posted June 11, 2012 I edited it. Hope it's better Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mylittleponymylife Posted June 11, 2012 Author Report Share Posted June 11, 2012 Is the cutie mark story too off topic? I thought I should mention who her master is. AlsoConsidering I may make her be a charrie. Or someone else could use her I suppose. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Armony Posted June 11, 2012 Report Share Posted June 11, 2012 I think the cutie mark story is fine, and I love the detail that's brought this application to life! I don't see anything else in it to comment on, so I'm sending you on your way up! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mylittleponymylife Posted June 11, 2012 Author Report Share Posted June 11, 2012 Thank you thankyouthankyou!!!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mylittleponymylife Posted June 14, 2012 Author Report Share Posted June 14, 2012 Hey everyone I just wanted to say that if you're interested you can use the idea of Lolly palooza. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mylittleponymylife Posted June 19, 2012 Author Report Share Posted June 19, 2012 I would realllllllly appreciate it if someone would check this app out.... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
GreyMatter Posted June 19, 2012 Report Share Posted June 19, 2012 They work from the bottom, so this isn't helping you. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mylittleponymylife Posted June 19, 2012 Author Report Share Posted June 19, 2012 Really? I do appreciate the info it certainly helps Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dio Posted June 19, 2012 Report Share Posted June 19, 2012 Please be patient while we move you to the Roleplayers group so you can start RPing! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Recommended Posts