Xiee Posted October 10, 2011 Report Share Posted October 10, 2011 Name: InsightSex: MaleAge: Young StallionSpecies: UnicornPelt Color: WhiteMane/Tail/Markings Color & Style: His mane is sort of grayish, normal flowing and decently kept. His tail is fairly decent as well, nicely kept but not extravagant.Eye Color: Blue (Wears glasses)Cutie Mark: An open book with magical swirly sparkles around it.Physique: Average build.Origin: CanterlotRoleplay Type: FIM/Show RoleplayOccupation: A magic researcher and scholar of Canterlot UniversityMotivation: Finding the mystery and “cure” behind his "handicap" for knowing the inner workings of magic but not able to perform them.Likes: Quiet places, reading, libraries, donuts and coffee, running around.Dislikes: Noisy places, noisy Ponies, Heights, being in one spot for a long time.Character Summary/Background:Insight was as ordinary as other young foals his age. He was curious about the world around him and always eager to learn something new. He was mostly attached to his mother who served as a teaching instructor's assistant at the Canterlot School of Magic. Accompanying her when she usually ran errands for the school's top instructors.Just like any normal day, he trotted along with his Mom to the different libraries magical knowledge. She was to pickup some old book or dusty scroll that one of the elder instructors needed. This particular day however, after procuring the said book, his Mom met an acquaintance and they began talking and catching up on old times. Seeing that this would take a while, he started to wander around the library in the hopes of keeping himself occupied. After a few minutes of wandering around, he finds himself near an old and “seemed-to-be-forgotten” section of the library. Amazed that no one was around, and having not to worry about his Mom warning him not to, he ran among the bookshelves happily. He took a wrong turn however and hit a bookshelf. All the books instantly crashed down on him as it formed a small pile with him buried in it. He struggled to get out of the pile and somehow managed to get his upper body out. With his hind legs still stuck in the books, he notices an open book in front of him. He paused and looked at its contents. At first he thought it was weird because all he saw were weird pictures. Some recognizable to be mountains, trees and other inanimate objects. Curious as he was, he flipped through the pages and saw nothing but those weird pictures. In no time, he was flipping through all the pages and something strange happened. All the pictures disappeared. It's as if the book was empty to begin with. Spooked at just what happened, he manages to free himself from the pile of books and runs back to his mother who had just finish talking with her old friend. Still spooked at what just happened, he keeps to himself as his mother taps her hoof on his head asking where he's been. He just shrugs it off and says that he was just fooling around.A few days later, he experiences something extraordinary. His mother was on substitute teacher duty that day. She was teaching a class of young colts and of course he was there as usual but in a corner waiting patiently for his Mom to finish. A question is thrown to the students about “levitating multiple objects in the air”. A young colt raises his hoof to answer, and doesn't quite get it right. A few other Ponies try to answer but none seem to get the right answer either. Baffled as he is, he goes right in front of the class and explains, clear and simple. His mother's jaw drops as she hears her son explain it spot on. Everypony checks their textbooks to verify if he's got it right and to their surprise, not only did he mention what the book said word for word, but also gave a detailed explanation that everypony could easily understand. Thinking this to be a fluke, they all start throwing questions about magic according to what their textbooks says. He answers most of them with little difficulty.Amidst the commotion, his mother notices a cutie mark appear on his flank. An open book with magic swirly sparkles around it. After class, he tells his mother what happened the other day in the library, about knocking down a bunch of books and looking at a strange book with nothing but pictures that disappears when he scans through it. Baffled by this mystery, his mother searches for the book but its nowhere to be found. The librarian did mention that she arranged a pile of books scattered on the floor in one section but did not find any books with nothing but blank pages.Hearing about this, the elders and instructors decide to give some special training and figure out a way why he cannot use magic like every other Unicorn. They also ponder as to what this mysterious book is, as nopony has heard of such a book before. He spends a few years in the school but he never finds out why he has this special talent in the first place. He could discern magic, its components and its inner makings but he could not do any magic himself. Apparently, the elders at school think that his deep knowledge in magic might have hampered his ability to actually use it. He was later admitted to the Magical Studies of Unicorns in Canterlot University where he continued to do his research.Now, as a young stallion, he decides to travel over Equestria to find a “cure” and “answer” to his special “talent”. Would he be able to use magic normally like every other Unicorn? Or would he be stuck like this for the rest of his life? He packs his bags, his little journal, a quill and some ink, a few supplies and travels to learn every bit of magic he may encounter and possibly help in "curing" his condition.Minor edit: I just took out the old attachment and used the gallery image that I uploaded. Thanks~ Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pony_Sage Posted October 11, 2011 Report Share Posted October 11, 2011 Well this is an interesting take on a pony. Someone who is good at the inner machinations of magic but can not seem to utilize the actual spells. Very interesting! First things first, you referred to him as a filly in the first paragraph, most likely a spelling mistake, happens to the best of us. Now on to the meat of the story. While you have the basic outline of a character's back story you are missing some important elements. One being how did Insight here come to get his cutie-mark, and what does it mean to him. Cutie-marks seem to be the manifestation of what that pony excels at and their special talent. But they also may have a special meaning to the ponies that carry them! They are a very unique and personal thing after all! Also his motivation is a little vague, this is the section that would describe what drives him to do what he does. Why does he wander? He is looking for a cure! Motivation right there! You could also add a little more intrigue with is father's disappearance. It seems a little rushed as it is, I like the idea don't get me wrong, but a little detail on that could go a long way!! All in all, work on the cutie-mark story, and add a little more meat to the app in the way of descriptions of his past, and Bob's you uncle, you have a great app!!~Sage AkA Freddie Freewings Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MyLittlePonyTales Posted October 14, 2011 Report Share Posted October 14, 2011 I agree with Pony_Sage, you should probably add a Cutie Mark story at the least. Also, I want to confer with some of the other staff, but I don't think there are magic wands in Equestria. So far, we haven't seen any in show, and I would think that Unicorn horns take the place of wands, since only Unicorns can use magic. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Xiee Posted October 14, 2011 Author Report Share Posted October 14, 2011 Thanks for the replies! This has been of great help to me. Yeah I made a few mistakes since I was creating this app while I was at work and I was a bit distracted. It's my day off tomorrow so I'll give it some time to work on the back story, motivation and the cutie mark. To tell you the truth, I really had a difficult time thinking of what cutie mark I would use. I just got a few ideas from the chatroom (thanks Zeal, Corsair, Zephyr!) and I'll try to work on it asap. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
flutterscotch Posted October 14, 2011 Report Share Posted October 14, 2011 I agree with Pony_Sage, you should probably add a Cutie Mark story at the least. Also, I want to confer with some of the other staff, but I don't think there are magic wands in Equestria. So far, we haven't seen any in show, and I would think that Unicorn horns take the place of wands, since only Unicorns can use magic.Which makes Trixie's cutie mark all the more baffling....(sorry, for some reason this huge image was all I could find on a clear version of it. G1 Magic Star also had a magic wand not that really matters...but WHAT ARE THEY HOLDING THEM WITH? Can non unicorns do magic with a wand? mysteriessss!) 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MyLittlePonyTales Posted October 14, 2011 Report Share Posted October 14, 2011 WELP. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BlindJester Posted October 14, 2011 Report Share Posted October 14, 2011 (╯°□°）╯︵ ┻━┻ 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Xiee Posted October 14, 2011 Author Report Share Posted October 14, 2011 Wow, didn't really notice Trixie's mark until now. Anyway, I'm working on a new cutie mark design. Was just talking to Ancre on the chat. He gave me some ideas to think about. ^^ Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Xiee Posted October 17, 2011 Author Report Share Posted October 17, 2011 Sorry, was sick for 2 days and stayed in bed all the time. I'll update it later when I'm out of the office. Promise >_< Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Xiee Posted October 18, 2011 Author Report Share Posted October 18, 2011 I've updated the app. I believe I re-wrote it almost completely XD. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Xiee Posted October 19, 2011 Author Report Share Posted October 19, 2011 There final. Hopefully this one is okay. @_@ Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
brianblackberry Posted October 21, 2011 Report Share Posted October 21, 2011 I think magic wand cutie marks are fine based on the fact Trixie has one in the show, determining such things are canon (even if they make little practical sense, but hey we have a train with room for a stream engine pulled by ponies). Since the cutie mark was changed, this is a moot point, just something for me to remember for the future.Do please change this one line though: "Insight was as ordinary as other young fillies his age." Should be colts instead of fillies. For Great Justice! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Skye Posted October 22, 2011 Report Share Posted October 22, 2011 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Xiee Posted October 24, 2011 Author Report Share Posted October 24, 2011 Thank you! Now off to try to find an RP >_< Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Starburst Posted October 28, 2011 Report Share Posted October 28, 2011 Finished with your commission. Just need payment and then we can go through the finishing touches. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Xiee Posted October 28, 2011 Author Report Share Posted October 28, 2011 Finished with your commission. Just need payment and then we can go through the finishing touches.Uh, please contact me through forum PM. Thanks. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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