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Calliope Steammusic (Ready)

Paaaad

By Paaaad
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Paaaad

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Roleplay Type: WOE

Name: Calliope Steammusic

Sex: Female

Age: Young Mare

Species: Unicorn

Eye colour: Heliotrope

#DF73FF

Coat: Lime

Mane/Tail: Blue with Sky Blue stripes, neatly combed

Physique: Very fat, with short, flat, ears and slightly protruding eyes.

Residence: Solstice Hights

Occupation: Calliope Player and Builder.

Cutie Mark: A steam whistle with a keyboard and wrench. Searching for a way to bring her two interests together, Calliope would often spend hours browsing the shelves of the Canterlot Library. Eventually, she came across one book on unusual instruments, which contained a description of the Calliope, as well as a picture of how they are put together. After several weeks of work, renewing the book twice, the instrument was done. With a fire going in the boiler, she tentatively started to play. Not only did everything work, but the instrument came easily to her. At the end of several songs, she got up to tell her parents, passing a mirror on the way... and discovering that she had earned her Cutie Mark!

History:

Calliope Steammusic was born as an only child in Garden Gait, living with her parents, Standard Gage and Woodwind, until adulthood. Her family was far from penniless but unable to afford a life in Canterlot proper. Her sire worked the line from Canterlot to Ponyville, allowing the family to visit the town every so often. She picked up an interest in steam power from her sire, and an interest in music from her dam, who was a small-time musician. After discovering her special talent, Calliope attended music and technical schools in Canterlot. She easily graduated from both. She remained with her parents for some time before she saved the cash for her own place in the hills behind Canterlot. Calliope now lives in a two-story brick house with a basement on the top of a hill located on the far side of the mountain from Ponyville. Her workshop is located in the basement, while the living quarters are on the top floor. She travels as often as her schedule and finances allow. She hopes to help bring the oft-neglected Calliope to the attention of the public.

Character Summary:

Calliope’s skills branch off of her talent with the eponymous instrument, meaning she has a reasonable grasp of all keyboard instruments, and posses a competency with boilers on par with a railway fireman. She dreams of their one-day being a Calliope in all the major population centers in Equestria (similar to pipe organs in real life churches), but realizes the impossibility of having one in every small hamlet. Her favorite food is waffles, and her favorite colour is blue. She also enjoys trains, and often watches them go by. She does not, however, enjoy excessively spicy foods, fighting, and those ever-annoying flies. She will defend herself if pressed however. Her hobbies include reading classic Sci-fi, and attending musical performances, as well as the aforementioned train spotting. Calliope avoids and tries to break up or prevent fights as often as possible, and also defers to those older than her or in a position of authority. She will, however, intervene if she knows that what they are doing is wrong or unsafe. When in a new location, she will often be looking for the best spot to put a Calliope, making her attention hard to get. She has a friendly personality overall, but dislikes those who cannot seem to stop talking long enough to have an actual conversation. When nervous, she tends to run a hoof through her mane. Although she is generally physically sound, her back sometimes becomes very stiff, making movement somewhat difficult on those days. Like nearly all ponies, Calliope has some fears. Chief among these are a slight case of claustrophobia and a healthy fear of boiler explosions, born of an understanding of the massive forces involved. As a result, she takes a second between each song and the next to check water and pressure levels.

(Appearance randomly generated using the Dwarf Fortress Pony Mod.)

Edited by Paaaad
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Jane 20% Cooler

Jane

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Hey there Paaaad. I'm Jane, and I'm the RPH who will be helping you with your application. :)

Firstly, these are our RP types:

:Celest:World of Equestria - Character application required!

Canterlot's canon-friendly roleplay, World of Equestria (or WoE/Mane RP) is a strict, structured game that mirrors the basic principles, rules, and continuity (canon) of My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic. Characters here must pass a review process by our volunteer staff to be deemed acceptable for play in this area. This game also features players that play Cast from FiM.

:Luna:Free for All and Crossovers - No application required.

Free for All is an area designated for any character, and anything you can dream. This is a good place to test new character concepts, story ideas, and to meet new and interesting players. Mature content must go in the 18+ sub-section.

​

Based on what I see here, it will take quite a bit of work for us to bring this application up to the level that is expected for WoE characters. If you are adamant that this character be for WoE, I will be happy to help to get it ready for that setting but it will need several changes. On the other hoof, if you would rather not making any changes to her, then you just need to change the "RP Type" to "Free For All" and you're all set to play her in that area of the board.

Also, I have been informed by some of my colleagues that this character is a reference to a Homestuck character. Unfortunately, we don't allow for crossover characters in WoE (that's why we have a Crossover section!) - while it may be okay for your character to be very loosely inspired by a character from another medium, if this is a direct reference it won't be permitted in WoE. My Homestuck knowledge is incredibly sparse, so I wouldn't know if this is a direct reference, but I will be having someone who is highly knowledgeable of the series looking this over before passing it along to the senior staff to be stamped should you choose to keep this a WoE application. Just something to keep in mind. :)

Do let me know here what you decide to do. :)

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Jane 20% Cooler

Jane

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That's a pretty hilarious coincidence, actually. :lol:

Okay, forgetting everything I wrote in that one paragraph, WoE or FFA my friend? :)

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Jane 20% Cooler

Jane

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That's quite alright - the first app is pretty much always the most difficult. I shall be here to help you all along the way! :)

So, firstly, while I appreciate that you've looked at Rarity's fabulous application form for suggestions of ideas for your character, the suggestions she gives you for what to include in various fields are just that - suggestions. You don't need to list each suggestion as though it was a field in and of itself. We want you to write in prose, as that's the style of writing you will presumably be adopting once you start RPing. All of the italicized headings can go so that you're just writing about your character in prose-style paragraphs. Here are a few apps for you to look at that are filled out the way we like them, in order to help give you an idea of how we want the application to be written.

Secondly, there should be no references to other characters from the show in your app, be it to compare or to say that your pony knew them. Relationships should be established organically within the RP area unless you have express permission from the other character's player. The reference to 'being born just after Twilight Sparkle' will need to go. If you're doing that to establish her age, simply saying she's a 'young mare' will suffice.

Thirdly, when writing your character's history, you really don't need to mention events that took place in the show unless they had a direct effect on who your character is. You will notice that none of the apps I linked you to earlier make any reference to the events of the show, though some of their players may decide to play their characters as though they were present for certain events. It might come up in RP that your character was in the crowd at Twilight Sparkle's coronation, but that doesn't add much to who she is as a character and doesn't need to be mentioned in the app.

Instead, try talking about her childhood in terms of, for example, how she felt about school, what sort of friends she made in school, how she felt about moving from the City of Canterlot to the outskirts, and maybe more about how she gets along with her parents. This section should be in prose as well.

That should be enough to get you started. :) You don't need to change the title of the thread every time you make changes - just having it as "Calliope Steammusic (Ready)" will suffice, and when you've made changes just post here to say they've been done. I am following this thread and I will get notifications when you post. If you have any further questions, again post them here and I will get to them as soon as I can. :)

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Jane 20% Cooler

Jane

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Much, much, much better! I'm really impressed. :) I'm sorry I forgot about this when writing my review earlier, but the physical description provided in the app is sufficient and the picture played a role in me thinking this was a reference. Could you remove the image, as it adds very little to the app overall?

Also, you've talked mostly about her interests in the character summary, and that's good, but could you add a little bit more to her personality, and especially to her mannerisms and how she behaves around other ponies? This is RP based on social interaction, and other players might be looking at this app to try to get an idea of who your pony is when RPing with you, so those details are rather important. :)

Her greatest fears are being buried alive and a Boiler Explosion- especially the latter, as these have the potential to destroy small houses.
Also, this particular line doesn't seem very WoE - considering her occupation a boiler explosion might be an acceptable fear, as long as she doesn't live in constant paranoia of one happening. But being buried alive seems a tad irrational for our light-hearted, slice of life game.

Just add a little bit more to her personality, and you should be right as rain! ;)

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Jane 20% Cooler

Jane

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Alright, just a few more changes to be made here. I'm sorry if I appear to be nitpicky about your character design, but it is important to us to keep World of Equestria balanced by making sure characters are designed to compliment the roleplay environment it represents:a light-hearted, slice-of-life-flavour Friendship is Magic roleplay. Remember this is strictly business, and this has nothing to do with you personally, or with our perception of your creativity. :)

She also an approximately Gamma class unicorn.

My apologies for not catching this earlier. We no longer use the UMAT to determine a unicorn's class; sorry if you found that in the old lore forum. I think her magic is adequately described in the rest of the application, so this can simply be removed.

Her greatest fears are Claustrophobia and a Boiler Explosion- especially the latter, as these have the potential to destroy small houses.

May I suggest a rewording to make this fit better with WoE?

"Like all ponies, Calliope has some fears; she is slightly claustrophobic. Futhermore, as a result of her work she is also extremely cautious around the boilers, as she knows how dangerous they could be and wouldn't want to be responsible for any accidents or mishaps."

We don't want any paranoia or any serious explosions in WoE. ;) Once again, sorry about all the changes, and thanks so much for your cooperation. :)

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RarityDash Alicorn

RarityDash

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Her hobbies include reading classic Sci-fi, like 20,000 Leagues Under the Sea...

In the WoE game, we prefer references to specific real world works not be included. Equestria is not Earth, so there is no guarantee that a work by the same name even exists there. If you can find a way to "ponify" the title of the work, and change it to something specific to Equestrai and pony related, it can remain. Otherwise, this should be removed.

Other than that, the application is looking pretty good. :)

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RarityDash Alicorn

RarityDash

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Hmm... Well, it's the right idea... but I'm not sure it makes sense as intended. Despite the name, for the World of Equestria RP, Equestria is more taken to be the name for a country or kingdom rather than the name of the actual world. As such, traveling to its center doesn't necessarily imply going underground or anything. :blush:

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RarityDash Alicorn

RarityDash

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Well, that's not really exactly established, I'm afraid. There's canon evidence that it's still called Earth, though I'm not sure the lore team really has a solid answer as to what we're calling the planet at this time. :blush:

You don't really need to include an example here. Alternatively, if you're really concerned about people not understanding what you mean by classic sci-fi and can't think of a way to ponify the name of one of the works you have in mind, you could instead try and make a play off the name of one of the notable authors in the genre, and change it into a pony-like name (i.e. "Jewels Firn" for Jules Verne). Really, it's up to you here. :)

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RarityDash Alicorn

RarityDash

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Perhaps, but there are some blanks the lore team would rather not fill in on our own if we don't have to. The name of the world is something probably better left to be decided eventually by canon if at all. But anyway....

As said before, this application was otherwise good, so with that removed...

AppApproved.png

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