The Friendship Sales Pitch (Closed: River, Phil, Eagle, Bellosh)

[Bellosh]

"Here, daddy, you can have mine. I know you like apple juice a lot more than I do anyway."

"Well then uhhh, thank you Diamond Tiar-"

"Oh, Ah'm sorry 'bout that! Here, let me as a good host show you tha hospitality yer deservin' of as a fine, upstandin' stallion of class! 'Ere, take mah juice!"

Filthy Rich blankly stared at Apple Bloom. Now why would a filly feel compelled to swap his apple juice cup (or rather, Diamond’s) with a different one? What game was Applejack’s little sister playing at? Hoping to unobtrusively gain a semblance answer, or maybe just wanting somepony else to know his thoughts, Mr. Rich whispered in the orange mare’s ear; “Apple Bloom sure is acting strange today, isn’t she?”

Yet there was still work to do. Pulling back to his seat, Filthy made an attempt to get back on-track; “Hmmm, I believe we left agreeing on using Red Delicious for the apple toppings.....”

[Hippo]

Applejack was still on the floor when whatever was going on top of the table was happening. Applejack heard Diamond Tiara offer her drink, and then Apple Bloom offered hers, as if a contest was in order for pleasing the stallion the most. Silly foal games. When Apple Bloom won the offering battle, and Applejack had returned to her seat, she looked across the ponies in wonder and suspicion on what was going on. The foals both had cheeky smiles on their faces. Smiles that Applejack could see through pretty well. And she could smell something. Applejack leaned over across the table getting a good look at their faces. "Are ya'll alright? There isn't... anything wrong is there?" Applejack raised a vicious eyebrow, her first concentration would be on Diamond Tiara, and then she could give Apple Bloom a test of honesty.

Applejack's mind raced on the thoughts. What was the big deal about trading drinks? It wasn't like there was something wrong with Diamond Tiara's dri- Thats it! Did Apple Bloom sabotage the drink? No! It's not possible. There's no way she would... And just then, Apple Bloom took a large sip of her drink. Applejack felt relieved. It was a silly suspicion after all. In fact, Applejack couldn't believe that Apple Bloom would conspire something like that. Maybe Apple Bloom was going to be useful for selling apples in this family after all. She's come a long way from aggravated selling in the streets of Ponyville. "Aw, thanks little sis. See, this is the kind of service and kindness ya always gonna get from Apple family ponies. Big and small." With that charming statement, Applejack took her hoof and ruffled Apple Bloom's mane down, causing it to fuzz up a little from it's original formal style she put it at since she first showed up at the sales pitch.

Since Apple Bloom was being such a good pony, Applejack decided to reward her with a little more participation. "Yes! Red Delicious apples it is! Ok. So now that we've agreed on what apple, and might ah say, what a find type of apple it is, let's talk about the shape and size of the product itself."

Applejack turned to Apple Bloom and slip her a piece of paper. "Alright Apple Bloom, help me out here. Take this here pencil and write a list of all the things we're going to do to these apples to sell."

Applejack turned back to Filthy. "Because after all, we're not actually providing apples. We're providing the apple topping, which should probably not shaped like an apple, if I understand how pizza toppings work." Applejack smirked in confidence. Even if this wasn't her forte, she was going to pretend that it was. "We can slice them for you. We have plenty of apple corers and have an assembly skill to cut the apples in wedge slices. Or if you're prefer to slice them in cross sections, we can do that too! Just tell us how thin you want 'em! I would recommend the wedges, because they tend to use a better portion of the apple, and some of the end slices of a cross section would not be very large. And after we slice them, we can also package them for you. We can do so in proportion bags that will make it easy on whoever makes the pie."

"You gettin' all of this, Apple Bloom?"

"How does that sound, Mr. Rich? Tell me what you need in terms of product shape. I think you'll find we can shape our apples in more ways that you can count. And I bet you can count really high?" Applejack of course alluding to her imaging Filthy being the kind of pony who spends half his days counting bit coins.

​

[RarityDash]

Diamond read the note and continued to smirk. Apple Bloom could smile and write whatever she wanted to. It didn't change the fact that Diamond had won. Whatever she had put in that drink, Apple Bloom had drunk a big gulp of it. Her face didn't change so noticeably for the taste either which made Diamond more curious as to what the added ingredient was. If it wasn't something to throw off the flavor, she supposed it could only logically be something that would have an internal effect. If so, Apple Bloom had a stroke of cruelty to her. The thought made Diamond giggle a little in delight. She quickly grabbed her pen and wrote a new note.

Yes. I'm sure only good times are in store for your stomach!

​

She left it at that, giggled and then turned back toward the adults.

​

"Apples apples apples apples apples apples apples apples apples apples."

This was pretty much all Diamond Tiara heard at least when she looked toward Applejack. What she could discern, however, was that Apple Bloom had just been given the task by her sister to write down all of the tedious apple drivel. This was perfect. Whatever unpleasantness Apple Bloom had ingested, Diamond was pretty sure the last thing she'd want was to be hit with a bunch of words she needed to record for her sister. Diamond immediately considered how to exploit this and make Apple Bloom's time transcribing the meeting last as long as possible. As much as she hated extending all the tedious apple talk, Diamond felt a need to keep it going. Besides, it was an opportunity to maybe make her father proud at the same time.

"Ooh, we could have a whole product line worth of varieties, Daddy" she said, nodding. "For pizza you'd want it thin as possible so that it wouldn't make the crust soggy, but for other purposes we could have different sizes and cuts available. Thick cut wedges for easy snacking, Fine diced for use in pastries. We could even experiment with different varieties of spices!" she added, hoping to prolong the conversation.

​

[SteelEagle]

It felt like a rolling thunderstorm had started to camp out in her insides, rocking and rolling through her stomach, sending whatever it was that made the medicine so terrible through her like a lightning strike. Uggh, just another notch on the belt of the great mistakes she had made in often times miserable life. What was it about Diamond Tiara that she could decipher insidious plans so fast and turn them around just as quickly on the intended mischief maker? It would be something admirable about her intelligence if it wasn't so detestable and annoying. Uggh. Uggh. Why'd she have to be so bad? That message was the icing on the cake. She knew the score. She knew what was up. It was like she lived in Apple Bloom's mind and plucked the strings of a cruel fate in personal ways. Apple Bloom had to steel herself through the knowledge that she had done the best she could by Filthy at least, even if it was her fault to begin with.

The cruelty of fate continued as finally the ponies involved got into the nitty gritty of the itty bity bits that would make up the majority of what went into the new pizzas. It was a fascinating conversation! Her sister spoke at length and breadth about what would work on the pizza and Apple Bloom could only agree with her as she wrote as fast as she could. It was something to distract her from the growing explosion inside. As fun as the conversation was, it was equaled by the pressure that was building. She wanted more than anything to relieve it but the conversation wouldn't end and she couldn't break her even and normal facade and just run out. She had to stay and write everything down.

"Yes, ma'am," Apple Bloom replied swiftly to her sister, still writing down. And then Diamond joined in an exacerbated the issue. Likely on purpose, too. Her cruelty knew no bounds or laws or manners.

The pressure was now intense but she wore a mask as a cover and tried to not not show it. She gulped and her entire lower half was rigid, but she couldn't let it show. Her tail wagged behind her in anxiety a little though it could be passed off as excitement at the discussion. In a ny manner, she wrote down what Diamond started to say. She wouldn't be able to hold her position much longer. More importantly, she knew the hierarchy here. If she asked Applejack to leave before Diamond then Diamond would stop her from leaving. The only way she could go was to get that evil little filly's permission first. Uggh. Uggh. Uggh. In between writing down everything that was being said, Apple Bloom wrote on their piece of paper and pushed it back with authority towards her foe:

Okay, you won this round. I really gotta go. You and I both know you'd just stop me from going if I got up or asked my sister first, so I'll ask you. Can I go to the bathroom? I hate you for making me know I have to ask this.

[Bellosh]

".....How does that sound, Mr. Rich? Tell me what you need in terms of product shape. I think you'll find we can shape our apples in more ways that you can count. And I bet you can count really high?"

"Ooh, we could have a whole product line worth of varieties, Daddy. For pizza you'd want it thin as possible so that it wouldn't make the crust soggy, but for other purposes we could have different sizes and cuts available. Thick cut wedges for easy snacking, Fine diced for use in pastries. We could even experiment with different varieties of spices!"

Why bother to learn about the intricacies of apples yourself when the best farming family in Ponyville can do it for you? Unable to detect any doubt in Applejack’s voice, Filthy Rich readily took her advice at face value without a second. And if she was in fact making bogus claims... at least the mare mastered the art of salesmareship. If there was one skill that Mr. Rich believed everypony should learn, it was how to market one’s products or services. The pony who successfully sells his or her value is an equine able to freely pursue their destiny in life.

And in a nice turn of events, Diamond Tiara at last got off her high horse and started treating apples with respect. Truthfully, Filthy Rich did not want to leave Sweet Apple Acres ordering far more product than originally planned for. If a storeowner wasn’t careful discriminating in what items to stock, they could end up with surplus product, resulting in money wasted. However, rather than outright dismiss his daughter’s suggestions as off point to the current matter, Filthy decided on creating a moment to educate the little filly.

“Hmmm, that might be an idea worth looking into one day Diamond,” Filthy mused passionately, increasingly making foreleg gestures the further he delved into the lecture. “You always have to consider though the likelihood that a new product line will be embraced by your customers. For example, fine-diced apple slices might not sell because those pastry makers already making everything else from scratch won’t see value in pre-sliced ingredients. On the other hoof, ponies who find it too bothersome to cut up apples or deal with the cores could find great value in something already sliced up for them. So logically, the smart business pony, faced with a limited selection of experimental items to stock, will choose the product with better value to your overall shopper base. That is one of the keys of maintaining profitability.”

Mr. Rich energetically turned towards Apple Bloom, now tasked with writing meeting notes; “I hope you got all of that lil’ missy. Good advice should always be written down when the opportunity presents itself.” Speaking of, maybe the stallion should get around to writing a self-help book geared at aspiring merchants. For now though, he brought his attention back to Applejack; “Haha, sorry for getting off-track there. Anyway, I think wedges will do nicely for our apple toppings.” If everything else in this business meeting flowed smoothly from this point onward, Filthy can get back to counting bit coins in no time.

[Hippo]

Applejack wasn't sure what had gotten into the younger ponies. One minute they seemed troubled, and then the next it was like apples was the greatest thing. And while Applejack can never appreciate enough another pony's love of apples, she did find Diamond Tiara's change of heart rather peculiar. But she decided to use it to her advantage. "Those are all great ideas! You gettin' all o' this, Apple Bloom?" Applejack looked over at her sister, who seemed to start sweatin'. She didn't figure penmareship was a problem for the filly, but before she could question, Filthy spoke up and discouraged any extra buying of apple product that didn't associate with the pizza topping he came for.

"Right." Applejack knew Filthy was a pretty straight shooter. He spent his entire life never buying too much. In fact, often he never bought enough, which is why he could save up to his self-sustaining wealth. And with all the talk of money and counting bits, Applejack had always assumed the Apple family's net worth far exceeded the faithful entrepreneurship of the Rich's family estate and property, but she would never mention that. "Well then. Apple Bloom, write these figures down. I'll propose a new contract in which we provide a bushel of apples ever week, slice them ourselves, and deliver them every Monday morning for the next year. So for fifty-two bushels, I'll give you the special price of only seven bits a bushel. And these apples will stay fresh all week, provided you store them correctly. As always, we stand by our product. Don't we sis?"

"Sis?"

​

[RarityDash]

“Hmmm, that might be an idea worth looking into one day Diamond, You always have to consider though the likelihood that a new product line will be embraced by your customers. For example, fine-diced apple slices might not sell because those pastry makers already making everything else from scratch won’t see value in pre-sliced ingredients. On the other hoof, ponies who find it too bothersome to cut up apples or deal with the cores could find great value in something already sliced up for them. So logically, the smart business pony, faced with a limited selection of experimental items to stock, will choose the product with better value to your overall shopper base. That is one of the keys of maintaining profitability.”

"Of course, Daddy," Diamond said, nodding. "No one truly needs pre-sliced apples, but isn't business sometimes trying to figure out how to sell ponies things they don't need? If we came up with eye-catching packaging and marketed it cleverly, we could then get ponies to think that they need a product they might not actually need. Not everyone who is going to be making pastry, for instance, is going to be an experienced baker. Prepackaged ingredients could encourage ponies to try baking who wouldn't otherwise "

Diamond wasn't entirely sure of her future, but she hadn't entirely ruled out the possibility of just following her father into business. She tended to pay attention to that stuff where she could and try to understand it. As she saw it, her father was very shrewd with his business policies, but she'd maybe be even more aggressive in trying to maximize the bits made.

​

"Those are all great ideas! You gettin' all o' this, Apple Bloom?... Sis?"

As Applejack began to speak, Diamond grabbed at her little sister's note and read it over. So that was it, huh? Oh, Apple Bloom, how devious you could be. She smiled with satisfaction and nodded. She was polite enough to ask for permission though and Diamond didn't want things to get too uncomfortably messy. She was more than happy to allow her dear friend the relief she needed.

"Oh, my, Apple Bloom, is everything okay? You don't look well at all," she said suddenly. "If you need to excuse yourself for a while, I would be happy to take over writing duties in the meantime," she said in a sugary kind voice.

​

[SteelEagle]

“Hmmm, that might be an idea worth looking into one day Diamond. You always have to consider though the likelihood that a new product line will be embraced by your customers. For example, fine-diced apple slices might not sell because those pastry makers already making everything else from scratch won’t see value in pre-sliced ingredients. On the other hoof, ponies who find it too bothersome to cut up apples or deal with the cores could find great value in something already sliced up for them. So logically, the smart business pony, faced with a limited selection of experimental items to stock, will choose the product with better value to your overall shopper base.That is one of the keys of maintaining profitability. I hope you got all of that lil’ missy. Good advice should always be written down when the opportunity presents itself. Haha, sorry for getting off-track there. Anyway, I think wedges will do nicely for our apple toppings.”

Apple Bloom had never really dealt with Filthy rich. After all, he was a fancy schamncy business owner and she was a little farm filly. All she was to him, she was sure, was a little worker bee. No problem with that- she liked work and she liked bees so being a worker bee was the bee's knees, to be catchy. But it never hurt to get somepony who knew everything about business in your house spouting off on some form of great advice, which is what he did. She wrote it all down with attention and verve, focusing on her own problems only as much as it took to not cause a scene. She wanted nothing ore than to take care of this problem but as long as she was not able to it behooved her to try and keep up appearances. She kept up with him as he spoke, plastering on a fake smile at the end. If nothing else, that tpold him she was aware. Uggh, uggh, uggh, her plan was stupid. Note to self: Don't mess with Tiara like this again. Only she could mess with ponies in sch a way and get away with it.

"Those are all great ideas! You gettin' all o' this, Apple Bloom?"

"Right. Well then. Apple Bloom, write these figures down. I'll propose a new contract in which we provide a bushel of apples ever week, slice them ourselves, and deliver them every Monday morning for the next year. So for fifty-two bushels, I'll give you the special price of only seven bits a bushel. And these apples will stay fresh all week, provided you store them correctly. As always, we stand by our product. “

Apple Bloom nodded once and then twice first to let her sister know she was getting all of it and then to let her know she was going to write the proposal down. Having hard numbers and figures and a contract to talk about and think about made it a whole lot easier to handle. Well, that was a bit of a lie. It wasn't easy to handle at all. This was a singularly awful experience. Nopony who was anypony could handle this for long. It felt like her stomach was tied up in knots and a freight train moving at high speeds had been stopped at the border by a barrier, but it wasn't stopping. Her entire lower half felt like a rock save for her tail which swayed increasingly desperately. She took a deep breath and continued writing. Whatever Applejack was saying was going down on the paper, even if it wasn't related.

“Don't we sis? Sis?"

Including that. It took Apple Bloom a second for her to realize she had to speak. She looked up to her sister and smiled and nodded. Yep, everything was fine. She felt like if she spoke she would squeak and squawk. Nope, silent is as silent does.

"Of course, Daddy. No one truly needs pre-sliced apples, but isn't business sometimes trying to figure out how to sell ponies things they don't need? If we came up with eye-catching packaging and marketed it cleverly, we could then get ponies to think that they need a product they might not actually need. Not everyone who is going to be making pastry, for instance, is going to be an experienced baker. Prepackaged ingredients could encourage ponies to try baking who wouldn't otherwise "

Whatever, Tiara. She knew what she was doing and so did Apple Bloom. The words went down mechanically as Apple Bloom envisioned pushing Tiara into the icy waters of the north.

"Oh, my, Apple Bloom, is everything okay? You don't look well at all. If you need to excuse yourself for a while, I would be happy to take over writing duties in the meantime,"

She responded fast. “Oh, something is wrong? Ah'm, uhh, fine. But now thatcha mention it, Ah could use the bathroom! Haha. Applejack, Ah'll be right back,” Apple Bloom responded swiftly, pushing her chair out and trotting away under control with her tail tucked firmly behind her. When she was out of sight, she booked it.

[Bellosh]

".....isn't business sometimes trying to figure out how to sell ponies things they don't need?"

Filthy Rich wouldn’t have put it quite like that, but boy did Diamond Tiara have a good point. Even though Barnyard Bargains tended to stock items that could be considered essential, Mr. Rich wouldn’t have lasted nearly as long in business if he had not figured out how to convince ponies to buy more than they actually needed. So maybe this one suggestion of Diamond’s shouldn’t be that easily brushed off, especially if.....

“Very well then Diamond Tiara,” the smirking father issued a challenge; “You come up with a packaging concept and a viable marketing plan for your product idea, and I might consider lending you start-up money so that you yourself can put your theory to the test. Ha ha, you think you’re up to the challenge?” Granted, there was a high possibility that Diamond would simply get bored midway through the project, but just maybe she’ll find the art of business compelling enough to stick through to the end.

As for Applejack’s proposal, Filthy Rich found nothing unfair with her terms and prices. If the stallion remembered right, the Apple family marked down their prices for unsliced apple bushels to five bits each during that kissing booth promotion of theirs. It was thus reasonable that an extra two bits would be added on to make up for the increased labor involved in preparing apple slices.

An unforeseen awkward delay briefly ensured when Apple Bloom made an emergency dash to the bathroom, but with Diamond Tiara taking up note-writing duties, Filthy spoke up once more; “I approve of those terms. I just like to specify that apple slice deliveries should not commence until Barnyard Bargains finishes adding in the food-court. I estimate that we’re a month away from debuting it, so I just want to make sure in the meantime, that you don’t start deliveries too early. Gotta’ make sure no slice goes to waste, I say.”

[Hippo]

"Not a problem!" Applejack said loudly. "That actually works to our benefit anyway. Without having to deliver early, I wont have to delay less important trade packs to local areas around Equestria and the businesses around town that also share a slice of our orchard's apples. And in the meantime, we can prepare a nice section of the farm that will produce your fine apples so we can arrange them neatly for harvesting the day before you finish the renovations. Its a win-win situation!"

Just then, Apple Bloom finally responded with a plea for a bathroom break. Applejack found it odd. She knew Apple Bloom was really excited about this moment to be part of the sales pitch, and with her dressed up for the occasion, even, she knew that she must have taken care of the vital duties in the filly's room less than an hour from the meeting time. And without thinking, it brought Applejack a must explain towards the two guests. "Heh heh, little sis has to take a trip to the fillies room. Sure is odd, I could have sworn she went before the meeting." For some reason, Applejack seemed to have no shame talking about her little sister. It was like her joy to love her sister collided with her resistance to share private information no one outside the family had business knowing. But here it was. "I remember one time, when she was little, she told me she went to the bathroom when we were potty training her, but she lied, and wouldn't you know it, she went all over the kitchen floor. You should have seen the look on Winona's face!" No shame.

Diamond Tiara seemed awfully confident at this point in the meeting. It almost seemed like she was leading her father to the final deal. But Applejack knew better than that. Filthy got what he wanted, and the only way Diamond would lead him to that is if she in fact wanted the same thing. Applejack passed the notes to Diamond. "Here, go ahead and write all the stuff we just said after Apple Bloom had to be excused."

"So now that we have set a price, let's talk about time. If y'all are wanting to do this long term, I can possibly get you a free first week of deliveries for a year commitment However, if you're wanting to start out slow, I would be willing to postpone such a deal for a future contract. What kind of commitment are you looking for at this point?" This time, Applejack decided to look at Diamond Tiara while she asked the question. Although Filthy was free to intercept at any point, she decided to test the filly at her decision and marketing.

​

[RarityDash]

“Very well then Diamond Tiara, You come up with a packaging concept and a viable marketing plan for your product idea, and I might consider lending you start-up money so that you yourself can put your theory to the test. Ha ha, you think you’re up to the challenge?”

Diamond was somewhat surprised by her father's reaction. She was mostly talking just to give Apple Bloom a hard time after all. She wasn't actually trying to get anywhere by presenting these ideas she had. Her father seemed surprisingly supportive of what she had said though and was encouraging her. He was likely pleased to see her seemingly interested in business. She wasn't sure what to think about it. Honestly, she wasn't sure being a bussinessmare was exactly her destiny... but at the same time, if she did actually come up with something.. she could make her father proud and if she was successful perhaps even find a path to more admiration. On the other hand, it did seem like a lot of effort to make the idea a reality.

"You really think it's a good idea, Daddy?" Diamond said, titling her head. "Well, I suppose I could give it some more thought then," she said nodding.

​

“Oh, something is wrong? Ah'm, uhh, fine. But now thatcha mention it, Ah could use the bathroom! Haha. Applejack, Ah'll be right back,”

And with that, the poor tortured filly went running off to relieve herself. Diamond smirked and grabbed for her little notepad to take the notes and gave a little hum. Oh how she loved winning. There was just something so satisfying in the victory.

​

"I remember one time, when she was little, she told me she went to the bathroom when we were potty training her, but she lied, and wouldn't you know it, she went all over the kitchen floor. You should have seen the look on Winona's face!"

Diamond's expression remained level as Apple Bloom's sister reacted to her sudden dash off the scene. She laughed like mad, but on the inside. The satisfaction here was simply in knowing... and in writing the words of Applejack's little storing in the notes right under everything else. What was it with Apple Bloom's relatives? Sure, Diamond's dad could on occasion force her to do something mildly embarrassing, but between this story and practically everything that came from Apple Bloom's kooky old grandmother, Apple Bloom sure seemed to have it rough. It made it all too easy for her.

​

“I approve of those terms. I just like to specify that apple slice deliveries should not commence until Barnyard Bargains finishes adding in the food-court. I estimate that we’re a month away from debuting it, so I just want to make sure in the meantime, that you don’t start deliveries too early. Gotta’ make sure no slice goes to waste, I say.”

"Here, go ahead and write all the stuff we just said after Apple Bloom had to be excused.So now that we have set a price, let's talk about time. If y'all are wanting to do this long term, I can possibly get you a free first week of deliveries for a year commitment However, if you're wanting to start out slow, I would be willing to postpone such a deal for a future contract. What kind of commitment are you looking for at this point?"

As if Applejack actually had to tell her to do it. Apple Bloom's embarrassing accident was jotted onto the page right above Diamond's father's words before Applejack said the phrase. Diamond smiled and nodded when Applejack told her to write it all all the same. As she then continued, Diamond continued to write the notes. She was surprised when Applejack looked her way then at the final question. It was interesting, but she supposed it presented another opportunity to shine in front of her father. She glanced up at him and nodded.

"Well, a long term contract would probably be best in this case, right dad?" she said. "Sure, there's risk if the product isn't as successful as we think it is... but it's apples we're talking about. Their easy to repackage or re-purpose if we need to, and there isn't a question of competition since if we bought from any other orchard, we'd need to pay more to get them shipped to us on a train..."

She gave a final nod, convinced her logic was on point. "So I don't really see cause to fear commitment in this case. If the price is right, we should secure the longest term deal we can."

​

[Bellosh]

As a pony who thought it important to always speak well of one’s family whenever possible, Filthy Rich wasn’t quite comfortable hearing Applejack’s anecdote about an ancient potty accident of Apple Bloom’s. Sure, children sometimes needed to be publicly chastised by their parents when the situation calls for it, and maybe just once in a while, it was okay to make private gripes amongst fellow adults who’ve also undertaken the rewarding challenges of parent. But Filthy never quite understood the impulse to relate a son or daughter’s embarrassing mishaps for entertainment value.

On to more productive matters, Applejack unexpectedly gave Diamond Tiara a chance to test out her negotiating skills. Since most of the other vital details had already been agreed upon by now, Mr. Rich thought that it was a safe opportunity for his filly to speak up, since there wasn’t much risk of error at this time. So after receiving an approving nod from her father, Diamond indeed fielded the question for Team Barnyard Bargains. As always, her mind was as sharp as a razor. Not many kids period were able to understand and participate in a contract negotiation on Diamond’s level. She still had much to learn of course, but the little filly fortunately had the talent to do so (if not necessarily the drive to do so).

Mr. Rich let his approval shine forth with a smile. “Diamond Tiara’s right,” the stallion told Applejack; “A long term contract will suit our needs just fine.”

[Hippo]

Having accepted the projection of the current offer so easily, Applejack decided to up the ante. "One year no problem huh? How about five years then? Also, in addition to the contract length and minimum sales at the price we agree, we do have some other suggestions we would like honored in the contract." Applejack put on her rare reading glasses and started flipping through an already made contract draft. "We will need our name attached to every single apple product you sell with the proper logo and spelling. Any promotional content you produce, either in print or radio is to be screened and approved by either Big Macintosh or I and cannot be distributed without the consent of both parties. All apple competitor companies included in the selling of the product makes the contract void. If the buyer refuses to purchase the minimum order agreed every Wednesday before dusk, excluding holidays and winter wrap up day, the contract must be revised with no less than 30 days prior to the first order under the new agreement, orders must be made in advanced, no credit, and deliveries must be credited with a fee by the wieght of the order based on legal scales distributed and to be determined by the city of Ponyville, yada yada, Oh! And a cancelation of the agreement before its end period will result in a broken contract and the seller is compensated with 65% of the total minimum sales per week of all remaining weeks left in the contract period."

Applejack set her glasses down and stared at Diamond Tiara with a smile. The demand was intended to be long-winded and outrageous. But she was curious to see if the little pink foal would even flinch at it. Applejack wished her sister was here. She would know right away that this was not the norm.

​

[RarityDash]

"One year no problem huh? How about five years then? Also, in addition to the contract length and minimum sales at the price we agree, we do have some other suggestions we would like honored in the contract."

Diamond was surprised by the suggestion. Was this meant to test her? She glanced at her father for a moment before then giving a sigh. "Well, we can always count on the popularity of apples, I think. Five years is an awful long time for any contract to last though, isn't it, Daddy?" She looked up at her father once more, looking for some recognition. "Things can change any number of ways, and it wouldn't be a good thing for us to be locked into a deal when our needs may change. Five years is too long. With something as sure as this though, maybe we could talk about stretching it to two years though?"

As Applejack proceeded to continue listing out terms for the deal, Diamond became even more convinced she was being tested by the apple farmer. Adults were so obvious sometimes. She'd seen less obvious tests from Miss Cheerilee herself on test taking day. Pfft. Did Applejack not realize that figuring out silly tests were her speciality? Diamond did her best to listen to the details and write them down. Listening alone wasn't enough though. She needed to make it clear that she wasn't being overwhelmed and had her information straight.

Once Applejack had finished, she lifted the notebook and began to read the points she had made. "You're a shrewder business pony than I would have guessed, Miss Applejack!" she said with clear respect. "Let me see if I got this straight: The Sweet Apple Acres logo goes on everything--that's good. it's a recognizable, well loved brand here in Ponyville; good for sales, though we'll need to have a say in the appearance of the logo if it's going on our products. You want final consent on our advertising. I understand wanting to protect your image; if my name was on a product, I'd be pretty particular about how it was advertised too and I don't think it would be so hard to run things by you or your brother. No competitor products sold in your name or the deal is void; that's entirely understandable, but I hope you don't think Daddy would actually sell someone else's apples under the Sweet Apple Acres brand."

She looked down at her notebook and then at her dad and Applejack. "With the fourth point, I think I sort of got a lost. What is the legal meaning of 'yada yada'? Also, when you say holidays, do you mean only nationally recognized Equestrian holidays, or any day recognized as such by the City of Ponyville? Furthermore, are there exceptions in place for extenuating circumstances, such as emergencies and natural disasters? Additionally, it begs the question of the case that the seller is not able to provide their end of an order. If there is a shortage of apples due to parasite infestation, unexpected disaster or something else unforeseen what insurances can we get?" Diamond nodded a moment before continuing. "As for the final point, I'm not sure I understand. You want 65% of the sales of what? In the event that the contract was broken, we would most likely not continue to stock the product once the remaining stock sold. You can't mean 65% of our total sales across product lines? That hardly seems justified. Wouldn't it be more reasonable to just set a contract termination fee, equal roughly to the cost of the minimum order of apples for each week remaining?"

Diamond again looked toward her father. "Though I'm sure Daddy has a better idea than me what would make for a reasonable long term contract than I do," she said, smiling her fake smile.

​

[SteelEagle]

Apple Bloom did not have a good time at all. Her plan had backfired and then she had backfired. Everything was terrible. Life was an uneven mishmash of the bad ponies getting what they wanted and the good ponies not getting what they had deserved, and the little fillies like Apple Bloom that existed mostly in the latter but dabbled in the former got none of either. She was paying the price of the one instance of poor manners she had shown a guest in the past...forever and a half. Apple ancestors must be a bit peeved at her this night. She deserved this. She was supposed to be kind, courteous, and above all, hospitable to guests. It didn't matter who the guest was or what the situation was. No leeway for the rude and the crude. But gosh, what would she do once she went back downstairs? She couldn't stand Tiara. Well, mostly. She- uggh. Why was Tiara in Apple Bloom's life? Everything involving that little terror was trouble. It made Apple Bloom question the justice of her Equestrian culture if a pony like Tiara wasn't due for some good old fashioned pain and suffering.

Pain and suffering, sorta like what she was listening to in the meeting down below. The kitchen echoed well and the house as a whole wasn't the greatest at sound insulation, allowing for it to travel, Apple Bloom listened intently. Applejack was doing well and all and Filthy was being a little too quiet. It was Tiara who was showing off her intelligence, which surprised even Apple Bloom a bit. She was always a smart cookie but it was a poisoned one. If she turned her smarts to even a modicrum of good for the shortest of moments she could do well by a lot of ponies in the world. Too bad she was more likely to anger somepony and wind up on the short end of the luck stick someday than befriend the right ponies at the right time. Still, she was doing rather well for a pony who didn't seem all that interested in business. She really was Filthy's daughter. Sadly for her, Apple Bloom was paying attention even as she left the bathroom and silently made her way downstairs. Knowing she had a little edge this time gave Apple Bloom the confidence to be assertive, which was the proper way to submit the rich filly.

Apple Bloom entered the kitchen as Tiara finished, trotting delightfully to her seat and smiling across the way.

“Well, y'all are pretty good and straight on a few points, but as mah sister knows, we need ta plan out our orchard a few years in advance. It makes sense that y'all'd want ta ensure yer not overpaying for declinin' demand but demand is still growin' steadily and if we end up with a surplus harvest then that drives down the price of apples locally. That'd hurt prices of other fruits and veggies by artifically creatin' a timed limited rush of demand, which would roll back to y'all eventually anyway. Five years may be a bit rosie but anythin' less than three is really hard ta plan well, ain't that right Applejack?” Apple Bloom offered up before fully sitting down and making herself comfortable. She had studied Sweet Apple Acres' rotations and schedules extensively. It came in powerfully there.

“Logo wise, no real need ta worry about how it'll look. Y'all've carried Sweet Apple Acres products before and unless y'all have any complains on the design lets not waste anypony's time and yer money on a redesign. If it ain't broke don't fix it, and nothin' we've done together has been broken yet!” She ended cheerfully, hoping to let Tiara know that Apple Bloom had yet to be bowed. “And Ah don't think we should be worryin' about whether or not y'all decide to sell other apple products besides our own. Applejack, y'all know that there ain't nopony within a hundred miles that produces apples in the quality or quantity we do and beyond that the only comparable ones are from other Apple family or the orchards near Seaddle. And transportation costs are so high going to an' fro that one bushel of Sweet Apple Acres apples would make more profit than ten of theirs, even after they complete the airship lanes. So if Barnyard Bargains wants ta sell somepony else's apples, Ah say bring it on- something must be so special 'bout em that their willing to risk a lot of profit, so we would step up our game to get even better!” Apple Bloom stated enthusiastically.

On the face it seemed a bit silly to bring up the prospect of allowing opposing sales, but the reasoning was obvious. It put the onus on Barnyard Bargains to be aggressive in seeking out new opportunities which simply did not exist, making Sweet Apple Acres' leverage greater as it became more and more obvious tha they really were the only option available. It wouldn't help much this negotiation but it would pay dividends in the next few negotiations, and eventually if anypony anywhere did start to get a really nice operation up and running, they'd have enough cache and clout to demand an ironclad agreement THEN.

“As fer yadda yadda, just skipping the legal mumbo jumbo that we don't really need to hash out concerning Ponyville weight standard, ain't that right Applejack? Ah mean we could go into the details but that'd be something that a quick consulting of city farmin' ordnances would provide the answer for. Same for holidays- Ponyville City approved holidays since those are the holidays covered under the provider's- err, our- land. As for yer assurances- Sweet Apple Acres produces a lot of apples, to be sure, and has many places it sends its apples too. Ah think that with this contract being juicy enough it would warrant it being the primary focus of our harvestin' efforts, so any sort of minor or mild infestation or disaster would be unlikely ta hamper our business together. Of course if a major disaster strikes we're all up the creek without a paddle! Ah'd propose that in the event we are unable ta prove tha apples y'all need, this agreement should provide for both parties.

So if the fault is on our end Ah think minimum weekly amounts to us until we can recover and we reimburse you for shipping once we're back. On the flip side, if Barnyard Bargains breaks the agreement, it should pay the maximum weekly payment as a one-time termination fee. That would allow us to eat the costs of what amounts to destroying a portion of our yield that year to make sure prices remain stable across the board, ensuring y'all aren't hurt long term by the changing costs of fruits and veggies. We all know that Sweet Apple Acres and Barnyard Bargains aren't going anywhwre and are stronger together than not. We need you, you need us. Ah think that seems fair, dont'cha think Mister Rich?” Apple Bloom offered up to the businesspony of businessponies at the table. And hopefully countering Tiara left that little firecracker steaming.

[Bellosh]

OOC: Long dialogue chunks. My arch-nemesis.

Strange; this was supposed to be only a routine contract negotiation to obtain ingredients for an experimental food court product. Yet a train must have derailed somewhere in Applejack’s mind, because all of a sudden she started playing an uncharacteristic game of hardball. Either that, or Applejack was just trying to see what Diamond Tiara was made of. Most likely the latter, as Filthy Rich couldn’t imagine Applejack displaying genuine ignorance of several important aspects of the retail business.

Not sure how earnestly to treat this unexpected situation, Filthy Rich let his daughter do her own thing, and the father nodded as needed to give the little one encouragement. Diamond Tiara showed her quality by not blindly agreeing to everything Applejack requested, clearly articulating an understanding of negotiation far above the level of the average school child. Being an adult though, Mr. Rich would eventually have to step in and finalize the contract details, but that could wait until after Diamond’s test came to an end.

At least, that was the stallion’s hope. Nopony however seemed to have passed this memo along to Apple Bloom, freshly returned from the bathroom. Evidently, the apple filly also felt the need to prove herself by energetically reaffirming her older sister’s terms, regardless of how serious they actually were or not. Filthy Rich couldn’t just ask the filly to be excused from the table so that the grown-ups could finish talking in peace; that might have very well turned the mood much more sour. Instead, Mr. Rich would have to deal with the wildcard apple pony the hard way.

“First off lil’ missy,” Filthy started on an apologetic note; “Remember that these apple slices we’re ordering are for a trial product. For a situation like this, it’s simply unheard of in Equestria to have a contract that lasts longer than two years. To tell ya’ the truth, I was quite fine with the one year commitment that your sister Applejack first proposed, at least for this initial order. If this food court idea goes well with my customers, then I’ll be happy to reconsider a longer term deal.”

Ignoring the issues around competing orchards and product packaging (which to Filthy Rich were all moot points or irrelevant to the current issue anyway), the stallion deemed it important though to give some thought to the termination clause. As Diamond Tiara correctly pointed out earlier, Applejack’s unconvincing test proposal was too vague and nonsensical. Apple Bloom here sounded like she was bargaining in good faith, so Filthy replied in kind; “Hmmm… Diamond Tiara and I can agree that Barnyard Bargains should pay a termination fee based on the remaining weeks that haven’t been paid for, and that Sweet Apple Acres will reimburse us for any apple slices that can’t be delivered at or around the time of purchase due to reasons such as those that, haha, these bright two fillies have already brought up. Does that sound fair to you, Applejack?”

[Hippo]

It was business time. Conversations like this tickled Applejack in a way that nothing else could. And this time, she got to share it with her sister. At first, she felt Apple Bloom was unaware of all the things that were going on, but blessed by the apples, Apple Bloom came out of the kitchen looked fit and better than ever and had listened to most of what Diamond Tiara had stated. Applejack was impressed with Diamond Tiara, she certainly was a clever girl. Althougth, Applejack was more impressed with Apple Bloom's throw back negotiation, even though Applejack was more familiar with the spontaneous smarts that often radiated from the yellow filly's mind. She was the smartest pony on the farm in most ways.

Apple Bloom was hardly pitching a perfect game though, but the spirit of the negotiation was all that mattered to Applejack. She knew that if worse comes to worse, she and Filthy could finish the negotiation and sign on an agreement that often mimicked several other orders this business pony had with her several times a year. There was no pressure really. But while the stakes appeared high, Applejack figured she might as well turn it into a lesson, and help teach Apple Bloom how to outdo her opponent, in the most friendly business sense possible. After all, we're all friends here right?

Applejack nodded in agreement as Apple Bloom spoke, even when she said something that was not completely fair. Should her attempt to sharpen Diamond's blade continue she should probably act as if everything the yellow filly said was normal. Any major correction to Apple Blood's suggestions would be dealt with in private. "Yes, very good, Apple Bloom. I agree. We need to be able plan ahead as a farm. Several of the crops we are harvesting today is the result of pricing and planning for deliveries several seasons ago. We make overhead supply in case of on the fly circumstances. Should this product placement be emphasized more, we will need a fuller contract, even if we have the best darn apples any pony has every eaten."

Filthy responded with a question for a trial period. Applejack withdrew back to that notion, realizing that this was not yet to be a continuing product. "OK. How about this. Let's make the contract guaranteed for one year, but optioned for three years. Should the product continue as normal after a year, the contract can continue as normal. But both parties have the option to discontinue the contract after the first year. Any revisions can be made then to the contract we are making now. How does that sound? And yes, that termination fee and shortage compensations, though I'm sure will have no chance of happened, does sound like a good agreement."

​