A conundrum involving toys.

[weesh]

Psh, I'm a girl, and though not a wife, still do not get it. I mean, what if it was a WoW figure... does she just have something against action figures? :S

I am absolutely not advocating ignoring the pony and hoping the problem will go away. There is either a good reason for this embargo, or there isn't. I can think of good reasons, though they seem unlikely. If there isn't a good reason, then there are some deeper issues that need to be hashed out here. Possibly with a professional.

Buying the toy in either situation is putting short term pleasure over a long term relationship.

[Incantatious]

I am deeply on the side of that you must, must be allowed to be true to yourself in a relationship, and your relationship must surely be accommodating to your interests rather than try to change them. I don't see the point in a relationship unless both individuals can maintain their own interests and loves.

Your wife doesn't have to necessarily like ponies of course, but at least respect your love for ponies enough to allow you to have them.. Ack, I hate that word: "allow". There really should be no question..

If you can have a proper chat with her about this, let her know how you feel. You shouldn't have to tiptoe around her in fear of her reaction as to what you truly like.

Wishing you the best of best luck. I hope you guys can find a good solution without having to compromise your pony love.

[maxishy]

^ indeed she could atleast say you could buy it and then place it in a private space (youre own workroom or something) she is youre wife as you respect her opioin she should respect yours if the whole house gets ponified then i get the point but this is one toy for crying out loud just dont buy it without talking to youre wife just explain the situation and i'm sure youre wife will understand

[Kirby Krackle]

See, this is why I love this forum. I'm getting marriage advice from a pony board. But anyway. Updates.

I talked things over briefly, making no mention of the figure in question. She's... more of a grump about this than I thought. There are little things, like the Saturday mornings. The main reason though is that, according to her, she will get embarrassed if I'm ever made a fool of because of ponies. That's it. That's the reason. Meh.

So, a compromise. It's for myself mostly. Hell, entirely. Today I bought the figure. And right now, it will be in pieces. Twilight herself will rest in my locker and be a Receiving-Pony. The rest of the set will be in the truck on a friend's car until such time as a) the embargo is lifted or b) I can learn to build hidden shelves.

[MyLittlePonyTales]

or b) I can learn to build hidden shelves.

Try the floorboards? : X

[Rosewind]

I'm glad you were able to work it out. Since toys sort of fall into a gray area for adults, there are other options.

[Ashton]

I'm glad you were able to work it out. Since toys sort of fall into a gray area for adults, there are other options.

O_O *throws money at the screen*

b) I can learn to build hidden shelves.

I have this wonderful book about making secret hiding places if your interested...

[flutterscotch]

hi hi

Hiding and sneaking certainly isn't the way to go about it, but really, even married folks need some things to themselves every now and again. Nothing wrong with that. I hope in the future this sort of thing isn't a problem for you.

Gingermint is correct on this one.

Allow me to let you in on the story of my brother. it is an extreme case, but is a kind of hilarious example of what happens when people try to hide toy consumption from their spouses.

My brother is 32, his wife is 34. He has an 8 year old son, and a 3 year old daughter. He also LOVES Transformers. Before he married his wife, who is the mother of the 3 year old, he and his son had a jolly time of buying toys, notably Transformers (and they shared a collection of both valuable ones, and ones to be played with). As he moved in with his wife, the Transformers were relegated to the playroom, and some things got destroyed, mostly g1s. So my brother replaced them. And I helped.

Well, Wifey didn't really like this so she put the kibosh on it. So my brother decided to hide it. Any transformers that came into the house automatically got blamed on me (which was fine within reason). In the meantime my brother is sneaking around, buying more and more Transformers and hiding this from his wife.

Needless to say she suspects him of cheating. So she snoops and pokes and prods and finds mysterious funds missing from his account, and phonecalls made several towns away....and comes to discover that nope, my brother is not cheating, he just has two storage units stuffed to the gills with Transformers. It did not go well.

i saw the collection over Christmas. She kind of has every right to be danceed. And this is coming from ME, a fellow toy collector.

______________________________________________________

On my end, my husband HATES the ponies (but I had a large collection when we met, so he knew what he was getting into). But really all that amounts to is occasionally him making them say stupid stuff in funny voices, and giving them all super 80's names. Basically he doesn't care that our house looks a bit like it's on crack.

[Rosewind]

That sounds more like a hoarding problem than a little nitpick between a husband and wife. I hope that situation was resolved in a pleasant way.

[Kirby Krackle]

I'm glad you were able to work it out. Since toys sort of fall into a gray area for adults, there are other options.

Can I... can I take you out to dinner or something? Do you need anybody killed? Anything?

[weesh]

I'm glad you were able to work it out. Since toys sort of fall into a gray area for adults, there are other options.

Wow, it is going to take an awful amount of rationalization to get a set of those. I should start working on it.

Just out of curiosity, how can you tell if a product is officially licensed?

[Rosewind]

Those products I linked are definitely fan-made and unofficial in every way possible. I know her personally and I have bought lots of stuff from her -- take that as you will. The vinyl decals look great on, well, anything, and the glassware is fantastic.

It's easier to slap a decal on the back of your car to show your love and support of FiM than trying to figure out what to do with a toy -- especially as an older fan.

[weesh]

It's easier to slap a decal on the back of your car to show your love and support of FiM than trying to figure out what to do with a toy -- especially as an older fan.

Really? The back? Not the side?

[Rosewind]

Really? The back? Not the side?

Any smooth surface! A brony at the convention where they were selling those actually stuck the Pinkie Pie decal on his speaker set and it looked gorgeous!

[Ashton]

Just out of curiosity, how can you tell if a product is officially licensed?

It will have the HASBRO logo somewhere on it (usually on the bottom)

[weesh]

It will have the HASBRO logo somewhere on it (usually on the bottom)

And for things online?

[Parker_Izing]

Use logic! shot glasses or other sort of booze containers are not likely official. The shirts of "welovefine" are endorsed on facebook by hasbro itself, so those are likely official stuff.

Hasbro just begun brainstorming on Brony phenomenon, so for a time just for kids stuff are like to exist.

[Rosewind]

I think Hasbro would make a lot more money if they intelligently tapped their surprise audience. Granted they must do this carefully, as they don't want to alienate their target audience (of money-spending parents). I still think they would make a killing if they upped the quality of their toys and figures with respect to the canon of the cartoon series itself (I'm lookin' at you, pink Celestia!) I know that will never happen as there is a rhyme and reason for how the toys are -- probably more to do with cost and production and Hasbro's intent to sell it to its intended audience.

A disc box set of the first season crammed with extras would be an instant hit.

[MyLittlePonyTales]

Just out of curiosity, how can you tell if a product is officially licensed?

It will have the HASBRO logo somewhere on it (usually on the bottom)

Pretty much. However, it's actually easier than that! If you see it in store, it's official. It will also have the logo, but generally it's not that hard to tell. If it's online, anything like an Etsy shop or stuff on DeviantArt is not official. Those Cutie Mark decals LOOK official, and may even just be vectors, but they are not sold by Hasbro. This is the base for "official." If it's sold on the Hasbro site, it is also official. If you're looking on Ebay or sites like that, Google or check the official site. Also, anything pony on Amazon should be official, as I doubt fans are allowed to sell merch there.

[accountdeleted]

Basically he doesn't care that our house looks a bit like it's on crack.

Your house sounds awesome.

A disc box set of the first season crammed with extras would be an instant hit.

Yay, interviews! Making ofs!

Actually... this would be a great way to get bronies to buy them. Perhaps then Hasbro could even upload the episodes to youtube, but keep the extras for the box sets.

Completely unlikely I know, let me have my dreams.

[Motion Paradox]

Good for you buying the toy set, even if you can't display it entirely right now.

But really, banning you from collecting something that's important to you on the off chance that you would be mocked for it?

I'd try talking about it one more time and saying that you appreciate her concern about you being mocked but that it is important to you and that if you did put them in a room set aside for yourself and somebody mentioned it the two of you could have an excuse ready, such as holding them for a friend or relative if she's really that concerned about it. You could even offer to let her do something that you don't like her doing without complaining if she promises to do the same with your Pony collecting (though if she's free to do whatever she likes without you expressing disapproval and then tries to prohibit you from collecting something you like that is extremely unfair; I know that if I were married, earning money and my spouse was free to persue their hobbies but then they tried to ban me from one of my hobbies, especially one that was extremely important to me I would continue my hobby anyway and bring every possible arguement into play if they objected)

But yes, I believe that in any sort of personal relationship you should be free to be who you are and if you're earning money you should be allowed to spend some on things that are important to you without having to ask permission and if you have to ask or if your spouse loses it if you buy something that they didn't approve of (for example, if they stay mad for hours because you bought a $5 toy)....Well, your spouse's disapproval isn't the largest problem

I'll give you an example, I like plush toys, I've been collecting them since I was a little Filly and I do own a lot of non-collectable ones, so many that I have storage bins full of them and for a time my parents banned me from buying them. But that didn't stop me, I always found a way around it whether it was buying them and hiding them until I got home or getting other relatives to buy them and I was extremely thurough when I bought them to make sure that there was no chance of being told to have them returned and yes they found out about them and they were agrevated at first but had to admit that all the careful planning I did to both buy and keep my newer toys was impressive for a 14 year old and they realised that they couldn't really stop me.

My point is you shouldn't feel that you have to ask permission to do something that matters to you, especially if you would have been able to do it freely when you were single. After all, the person you love should be the last one that you feel the need to hide your interests from. And if you buy something and she gets mad, so she's mad for a little while, and once the irratation of you disobeying her wears off she realises that this really is important to you and that she was being unfair trying to keep you from it and if she dosen't it's best that you find out about it and work through it now instead of years later when you've been stuck in this pattern for so long

(Sorry to ramble on like that, this is sort of a Passion filled topic for me, I always get so angry at those controling boy friends/husbands or the domenearing girl friends/wives you see on T.V. that try to make their lover/spouse be afraid of them getting mad for buying or doing something that they disapprove of)