ShadowStorm88 Posted October 22, 2011 Report Share Posted October 22, 2011 Name: Geary TwistSex: MaleRoleplay type: World of Equestria RPAge: Colt (17)Species: EarthponyPelt Color: Night blackMane/Tail/Markings Color & Style: Dark green, cut short in the front but abit long in the back. Has zigzags going throuhg tail.Eye Color: GreenCutie Mark: A brown bag, filled with tools sticking out like a hammer, wrench, saw, screwdriver, ect.Physique: Built really wellOrigin: Born in PonyvilleRoleplay Type: AllOccupation: HandymanMotivation: WIshes to be a master of building, capable of creating and constructing anything he puts his mind tooLikes: Making friends, doing physical work, hanging out, being nice, proving himself to others. Inline skatting.Dislikes: Condescending ponies, rudeness. Looking down on him cause of status level, being doubtedPersonality: Geary desires to be Equestrias greatest handypony, able to craft anything he can get his hooves on. He's kind, down to earth, humble, abit sarcastic, senstive at times, and daring. One of his greatest fears it failure, or making a fool of himself. For this, he tries to cover up his fear with laughter and joking. Since his occupation is amongst hte blue collared workers, he does repesct those of higher staus, but onbly those that he deems worhty; as in humble and not snotty about thier status. Otherwise, he dislikes them greatlyCharacter Summary: His mother was a unicorn, and his father a pegasus, Geary is quiet close to his parents and Geary apperciates all that his parents have done for him. With his joking personality, Geary has quiet a amount of friends, but his sarcasm at the same time gains him enemies. When Gearywas younger, he would watch his father build and create things that one would not think possibe. such as an automatic egg cooker that take apart an egg from the inside, and cooks it. Combining items to create an eaiser way of life for ponies. When he became old enough, he started working alongside his dad in order ot learn everything possible about building things. During a lighting storm, his father was away for the weekend and the shed door was wide open. Seeing that thier was a possiblity it could burn down because of all the metal objects inside attracting lighting, he went outside to close the door. However, on his way to leave after closeing it; a bolt struck a nearby tree branch, causing it to fall and pin his leg. Stuck undenrath it, he called for help but sadly couldnt be heard over the raging storm. Luckily, a saw from the work bench was in reach as he grabbed it and used it to cut off the heaviest part of the branch. Saving himself, he was able to get inside where his mother helped treat his injury, and his leg luckily survived. Later when resting in bed, he felt a strange sensation and when he looked at his flank; he saw his cutie mark. Saving his life through the use of a tool, and how he came close to loseing his leg helped him get an idea of what he wanted to do with his life; but at the same time made him afarid of failing. This was due to an event a few years ago, when he tried to create craft togehter a mechanical carraige the didnt require the use of another pony to make it g, which created a fear of failure. However, he was unable to keep it from staying on course as it went out of control off the track, and fell to pieces. Prior to this, he crafted together a steam-powered clothes hanging machine. A device that grabs clothes from the wash and hangs them automatically on the clothesline. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dessa Posted October 25, 2011 Report Share Posted October 25, 2011 I think the thing most needed here is a bit of your pony's personality, Lucerne. In this story, he's kind of acted upon, but doesn't really act. Two major events just occurred in Chenzel's life: He lost a leg and got a cutie mark. How are these events related? Why did they occur at the same time? How does Chenzel react to having lost his leg? A cutie mark isn't just an occupation, it's a coming-of-age, and it defines a pony's direction or destiny. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ShadowStorm88 Posted October 25, 2011 Author Report Share Posted October 25, 2011 Well, he didnt loose his leg. Also, he had to rely on himself when no other pony was around to help hium by useing a tool nearby to free himself from the tree branch. He has a permant limp in one leg, but thats really it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dio Posted October 25, 2011 Report Share Posted October 25, 2011 This is a great outline to start with. As Dessa said, however, we could definitely use more exposition on his personality, a glimpse inside his head if you will. It's important to be able to flesh out a character's motivations and desires, virtues and vices, before you can properly interact with other ponies in RP. What is he afraid of? What makes him giddy with excitement? How does he see other ponies?A more nitpicky tweak I would also suggest would be on the subject of the tool shed. Metal does not automatically attract lightning strikes; it will only do this if it is in the right shape and the right location, such as in an elevated position. He could have been simply concerned over whether or not doors were locked. Rain can cause exposed metal tools to rust and wooden tools to warp, neither of which are good for a handypony.Also, his name does not seem very pony-like. I remember our IRC conversation and I do recall your explanation of the chisel and hammer. However, as mentioned in the character creation guide, ponies do not use the First-name Last-name structure like humans or other species like Griffons. Also, while Lucerne is certainly a type of hammer, it is a medieval weapon and from what I'm gathering of your character, you do not want him to be combative in any way. Thus a more benign implement might be more appropriate.Finally, please use the topic tag system to identify your OC as detailed in the first part of the OC application form. This will make it easier for us to identify and handle your character application in the long run. Thanks. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MyLittlePonyTales Posted October 28, 2011 Report Share Posted October 28, 2011 How is this Application coming along? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ShadowStorm88 Posted October 31, 2011 Author Report Share Posted October 31, 2011 I need help. Please, can some pony give me suggestions. Im brain dead on the new name thing. For something related of wnating to be a master builder.I added a personality, can u tell me what u think? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dessa Posted October 31, 2011 Report Share Posted October 31, 2011 He's a handyman? Does he have a specific area of expertise, or is it just as a general fixit pony? You can always look at tools of the trade, or at some of the specific jargon they use. Coming up with a specific field of handy work for your pony might help here, and it might help you get in your pony's head more, too.Okay, so he's a bit insecure, funny, and respects authority. He's starting to fill out, but the more you can develop this, the easier and more fun it will be to roleplay him when you're ready, yeah? More possible questions: How does he feel about his family? Does he have any friends, or enemies? WHY is he so afraid of failure? Was there an event or a series of events that made him that way? Tying a background and personality together make both stronger, and it can help you understand the psychology of your character. It can also make your app read better.I'm still curious about that cutie mark too. It seems like he got it for having a tree branch fall on him. How did this help him realize or accept his destiny? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ShadowStorm88 Posted November 3, 2011 Author Report Share Posted November 3, 2011 He wants to be a general, being able to fix/craft anything really.Also, it wasn;t the tree that helped him get his cutie mark. The fact that he had to use a tool to save his life, and leg in order to free himself from the tree is wht gave him his cutie mark. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BlindJester Posted November 3, 2011 Report Share Posted November 3, 2011 How is this app coming along? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ShadowStorm88 Posted November 4, 2011 Author Report Share Posted November 4, 2011 Edited it again, but still having problems with the name. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SunsetSombra Posted November 9, 2011 Report Share Posted November 9, 2011 Hey, if you're having some troubles with names, there's always online sites that tell you various terms of the trade...I'll provide one I found to start you off!http://www.homebuild...om/Glossary.htm - This one seems fairly in depth...perhaps your new name is only a few clicks away here! ^^ Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ShadowStorm88 Posted November 9, 2011 Author Report Share Posted November 9, 2011 Okay, edited again. Tell me what you ponies think of this name: Romax TektonRomax is another word for explaing electirtc cable. Which i guess says that he has a spakring personality.Tekton is the name of a brand hammer.Wht do u all think? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RCTwilightSparkle Posted November 15, 2011 Report Share Posted November 15, 2011 How is this application coming along?- RC Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ShadowStorm88 Posted November 17, 2011 Author Report Share Posted November 17, 2011 Ive been adding stuff on, and evne asked a few question; but no one is answering or responding to them Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SunsetSombra Posted November 18, 2011 Report Share Posted November 18, 2011 Well, if it helps...I like the name! :3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ShadowStorm88 Posted November 19, 2011 Author Report Share Posted November 19, 2011 Tks....but I need an admin to look it over.. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BlindJester Posted November 26, 2011 Report Share Posted November 26, 2011 It's a nice name, but I don't think it's very pony like, but that's just me personally.How is this app coming? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
brianblackberry Posted November 27, 2011 Report Share Posted November 27, 2011 Okay, edited again. Tell me what you ponies think of this name: Romax TektonRomax is another word for explaing electirtc cable. Which i guess says that he has a spakring personality.Tekton is the name of a brand hammer.Wht do u all think?I looked over these names and found the following: Romex is a trademark brand of electrical wiring and Tekton is also a brand name. If they were simply types of stuff it be acceptable, but as there are trademarked names for a particular company's merchandise I am going to have to say no. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ShadowStorm88 Posted November 27, 2011 Author Report Share Posted November 27, 2011 Oh i see.... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BlindJester Posted December 6, 2011 Report Share Posted December 6, 2011 How is this app coming along, Val? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ShadowStorm88 Posted December 6, 2011 Author Report Share Posted December 6, 2011 Miserably. I stil cant figure out a name for a pony who wants to be a jack-of-all-trades, craftspony. And i dont even know if thats the only problem now. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RCTwilightSparkle Posted December 17, 2011 Report Share Posted December 17, 2011 If no comment is made saying you'd like to keep this application it will be locked in 5 days, thank you.- RCTwi Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ShadowStorm88 Posted December 17, 2011 Author Report Share Posted December 17, 2011 Yes, Im still here. Im seriously stuck on this pony. No pony is offering me any advice on a name, since thats the only thing as of now holding my pony from being accepted back. But it seems that no one is even the least be intersted in even helping me with that Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Manestream Posted December 18, 2011 Report Share Posted December 18, 2011 Hmm, a name for a handy-man pony....Hooves McGee?Crafty Jack (Afterall we have a "Pony-joe" in the show. You could make his 'real name something like Crafty spark, but he goes by crafty jack)Arch stronghoof?Bevel Cantertrot?Geary Twist?Cogs Hoofbit?Maybe some of these might inspire an idea. I personally feel that if you think *too* hard about making the name 'work exactly', it gets away from you. Twilight sparkle really has nothing to do with magic OR books, but the name is perfect for her, isnt it? Maybe say some of these out loud, and see if they take you anywhere Keep in touch with me- I want to make sure your getting the help you need! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ShadowStorm88 Posted December 18, 2011 Author Report Share Posted December 18, 2011 Okay then, I think Geary Twist sounds pretty good ^_^. Thanks for that Mane . Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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