flutterscotch

Our Friendly Neighborhood SteelEagle is going to be busy for a few days, so I am going to jump in here. [colour=#ff0000]First things first. you are going to need to reword a the entire history in your own words (it pulls just a little too heavily from the Wikipedia entry on Roger Waters, and we condemn plagiarism in any form.) Please do this immediately or we are going to have to lock your application and file it away at 3:27 PM EST tomorrow.[/colour] There are a few other issues that I I have to point out as well. While having a pony character who is influenced or a parody of a real person or character from somewhere else is OK if it is ponyfied enough in WoE, having what is known as an expy, (exported character, and I am going with exported character because Roger Waters' public persona may be different from his private one as is the case with most rock stars) is not, so you are going to have to make him more his own pony, or he will have to be considered a crossover application. You have to rewrite that that part of his history anyway, so you can tone down the direct correlation while you are at it, maybe change some things up a bit. I do rather like the character summary you have for him. It gives a really good sense of who he is, and if I did not know this was explicitly supposed to be a pony version of Roger Waters, I would still think it works. He's a talented, but WAY too haughty, jerk on par with Trixie, but has the skills to back it up. Of course you were originally going to use him in crossovers partially anyway, so if you want to stick to classic Roger totally just getting his ego everywhere but being a pony, you'd be able to run with it better in Crossovers anyway. Other than that, a few things we're definitely going to need you to change, there's a little British slang term used as an intensifier that you use that is not even a deal(huge or not) here in the US, but is considered quite a bit ruder over there in England. There are other words that mean almost the same thing but with far less offense, but if you are going to use them maybe sure that you know how offensive they might be considered in their country of origin. Not only in your application, but RP as well, unless RP happens to be in 18+. Just don't use it. It would not be used in a kids' show in England. as much as I love pun place names... Great Earthham Surrey Gotta go. Not on the map. Unless you're aiming for crossovers. Other than that, I hope you know that Trotters is also the name of pigs hooves, which is kind of funny given the circumstances, and you need to change a few more "Wrights" for consistency.

Good luck to you and the wifey! I am going to be semi-MIA for a bit. End of the year = course releases and holiday (crafting) plans. I'll be popping in, but not nearly as regularly as I have been. The say after the day after Christmas though? 3 DAY PONY ALL THE TIME!

Hello again everypony! I am dropping by here to talk about one of my favorite subjects "how do I get out of a tricky situation or plot without doing things the RP staff will shake their collective heads sadly at", and offer helpful suggestions. Now, it is tempting (and natural) to be rational and tackle problems or challenges in RP the most efficient way possible, but sometimes that not only skirts on the edges of being a little too much for the tone of the WoE forum, but solves the problems too easily and might make for a less-rich RP experience. This is Equestria, after all, a land of whimsy and colourful ponies who can break the laws of physics and common sense. So, if you you need to ask someone if something might be considered a little too advanced or overly powerful to be allowed in in the World Of Equestria Slice of Life forum, the best solution is to just change your approach and do something goofy. A few examples (more to be added) Getting Characters who can not fly naturally to be up in the clouds. After all, one of the greatest visual gags ever is a Rube Goldberg device! So have fun, and remember that the most entertaining way from point A to Point B is definitely not a straight line. When in doubt, a silly means to an end is probably going to be more acceptable and true to the show than a magically powerful or technologically advanced one, especially if you keep it as a one-time event in your RPs.

We wait a week before we even begin to assess Cast applications (as in we don't even look at them, we just note when they were submitted) and to give others a chance to apply if they so choose to. Saturday might not be unreasonable as long as the application doesn't need work, depending on everyone's schedule.

LOL. You mean besides the MASSIVE plothole that hinges on the Studio being obliviously stupid and coming up with a way more complicated plan to subjugate the unicorns than necessary? It's there intentionally. This is supposed to be a parody of a darker and edgier Equestria. I was reading some George Saunders when this came to me. i have an idea in mind that will give some people the chance, In the FFA section probably, to play canon cast characters as close to the way they are on the show as possible. And my character will just be the "Arthur Dent" who is caught up in it, but I want the characters themselves to be the heroes.

Marshmalllllooooww FLLLUUUUFFFFF!!!! I'll have you know I pass the old Fluff factory every morning on my way to work. And have always thought of applying for a Fluffernutter pony in RP. Welcome to Canterlot! I'll take a lollipop!

Don't feel bad. Almost every RP topic I have made that I did not actively coerce people to join before I started it didn't get any responses.

There goes the NEIGH-borhood.

Possibly eventually. You should follow this thread: We drop news about RP stuff there, in advance of implementing it even, so that should be your primary news source. Believe me when I say the RP and Lore teams are aware of things mentioned in RP. We analyse things and how they will affect our RP a lot, often immediately after or DURING the episode, but right now, the Crystal Empire and Crystal Ponies are taking precedence.

That is not what you were asked to do at all. You were asked for a simple description.

Yay! Another member of the original demographic Who was your favorite pony as a child?

Hhahah no, I have just been around awhile, and am a part of the Roleplay helpstaff. So's Armony. If you have any RP questions, you can let us, or any member of the team know! I do try to greet new members though.

Welcome! It is OK to blame Tenkan. We blame him for everything else.

Make sure you change the title of your first post

Hello SpringWheat, even though I have already talked to you a bunch in chat! And we don't mind incompetence. Just look at me, I'm still here.

WHAAASSSUUUUPPPPP! R to the O to the LE- to the P-O-N-Y. We don't hate anyone. Even those who drink haterade.

Oh my goodness! Welcome! Don't let anyone tell you that there's anything wrong with casual gaming. *brohoof* we casuals have to stick together!

Hello and welcome DiamondBurn How does one become a freelance Roleplayer? There's a paying job for RPing? SIGN ME UP!

Ok! So I copied your application as it stands right now and made some comments and questions in red, and then added an overall analysis below that. Roleplay Type:World of Equestria Name:MorningDawn Sex: Male Age: Young Stallion Species:Pegasus Eye colour: Brown Coat colour: Light Brown Mane/Tail/Markings colour & Style:Both mane and tail are Dark Brown with a tinge of red around the edges Physique: Short [colour=#ff0000]So far, so good![/colour] Cutie Mark: Mining Symbol [colour=#ff0000]Please elaborate this. As I said before, I see a crossed hammers in your profile pic, but there are a lot of different mining symbols.[/colour] Origin/Residence:Manehattan Occupation:Messenger pony/ Coal Miner [colour=#ff0000]It sounds like, according to his history, that would only be interested in being GOLD miner. I think it is safe to say just a messenger pony at this point.[/colour] Motivation:He wishes to fall in love [colour=#ff0000]Why is this his main motivation? What will he do when he achieves this motivation? Surely he has other goals in live than just falling in love. Does he want to be a great miner?[/colour] History:[colour=#ff0000](<--You need to add this field to your application)[/colour] As a colt MorningDawn was drawn toward many things. He had a curiosity about the guards that work to protect the Princess, eventually he wanted to become a guard. His main plan was to join the guards, but he was curious about other jobs, too! In an attempt to get his cutie mark, he read hundreds of books on hundreds of occupations and jobs. He read a book about farming, so he gave it a try and left the plants to find them dead the next day. [colour=#ff0000]Those poor plants! [/colour] He knew he didn't want to try that again, so he kept reading books. After 5 volumes of encyclopedias, he gave up. He tossed a book to the ground finding a page spilling its contents to him. As usual he was curious, so he read about the page. It had to do with mining, minerals, and what kept Morning's wealthy family's fireplace going, coal! He wasn't really interested in that black rock, so he kept reading on about what kinds of materials you might find while mining. The materials all had scientific names that Morning had to read over 5 or 6 times before he got the word. He kept reading on and found the one material that his family actually was very fond of, gold! [colour=#FF0000]Make this a new paragraph. [/colour]He read more and more about the caves, how the cave systems might have water ways, or tunnels. He even read that creatures live in those caves! Finally, Morning couldn't take it! He ran outside with a lantern in his pouch and ran over to the ground. He started hacking at it, more and more, twice the power. It was his first time so he tired out quickly and found the idea was now silly. You can't find dark, deep, adventurous, thrilling caves just by hacking at the ground! That is just silly, so Morning stopped and walked into the house. He found a map his Great Grandfather kept during his prospecting ages, but now he sits in a chair and sleeps all day. He read the map over and found a small cave system nearby. He talked with his parents about it and they agreed. As long as Morning had gear. [colour=#FF0000]Make this a new paragraph. [/colour]In the morning he ran over to the small cave and walked into the darkness. Eventually he lit his lantern and found some of those materials in that book, the scientific kinds. He gave a try at it and got the hang of it. Soon he was carrying full pouches of various rocks and materials. He lugged himself to home and took off the pouches. His Great Grandfather came and yelled in excitement, but then he said something, " Look! MorningDawn! You got your cutie mark!" Morning looked at his flank and Ta Da! His cutie mark appeared! [colour=#ff0000](so this is his special talent, but how does this help him in the Royal Guard?)[/colour] [colour=#FF0000]Make this a new paragraph. [/colour]He loved the fact that he could mine now, but his parents don't let him go often. Then he turned to his idea of becoming a guard. He tried multiple times to convince his parents, but they simply did not approve. In anger he ran away to a place that his parents would probably not find him, his basement. He spent hours sitting in the basement thinking about how he would get to the guards. [colour=#FF0000]Make this a new paragraph. He[/colour] found a bookcase in the basement, hopefully he could find his answers there. He read hours on a book that really had nothing to do with the subject on matter. He was intrigued by the book so he kept reading on. When he finished, he walked out of his basement and apologized to his parents. They were sorry as well and accepted his apology. [colour=#ff0000](What answers did he find, or what made him decide to apologize to his parents?)[/colour] His parents granted him the right to go into the guards, but MorningDawn was to serve only by delivering letters. He was excited and went to bed early that night. He woke up in the morning to find his parents downstairs eating in the kitchen. They told him that he was going to be trained by a Sargent that works to protect Princess Celestia. [colour=#FF0000]Make this a new paragraph. [/colour]The first couple of days it was rough and he took some emotional damage, but whenever he pulled out the book his parents told him to keep, he was cheered up. On the boot camp he was trained to fly, he was trained to be the best. He wasn't forced to by the leaders, but he wanted to be the best. When he graduated from the camp he earned the title " Private Messenger Pony MorningDawn". He was glad to finally have a job and wanted to start work right away. The day after graduation he was sent on a delivery mission. He did as he was told, not to look at the boxes inside. He was curious to what was in it though. He made it to the town he was delivering to and dropped the box off, but before he did that he looked at the note on the box. It was for him and it said : Stick around town, you will be needing to get more packages. The note was anonymous and he had no clue who wrote it, but orders are orders. Currently he sits outside wondering who's packages he would have to deliver. [colour=#FF0000]Make this a new paragraph. [/colour]He pulls out the book his parents gave him. [colour=#ff0000](When did his parents give this book to him? Was it a graduation present? Was it a hint from his parents that they wanted grandfoals? ) [/colour]He reads it and already knows the ending. The stallion and the mare kiss, they get married, they get a nice house, they have kids, they are friends with everypony and they die a happy life. He too, wants to fall in love. It seems skeptical for a young colt to fall in love, but its his choice now is it. [colour=#ff0000](I do not think he is a young colt anymore, so can you change this, please? it doesn't seem too out of line that a young stallion would want to find true love.)[/colour] Character Summary: MorningDawn is a young excited young stallion ready to explore the world, that is if he had permission to. He has a stubborn attitude, but can follow orders or commands. He is a curious young fellow who, at times, explores everything and anything he can. His motivation is to fall in love, so he travels from town to town meeting new mares. [colour=#ff0000](Does he do this while he is delivering packages for the royal guard?)[/colour] He is a Young Stallion waiting for change, and it comes at any moment. [colour=#ff0000]Can you tell us a little more about him here? Please tell us more about what he likes and doesn't like. At this point we do not even know what kind of Mare he could fall in love WITH. [/colour] [colour=#ff0000]He seems very easily willing to believe whatever he reads in books. Will that cause him trouble later in life?[/colour] [colour=#FF0000]Does he have any hobbies or quirks?[/colour] I think the issues you are having with this application is that you might be trying to do too much with one character for your very first character. If you want a miner pony, you should just stick with that, and make another character who is a messenger later on. If you want a guard/messenger pony, you should go that route and change the cutie mark and corresponding story. I think that will help with his twisted history a little bit, because If I knew your pony in real life I would keep asking him why, if his special talent is mining, is he in the Royal Guard. Whichever you choose, either of them can want to fall in love, but I really don't think that should be a primary motivation. Almost everyone wants to find someone to love, and they don't need to read from a book to feel that.

You shouldn't have a profile for the dog, all companion animal information should be in the application for the owner. So you might want to put any information we need to know about Swiftrunner in this application.

Hello Clair! A few little things. Can you clarify this: [colour=#0000CD]The cage represents her possessive nature of her friends.[/colour][colour=#282828] You mean that she is very possessive of her friends and not that she feels caged by the possessive nature in which they treat her, right? I know it is clarified later in her history but you might want to reword that because upon first read it sets up a distinctly differnt impression [/colour] [colour=#282828]You also might want to leave out the bits about physically fighting. While I am sure it'll happen here or there, I am not sure it should be something so important to her character that it needs to be mentioned in what is essentially her bio! Saying she can be very brave and heroic when her friends, family and those weaker than her, despite her regular timidity would tell us that .[/colour] [colour=#282828]i feel like we have a strong grasp on her extra curricular activities, but not what she gets out of them. Can you expand a little on why she does take on so many hobbies, and what they mean to her a little bit ? [/colour] [colour=#282828]I just feel that overall your cutie mark story is fantastic, and because it's there for comparison, the history and character summary just need a little more oomph. [/colour]

I get the impression that Pierrot was rather groomed by his family to be an illusionist, and he ended up spectacular at pantomime. Illusion magic is supposed to be fairly difficult though, and his special talent is definitely a complex mixture of making people laugh and masking his own feelings, not necessarily illusion magic, which is a dicey subject within board canon as it is. HOWEVER, I am 100% OK if his "illusion magic" is really just regular lifting things in a fine tuned manner. If the magic users in the troupe just as a family secret perfected the art of ethereally manipulating a particulate matter like glitter? The audience wouldn't know the difference...plus it'd be SPARKLIERER! It would be great if he could hone his skills one day to actually form words above his head! Prench-Itailian Hmm. Prance hasn't been officially incorporated into the map. I get it, I get that the accent definitely exists in-universe, but I am trying to think of what you can call it without referencing a place that technically doesn't exist! Also, is he left in care of both his aunt the bearded lady, and his aunt the illusionist? Other than that he is fantastic and well thought out. I want to snuggle his little face

Cute character! I hope you get her history and character worked out soon!

Hiya Flamedrago! You've got a pretty great character here that is very close to approval, i just have a handful of questions about him that if you can clarify he should be approved shortly. First is that I am going to have to ask you to cut the part about dropping out of school. It doesn't change much about the character, but since we're an all ages forum, and we have a lot of impressionable kids, we don't really want to cast it in that much of a positive light, even though it might be the best choice for people in real life. Just squeaking by is fine though, and leaving home the second he graduated without a really great plan other than winging it at being an author while having a day job is great. It shows us that unless he is working on mystery novels, he is totally squandering his potential. I like that he is a product of the well-to-do, and decided to do his own thing without their help. In regards to his house, I just have a question I personally am curious. Did he have any money from his parents that went towards the purchasing of the house? It seems like on his salary he might be more of an apartment-dweller, but you can clarify there. I definitely like that "Hundreds of copies" is a huge hit in Equestria though! That brings it down to a good level of successful enough, but not too successful that your character is immediately famous. Just those two little things though, and you should be good to go!